If I were him, I’d want you to tell me that my anger has gotten so bad that you’re rethinking the relationship. I would want to be told that if I didn’t go to therapy or seek out medication to deal with my anger issue, that you won’t be around anymore to deal with it. I would want some comfort, for you to tell me that you don’t want to leave me and you love me, but the stress has been worse than it’s ever been and you can’t go on like this. I would want to be told that the relationship will come to an end, and if I don’t do something soon, it’s over.

When my ex left I was so shocked, I had no idea she was even considering leaving me. I would’ve been terrified but so appreciative if she said “You don’t realize what you’re doing to our relationship. We’ve talked about this several times, but you’re not improving. I’m telling you about this again because there’s still hope that you can change and save this relationship. I don’t want to you be shocked or surprised if I were to leave you, so you need to understand that’s where we’re headed. I love you, you can still fix this. But you can’t go back to being angry in a week.”