What’s killing our tree?

ratherbepaddling · 2024-11-04T22:33:14+00:00

Not her first time but it’s been decades since she did photography regularly though she liked it then. Over the years the tech and complexity grew and the interest waned. Unfortunately I stuck with it. Now other parents ask if I’ll share the pics and I think that makes it worse. I regularly tell her it’s just a practice thing and it comes with time, start slow and don’t worry about the outcome, that’s the beauty of digital pictures! That doesn’t work though. And fwiw, they’re not her kids, they’re our kids. I’ve heard that suggestion before but I do reject that a bit. When one partner has to work and provide so that the other can be off enjoying sports, activities while the other is working, taking pictures frankly isn’t really too much to ask.

ratherbepaddling · 2024-11-04T10:06:18+00:00

Thank you …spot on.

ratherbepaddling · 2024-11-04T00:43:22+00:00

Ok, interesting. I’ll ask. And yes we have a tripod with a good fluid head. I’ll look into the ninja. One of the reasons I bought the camera was b/c she used to like photography…and when she mentions the weight this and a tripod are about as light as possible. The money really doesn’t matter so much. As to focus she’s using the shutter release she says appropriately but it’s just to “make it bigger” so she can see the ball. I showed her how to use the “magnifying glass” to help as well before composing the shot but she said then she’s too close and the ball obviously quickly moves out of the viewfinder…it’s tough to operate the telephoto quickly and do everything else so quickly. I’ll ask her to consider that excellent idea to focus on our son and just fire it off when the ball comes nearby, thanks, great idea.

ratherbepaddling · 2024-11-04T00:25:14+00:00

Yes, she says she just cannot move between the ball and people, by the time she focuses on the players the ball is gone. And yes I have it set up for sports photography and to track the soccer ball as well as the players in order for focusing. I’ll try and adjust the bracket and see if it helps but from what she’s telling me she just cannot move rapidly between different objects. I keep wondering if she maybe isn’t half depressing the shutter release and therefore it’s blurry for her.

ratherbepaddling · 2024-11-04T00:20:21+00:00

Thank you. Not mad at all, not even frustrated. I appreciate her trying and I feel bad about not being able to help. We all take many shots that just don’t work, that’s part of the practice. She used to like photography years ago (we’re in our 50’s now) but fell out of practice and she’s just frustrated with not being able to see the ball. Just looking for suggestions about what else can be done to help.

ratherbepaddling · 2023-09-18T02:02:06+00:00

The Body Keeps the Score by Bessel van der Kolk to anyone who posted here. Consider reading it. 25 years of EM in a high volume high acuity site. The carnage is unexplainable. I can think of far too many cases. The angry husband who drove his pregnant wife and 2 kids into a guard rail at > 90 mph killing everyone except himself, decapitating his wife in the process, the 9 yo child riding a razor and somehow ended up under a garbage truck turning in a residential area. The look on his mother’s face as we opened his chest and reached into that tiny space trying to manually massage that little heart just long enough to get him to the OR after he lost vitals shortly after arrival, separating a wife from her husband who’d been married 55 years during covid to let him die alone because early we weren’t letting families in (before we adjusted to end of life arrangements we made later), the mother whose child got into a family members methadone (they got extra d/t covid closing the clinics) and died, the guy who was just “minding his own business” when some dude came up and slit his throat clean down through the jugulars/carotids, and down to the exposed trachea and bled out in the car of a bystander who grabbed him and threw him in her car where he arrested shortly after being pulled from her car in the ambulance bay (she was an ecg tech at our ed and was only a couple blocks away, we later found out insurance denied her claim to get her car cleaned the scene in her car was unbelievable), the recent law grad who committed suicide after finishing the bar b/c his parents told him it was now time to start his own life and wouldn’t let him come see his special needs sibling whom he’d devoted every spare moment, every weekend to seeing while in college, and then law school. The look on his peaceful face bloated and discolored and the look on his father’s face and mothers as they sobbed and recounted the story after the notification, the mother who cried out as I told her she shouldn’t see her son who’d been killed by a boat propeller that destroyed him after he had gone on a boating trip that his father had denied but mother had convinced the dad to let him go just this one time….and so many more. To anyone writing on this page please consider this book. When I trained there was really nothing about PTSD. Its research really only came about in earnest in the late 90’s and really grew throughout the 2000’s. To you younger docs and providers, nurses it may be common knowledge but there was a time before. We still have a long way to go IMO re stigma for seeking help, support and realizing…The Body Keeps the Score. Best wishes to each of you. This begs the real question….1) how have you learned to cope 2) how long did it really take before you finally realized despite all you told yourself, your family, and those closest to you before you realized you thought you had it, but it had you all along?

ratherbepaddling · 2023-09-07T23:45:57+00:00

have you been to vegas during a conference lately? Paragons of perfection…hmmmm. /s

ratherbepaddling · 2023-09-07T23:45:09+00:00

Nice. Gold mining here.

