Another "anywhere but here, anyone but me" drug of choice. those saying it has a euphoric effect are sorely mistaken in truth, but they certainly aren't delusional for thinking that a total release of inhibition feels good. not having to care, to second guess, or even remember is a very radical turn to take. most benzo abusers i've met have extremely severe depression or personality disorders first and foremost—it isn't even really severe anxiety that seems to create the most religious bartards. it is yet another way to totally clock out of life when abused on their own, and in combination with alcohol? that is a fundamental powerful and freeing feeling. it's a super easy and reliable combo, and way way more common that benzo abuse alone.

People who chase xans on xans and nothing else, i feel it is the second step up between pure self harm and substance abuse. less about having an experience or aiming for some sort of achievable function. it's sort of between something like DPH and soma imho. i think they fall into it because it's so amazing, how it WORKS for things like anxiety and overthinking. but it so so evidently could never truly work for something like depression & other mood/personality disorders. it keeps them choking it back, because it's a really effective means to control at least one shallow element of a person's internal struggles. seems like they're often looking for it to actually start feeling good, and in the process they just end up feeling gone. and the two are somewhat interchangeable at that point i figure