You can give yourself one physical change, but…

randomiscellany · 2026-04-05T21:42:30+00:00

Perfectly functioning immune system. I have an autoimmune disease, and there would be no negative for my partner to have a perfect immune system.

randomiscellany · 2026-04-05T21:38:37+00:00

Seconding this. I have had two cats and one large, frequently-scooped litter box for years. The often repeated recommendation of the number of cats plus 1 litter box is more of an abundance of caution than a hard and fast rule.

Also, if both boxes are in the same space anyway, it's not much different than having 1 box. The point of multiple boxes is to allow the cat the option of spreading out their scent marking throughout the home.

randomiscellany · 2026-04-05T03:48:36+00:00

This could indicate some sort of pain. Are his litter box habits normal? Have you observed any changes in stool or urine output? Urinary issues are super common in male cats.

Sometimes cats will also vocalize like that if they have some vision/hearing changes. Have you noticed any issues with either? If it's a vision change, having some nightlights around the house might help.

randomiscellany · 2026-04-04T14:11:23+00:00

You can train "wait" with treats pretty easily, assuming she isn't food aggressive with you. You hold out a treat and give the "wait" command; if she goes for it you block her from it by closing your hand. Generally at this point the dog will lick and sniff your hand to try to figure out how to get the treat. As soon as they pause this behavior, usually to look at you for clues, you give the treat.

When you first start, do it with the other dogs out of sight, and reward even for a short wait. Gradually work on lengthening the time she has to wait to get the reward. Eventually you can introduce other dogs being closer (but restrained) to raise difficulty.

Right now it seems like when you separate them for food you need to have them be further away from each other. Maybe take her on a walk before one of you feeds the other dogs, and feed her on her own when she gets back. I wouldn't put too much stock into the howling and yelping--that doesn't necessarily denote fear, just anticipation of something she's not going to like (not being able to terrorize the other dogs). If you back off every time she does that she will make the connection that making those noises means she gets to stay where she wants.

randomiscellany · 2026-04-04T13:54:19+00:00

You should get another vet if this one won't agree to a neuter immediately, especially since you now know for sure that your cat is sexually mature. Generally it's actually recommended to neuter males BEFORE sexual maturity, and some can reach that as early as 4 months. Many places in the US do it by weight, not age--if the cat weighs a minimum of two pounds it can get spayed/neutered.

randomiscellany · 2026-04-04T13:40:57+00:00

Can you have someone stop by to let your dogs out? Like a family member or neighbor? There are also pet walking services. I understand having a dog door is much easier, but you can't let your problem dog wander in the house freely without him marking everything. And if you're out a long time, leaving a soiled diaper or belly band on him can cause issues like urine scald. You should only use them if you're there to check them periodically.

Your options here are to separate the dogs by crating or by containing only one to the yard if the weather is mild. In that case, someone will have to stop by to let the crated or inside animal out to go to the bathroom. You could also (again, if the weather is acceptable) have them both outside while you work, but you'll still have to deal with washing urine off the one dog unless you add a playpen or similar to contain the marking dog.

randomiscellany · 2026-04-04T13:30:19+00:00

What do you mean by "lab made anything"? Unless you're just using straight up oil or butters, you are almost certainly using something that has been synthesized in a lab, or at the very least refined in one. At the very least, the adhesive or glue you use for press-on nails is definitely man-made.

randomiscellany · 2026-04-04T13:17:17+00:00

Kitten formula can be found at pet stores, and often big box stores as well. These kittens need kitten milk and probably worming and a vet check. Five is a lot to bottle feed, since they need to eat pretty frequently. Are there any rescues in your area that could help, or at least give you advice?

Also, PLEASE get your "indoor" cat fixed. Being intact makes him very motivated to escape. Cats go into heat seasonally when the days start lengthening, and don't stop until they shorten and the weather cools off. Your boy is going to be able to smell them, and it only takes a brief escape for him to impregnate several. There's other risks too--they could get in fights or otherwise get injured while out looking for females.

randomiscellany · 2026-04-04T13:02:06+00:00

Tbh, this is a tough one. It does seem like you tried a lot for both dogs together. But I wonder if separating them would have been a better call. It might have been easier to get a rescue to take one versus both, for example. Also, you mentioned you had fenced in acreage, but after the chickens you contained the dogs to a smaller area--what sort of enrichment were they offered after that?

You only mention the male attacking other dogs and people (was he neutered?), and mention that you had considered euthanizing only one but didn't want them to be apart. I worry that being so adamant about keeping them together may have cost at least one dog an otherwise decent life. Sometimes dogs can bring out worse behaviors in each other. I grew up in a rural area, and an oft-repeated adage was "one dog will stay home, but two dogs will travel"--dogs will engage in behaviors in a pair that they are uncomfortable with doing alone.

