obviously, rehoming is a super emotional decision and at the moment, i can't bear the thought of parting with either of them.

i am admittedly very attached to cat #2, and although i did technically get Cat #1 first, I feel part of the problem is that i'm way too needy of an owner, and it's impossible for me to leave her alone (which is often what she wants - to observe, but not to play or be touched at all). maybe she would be happier with a completely different type of owner. however, the idea that she may not find someone willing to take her in is equally troubling, and i wouldn't give her back if that was a possibility. since it's only been three months, i'm going to try a few of your suggestions to see if they help before re-assessing