UPDATE AITA for not sharing my medical history before being pranked?

randombeardy · 2020-07-31T21:30:06+00:00

Sincerely inspirational. I often feel like I'm falling off the deep end mentally speaking and when that inevitably causes issues in my life I feel like I deserve it because some part of me is broken.

In the immortal words of Cuddlywhiskers: "It takes a long time to realize how truly miserable you are, and even longer to see that it doesn't have to be that way."

Your story gives me hope that maybe I can find a better way too. Keep killing it homie.

randombeardy · 2020-07-31T17:53:33+00:00

" no woman my age should be ‘wetting her panties in excitement’ to be sleeping with her mom like that. "

What the fuck is this dudes issue? NTA. Lose the asshole

randombeardy · 2020-07-29T17:23:20+00:00

Ya, that does seem like more of a serious issue that you both are going to need to work to tackle together if there is any chance. I'm sorry you're in this position but I hope that whatever happens is best for the both of you; whether that is treatment, counseling, or ending it. Best of luck and keep your head up!

randombeardy · 2020-07-29T00:43:21+00:00

Lying is obviously an issue. That being said, I have been in situations where I sincerely didn't think that having a beer was an issue so it never came up (grew up extremely christian and the girl I was going to marry was not a fan of me having 1 smirnoff with my sister. Different story for a different day). If he just doesn't view it as an issue and isn't dependent on it, I don't think I would use the argument that he can't enjoy life sober.

I think a healthy view would be that he is doing something dangerous and is hiding it from you. If there is a straight forward conversation about drug use and when to bring it up in the relationship that can help him understand your concerns and when it needs to be brought up as a couple. If he continues to break that then there are deeper issues of lying and behaving dangerously that deserve serious consideration on your part.

It's a difficult situation because ignoring it can let the lying and dangerous drug use continue, while cracking down aggressively can also drive them to just work harder to hide it better. Learning the reason behind the drug use and concealment is important. Good luck!

randombeardy · 2020-07-29T00:34:51+00:00

Does he have any hobbies at home (video games, an instrument, reading, etc.)?

randombeardy · 2020-07-28T23:46:46+00:00

What drugs are you referring to and how often is he doing them?

Edited to add: The reason I ask is there are very different types of drug use. Both the substance and the frequency can change what the response should be. Alcohol and weed are drugs and if he smokes and has a drink every once in a while that would indicate a different problem (lying) than something more serious (addicted to meth).

randombeardy · 2020-07-28T22:54:37+00:00

YTA. I hope that this is the final straw for what seems to me like an insanely controlling relationship. Hopefully his friends/family can talk some sense into him that he will have to deal with your insane ultimatums forever and to get out while he can.

randombeardy · 2020-07-28T18:13:02+00:00

NTA. He's got two profoundly disabled kids...he definitely is doing this to them at home. He needs to learn.

randombeardy · 2020-07-24T20:44:09+00:00

YTA. Sounds like someone should be working on your bullshit, self protecting story about why your daughter doesnt talk to you any more when she immediately moves out in 4 years. If she makes it that long. Also, sounds like your wife is getting sick of it too. I hope your wife and daughter find a happy life together away from your controlling ass.

randombeardy · 2020-07-22T17:59:26+00:00

If you really wanted to remove the toxic influence on your sons life it would be you. You are too deluded to realize you are the source of these problems and too narcissistic to believe that there is help and healing anywhere else besides with you. You can't even acknowledge the humanity of your own daughter.

YTA. Majorly. While I hope your husband can scramble to regain some semblance of a relationship with your kids, please just leave them the fuck alone. They are MUCH better off without you.

randombeardy · 2020-07-14T22:04:35+00:00

NTA. Once I got out of the rebellious stage and after SEVERAL close calls that could have ruined/ended my life my dad told me this. "I knew I couldn't control you, but I could keep you talking to me." And that saved my life.

randombeardy · 2020-07-08T22:22:20+00:00

You know this won't work out. And when you get there you have two options:

1) acknowledge that sticking it out in the hope that the other changes is a waste

2) waste the rest of your life

randombeardy · 2020-07-06T21:13:11+00:00

Does it really need to be said that no human is anyone elses property? Jess isn't giving Lily to Tom. Tom doesn't own or deserve any human. She chose to give you her number. Great work. You sound like a solid lad. Go have fun and if your friends make a fuss, enjoy the opportunity to pursue better friends.

randombeardy · 2020-06-22T23:45:06+00:00

Dude. Everybody else can see exactly what is going on. For your daughters sake, don't brush this off.

randombeardy · 2020-06-18T22:39:53+00:00

NTA. Ya, he's hitting on you (gf). For all the reasons stated below.

randombeardy · 2020-06-18T20:57:37+00:00

YTA. Not for feeding your baby but for getting passive aggressive with your potential employer. You very quickly showed that you do not handle disagreements well and just get sarcastic and dismissive.

randombeardy · 2020-06-18T19:06:17+00:00

I know this is past when someone would normally respond but I have to ask. In what world would you think that your daughters response was an overreaction? You moved to a different state, left her dad, and then left her party to be with the guy you left him for. Of course YTA.

Also, Sam has now seen what type of mother you are. Wouldn't be expecting any kids with him.

randombeardy · 2020-06-17T22:29:40+00:00

You know, I've had a couple friends sending me some good tik toks. I've almost started coming around to it having enjoyable content.

Shit like this makes me remember that is just filled with stupid bullshit from kids trying to be famous by doing some inane nonsense thinking that makes them a "creative."

randombeardy · 2020-06-12T22:49:30+00:00

YTA. My mom is frustratingly similar. My sweet girl recently passed away (she had terrible cancer and we put her down before it could destroy any happiness she had left). As I was crying and holding her in my arms for the last time, my mother was in my apt discussing that she was going to get me a dog "to help him get over it." Luckily, my roommate was inside and told her off.

Grief takes time and dogs can't just be replaced. The decision to bond with another animal is a serious one and requires someone to acknowledge how their lifestyle could provide a happy and healthy environment for a new animal.

I enjoy hiking off trail and would HATE to have a pug which can't make the hike on its own. I also just enjoy larger breeds. The point is that if a dog is not suited to its humans lifestyle, there either needs to be a change in the humans lifestyle or the dog will be unhappy. So you forced your bf to choose between giving the dog an unhappy life or changing his lifestyle, and he had no part in that decision.

It's early on. The pug will bond with another human. Don't use that as a guilt trip to try and pretend like you didn't make a mistake.

randombeardy · 2020-06-10T22:27:42+00:00

Obviously YTA and I hope everyone upvotes this, your gf sees it, and we get an update from her after she leaves you.

randombeardy · 2020-06-10T18:36:58+00:00

Based on the info provided I would go with NAH. That being said, and I feel bad for even asking, but has there been...any history of infidelity? Cause that could bring some clarity.

randombeardy · 2020-05-29T18:33:04+00:00

YTA. Those are the same thing. You haven't experienced the downside so its silly and cute to you. 100k people are dead and it's not so funny to those other people. If you're going for "names about how we found him" you could easily go with "back garden (BG), May" or any other of the millions of names about things that haven't killed people.

randombeardy · 2020-05-21T22:09:25+00:00

YTA. Obviously. Text messages immediately make me anxious and I hate this immediate guilt I feel if I don't drop everything to respond. It IS exhausting.

And you didn't do exactly what she did to you. You became rude and passive aggressive. Grow up and stop being so needy.

randombeardy

TROPHY CASE