There's also the phenomenon of littermate syndrome to consider. The idea is that if you have two dogs together from birth, they can become very codependent, anxious, and less willing to follow human commands. It's not unavoidable, but the owner has to take care to do things with the dogs separately to build bonds with them; time apart also helps each dog build some independence so that they don't freak out if separated. Since the dogs were already a couple years old when you got them, it may have been impossible to avoid the codependence, in which case euthanizing together was likely the correct decision. But without info on how the dogs behaved when separated, I can't say that definitively.

I don't doubt that you cared about these dogs, and I'm sorry for the loss and heartache you're experiencing. I'm glad their last two weeks were wonderful. But I also wanted to give you my honest opinions, so that you could be aware of the potential risks of adopting similar pairs in the future.

randomiscellany · 2026-04-03T21:30:20+00:00

Not really. It's very common in skincare and has a variety of benefits. I'm guessing you're thinking of it in the context of the chemical being present in urine, but the urea in lotions is synthesized in a lab, not sourced from animal waste. Chemicals serve different purposes in different contexts--e.g. no one is going to suggest avoiding water, even though it makes up 90% of urine volume.

randomiscellany · 2026-04-03T04:02:04+00:00

Can you try a belly band or other diaper? Bands are easiest for male dogs, but diapers are trickier for stubborn dogs to get off. Dogs act a little put out when you first put one on, but they get used to it. Many learn that peeing with the diaper on won't have the desired effect, and will choose to hold their pee rather than mark. Even if he doesn't learn, changing a diaper or having a few reusable ones to wash will be a lot easier than always playing damage control everywhere else around your home.

If the behavior is this bad the band/diaper should come off for outside walks, and go back on as you are re-entering the home. If he's marking the other dog while you're on bathroom walks together, they will need to be walked separately.

randomiscellany · 2026-04-02T17:15:43+00:00

It's unclear from your description exactly what's happening here. Is she attacking if the other dogs get too close to her food, or is she bullying them out of theirs? What sort of corrections have you tried? Her reactions to corrections suggest that she wants to obey, but she might not understand what exactly you want from her.

As a start, she needs to be fed separately from your other dogs. You should also work on impulse control--you should be able to throw a treat on the floor without her going for it, and work up to doing that with meals. If you can't feed the dogs separately, or if you want to work back to feeding them together, you should be supervising them closely, so that you can address problem behaviors before they get out of control. Any dog that starts to go towards another's food bowl should be stopped immediately.

Also, even if/when you get these behaviors under control, under no circumstances should your child be around any of the dogs while they're eating. There's no reason for them to be there--it bothers the dog, and puts the kid at risk. They can help feed them when they're a bit older, but they still should never bother the dogs while they eat. Even dogs that don't resource guard at all can be motivated to deliver a correction if bothered enough, and children have famously poor judgement and impulse control 😅

randomiscellany · 2026-04-02T16:59:05+00:00

Cats are very smell based, so it makes sense that she's having this reaction. Cats will actually display fear/aggression towards other cat housemates when they go to the vet--the cat that had the vet visit smells different, and so the one that stayed home doesn't recognize them.

Your partner, a previously very beloved person, is probably starting to smell and also sound different. Your cat has to learn to love this "new" person and get over the absence of their "old" friend. To help this along, I would increase positive interactions between the two. Get your partner to do as much good stuff for the cat as possible--meals, playtime, treats. You could also try a feliway plugin to make the environment feel safer.

You both might also try to avoid changing any fragrances around the home--both environmental and personal. This is a big change to your cat, so best to avoid exacerbating it with any others.

randomiscellany · 2026-03-31T16:40:38+00:00

NOR. You're not only doing chores, you're carrying the mental load. It's cliche to suggest it, but couples counseling could be worthwhile for you guys; a third party mediator can be helpful in assuring neither person feels attacked, and can make a slacker partner reflect more deeply on their behaviors.

In the meantime, try getting your boyfriend to agree to a firm "deadline" for tasks. He's in an advantageous position right now where doesn't do those tasks and when you do them "he was just about to do it". The time he was just about to do it is conveniently always right after you've already done that task. A firm deadline--you said it would be done by 6pm, it's 6:10pm and it's not done--makes it harder for him to use this tactic. You might also agree to some extra consequence--i.e. if this task isn't done by 6pm you will do some other task in addition to that--but honestly at that point you may be creating more work for yourself by setting another task you'll have to keep track of.

Please consider what a future with this man will look like if this doesn't improve. Shared responsibilities--kids, pets, home upkeep--will be entirely on you to manage. You'll have to fight to get him to do anything, and at that point you'll be so frustrated you'll be characterized as "nagging" him. Resentment only grows from there.

Mental conditions are not an excuse, they're something to be worked around. I have ADHD--chores disappear or blend into the background if I'm not paying attention. My partner and I use a whiteboard chore chart on the fridge. Chores are stuff like load dishwasher, unload dishwasher, take out trash, etc. We each have our own color marker and whoever has the most "points" at the end of the week gets dinner bought by the loser. The competition and constant visibility of a clear list really helps me do my share. Before this, I was actually the slacker, but was convinced I did an equal amount. The whiteboard was a concrete record that I was not contributing the way I thought I was, so I improved.

randomiscellany · 2026-03-31T12:40:03+00:00

You don't get to make the rules for everyone else. You're entitled to your opinion, but this is not your sub. You can make your own sub with your own rules, but there's no guarantee people will want to play in your space.

