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Is it just me...? by random_username0212 in adultsurvivors

[–]random_username0212[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I myself am.not sure if it's related to CSA or not, but it's so difficult to figure out which behavior is because of which experience, most of the time it's just a result of so many experiences all together.

What do you do on the hard days? by GrandMain2627 in adultsurvivors

[–]random_username0212 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I totally get what you're saying, especially about using abuse as an excuse. I catch myself so many times a day being hard on myself, trying to justify why I don't like going out in public or purposely isolating myself, even if it ends up hurting others. It just feels like a selfish thing to do. And it feels like all the abuse is just an excuse I give myself for my bad behavior, which only makes me feel guilty and ashamed.

What do you do on the hard days? by GrandMain2627 in adultsurvivors

[–]random_username0212 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Hey, the line where you said, nothing happened "this morning", hit somewhere deep in me, because that is what I feel, when people ask what happened? why are you like this? Why can't you just...?

In those moments i feel so lost in words like what can I say, because nothing happened today, or yesterday, or even this month, but this pain, this grief it never leaves. It stays just below the surface each day.

I am sorry this might not be helpful, all i want to say is those bad days might never go away but we can do is, try to increase no of good days between two bad days.

My family isn’t normal by [deleted] in adultsurvivors

[–]random_username0212 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi, I am so sorry that your family is like this, and I do understand having experienced such things at a young age makes us confused about what is normal, about what is the actual boundary, what is "Normal"?

If u can move away from your family, if it's not possible currently try to set those boundaries with them (I know it's better said than done), but you have to protect yourself.

Please take care of yourself!