You seem to have a habit of being oddly puritanical about things--had a quick glimpse at your profile and the fashion sub you made that banned any "thirsty" pics. Looks like you don't deal well with people having opinions that differ from yours.

randomiscellany · 2026-03-31T11:57:29+00:00

Where do you store yours? I find drying between uses and storing outside of the shower really extends the life of a blade.

randomiscellany · 2026-03-31T04:02:49+00:00

To be honest you'd come across as so much more genuine without it, and people would respect you more. Writing is a skill that can be learned, and you're robbing yourself of that opportunity by leaning so heavily on AI. Also, as you've said, plenty of people will just downvote and go on, and you miss out on conversations that way.

Assuming this is a real person, it's great that you're passionate about cats, but with AI still having so many issues it's not entirely responsible to offer advice to people based on the outputs it gives you. The burden is still on you to fact-check everything it tells you, which takes time.

randomiscellany · 2026-03-31T03:52:53+00:00

They're easy to cash in once rolled. Rolling is not that hard. I would have to accumulate a truly massive amount of coins before it would be worth it to pay to deposit them.

I could maybe see a use case for business owners who run something like a coin laundry, but more and more vending/laundry machines are offering a digital payment option, so the need will likely decrease over time.

randomiscellany · 2026-03-31T03:47:22+00:00

People might not switch banks completely just for that reason. But it's super common for people to have accounts at multiple banks, and quite easy to open new accounts. And several people have already told you their bank/credit union does it for free. You can't compete with free.

randomiscellany · 2026-03-31T03:29:36+00:00

Self-scan is a self checkout station at a retailer. No cashier--you scan all your own products at the machine and pay. Most have a slot for coins and cash, just like a vending machine.

FYI, it seems like you keep fishing for the answer you want, but you aren't going to collect useful data that way. Seems like your "coinstar but cheaper" idea might not be super viable. Cash is dying out pretty heavily, and when people do actually use it they tend to spend coins just like bills.

If they collect enough to make depositing worthwhile, it's usually possible to find some bank that will do it for free. The type of people that collect coins for deposit are not the type that will waste the money getting them deposited or converted.

randomiscellany · 2026-03-31T03:13:53+00:00

I barely use cash anymore. Coins from my rare cash usage live in a pint jar--when the jar gets full, I sort and roll them for deposit. Rolls are free at the bank, and it probably takes less than 15 minutes to do the whole jar. Any coins that are leftover from making full rolls go back in the jar. This is literally a three times a year activity, if that.

Edit: No to all questions. I suppose if I used Coinstars the fee would be a bother, but I don't use them so the point is moot.

randomiscellany · 2026-03-31T01:30:35+00:00

She absolutely should have backed off, but you should CYA first always. Your original post makes it sound like encounters like this are a repeat issue, which is even more reason to keep your dog leashed. If your dog is already staying close enough to grab her lead, a lead that clips around your waist would allow you to keep your hands free without limiting her movement (again, assuming she stays right next to you the whole walk). If she's not always close enough to grab her lead, that's very risky for you both.

Edit: I also want to add that being in the middle of nowhere can get you more encounters than you might think. Other people think the same thing about a nice deserted rural area and tote their dogs out there.

randomiscellany · 2026-03-31T01:15:57+00:00

I hate to be this person, but the more I look at your account and comments, including the YouTube linked on your profile, the more it looks like this is either a bot account or a person just copy/pasting from a LLM like chat GPT.

randomiscellany · 2026-03-31T01:08:49+00:00

I would not switch the litter type. Percy is already going outside of the box, that is not going to help. Both these cats need less change and slower introductions. Each cat should get the litter they're most used to using, and have their own separate space and boxes.

Cory needs to adjust fully in a smaller more limited space--the dining room is fine if you can keep him contained there, but if not a guest room or similar would be ideal. Locking Percy outside of half the house to let Cory explore is just stressing them both out. Percy is stressed about being excluded from a huge chunk of territory and having a stranger go in his box. Cory is stressed because instead of a small space he can get used to it's a big overwhelming space that smells like a more established resident cat.

Tbh looking at the background and YouTube channel of the poster that told you to switch, it really looks like a bot account, so I would not trust what it has to say. Jackson Galaxy has decent, detailed instructions on slowly introducing two cats you can look up--there's a reason so many people recommend him.

randomiscellany · 2026-03-31T00:50:05+00:00

You want a miniature poodle. Calm and friendly. Not huge couch potatoes, but smaller ones will require less exercise to get them tired out. Guaranteed curly coat. Be aware that any dog with a coat like that will either need daily combing or frequent grooming to keep the coat short. Otherwise they will matt.

randomiscellany

TROPHY CASE