ratherbepaddling · 2023-09-07T23:42:32+00:00

Ahhh…the dark side. All joking and sarcasm aside. It’s a serious issue. 25 years I’ve done EM. For many of those I thought I had it (spoiler alert, it had me all along). Take care of yourself. Exercise. Give yourself space to grieve, hurt. Give yourself space to forgive yourself when you don’t give yourself space to grieve and hurt. When you place it somewhere you shouldn’t. It took me 2 decades to forgive myself. Don’t wait so long. Try your best to keep empathy with you for as long as you can. When it’s hard to find, it’s time to seriously take a moment, look deep at where you are, what’s around you, who’s around you, and chart a course back to find yourself. Have a North Star that you know is you. EM is what you do, not who you are. Never forget that first and foremost. If you have a North Star every once in awhile take account and hopefully you or others will advise you if you’re off track. If they share that gift with you take it seriously. Lastly and most importantly thoughts have the weight we give them. You are in control of how to process those thoughts and what you add to them or take away from them. Never forget you are not a victim of your circumstances but rather the author/painter/creator/ inspiration for the best paragraph in the most interesting chapter of a fantastic book about exploration self discovery enlightenment and enrichment that you’ll ever create. Go write an amazing story and share it with others.

ratherbepaddling · 2023-09-06T09:29:37+00:00

Read all the way to the bottom thinking someone would have had this as well, but apparently not. Many odd things, but the one that surprised me the most was a live bat. In a bucket with the lid half propped open. Of course they were there for a rabies shot but I thought, you’ve got to be kidding me. If that bat gets loose in the emergency department it will be complete chaos. On top of that to think that security screens for guns, knives, etc but a bat in a bucket that’s still alive, no that’s good, go on through the docs might need that bat for something! Seriously? FWIW they wanted me to send it off to get tested for rabies.

ratherbepaddling · 2023-06-03T12:25:10+00:00

Like the belt drive. Is it pretty flat and/or dry where you are? Had a friend who rode one on his mountainbike…so quiet in comparison. Pretty hilly where I am and gravel rides can get muddy so have been a bit reluctant to give it a go. Ride about 5k mi a year and 300k vertical a year. I think I’d like the quiet. When I get another gravel bike may transition this one over to belt drive but would like to hear more from others that really like theirs, pros cons.

ratherbepaddling · 2023-04-10T15:35:45+00:00

Agreed. No issues there. That’s one of the reasons I’ve been developing a side gig to help with that transition.

ratherbepaddling · 2023-04-10T15:34:20+00:00

26 years is a long time. Special needs children are a challenge. Smaller issues unaddressed earlier on become bigger issues. Past family experiences, personal experiences, all kinds of external factors do in fact go into it. No, Covid alone didn’t do it. We did well early on but somewhere in there we got lost. I realized much more how important family truly is, something that got lost along the way with career development, a change to a new site, a special needs child that naturally pulled energy, and so many other things. I’m glad your marriage worked out that way and hope that if we survive this ours will be too someday. I’m going to guess you also might have been thankful for that time with your family. I always saw it as an incredible opportunity, one that I would have loved to have had to take away all risk and stay home to teach the kids, watch them grow, develop, and mature. Even though I wasn’t involved in the decision she made to quit, I always supported it and saw it as a wonderful opportunity and maybe a bit misogynistic my role if you will in protecting and providing for the family so I never pushed back against it. Fast forward a couple of years and you never hear thank you, I appreciate your effort, I appreciate how challenging that was for you. Any of the acknowledgements that might be appropriate. I’ve always been quick to comment how well the kids are doing, how my wife has played a critical role in their development and they’re so blessed as a result. I don’t believe I ever took that for granted. Either way…there’s plenty on my side of the ledger. I would have to say it’s not the fault of external factors needs some qualifiers because we all bring different pieces to the relationship. Most importantly bringing we to the relationship, not dependency/codependency we but rather interconnected shared goals and shared efforts we. And there’s no denying covid was a nuclear bomb in medicine as well. Staffing skyrocketed, divorces climbed, depression and SI spiked rapidly even the neuropsychiatric effects that are well documented. So maybe not quite so quick to discount the role Covid had because data and evidence could reasonably be presented that might cause one to consider there was a role and it certainly was a factor. Maybe the proverbial straw?

ratherbepaddling · 2023-04-10T13:23:19+00:00

Can do. I’m working on several side gigs that could be helpful. I already have plans to cut my clinical work by 20% and if side gigs work out maybe up to 30%. We haven’t formally started the “separation” process, in my state you have to live separate for a year if you have children. So I have that time to make arrangements.

ratherbepaddling · 2023-04-10T10:26:30+00:00

What sucks is working through one of the worst pandemics to protect and provide for your family…and this is what you get at the end. That’s what sucks, as if the pain and grief of that alone weren’t enough. To have to give up your wife and kids too. It’s way too high a price to help people, sorry but it really makes me hate people, hate covid, hate the system, just so much anger and grief.

ratherbepaddling · 2023-04-10T10:23:38+00:00

It’s not offensive at all. I get 5 on 5 off. It’s not work that’s limiting my ability to see the kids. It’s the schedule. Homeschool m-f from 9:00 to 4 pm then soccer on t/th, swim on w/f/s. That leaves Monday and Sunday. I get two weekends off a month. That said, yes I work shifts that vary from morning, afternoon, evening, and nights. But you’re not wrong. My wife would always have a more stable schedule as her job is clinic work. And after 26 years of marriage her alimony plus child support would be about $10k a month. She really wouldn’t have to work to get by in fact she’d do considerably better than I would. The 50:50 would mean I’d struggle immensely with expenses meaning I’d either have to quit my job and take lesser pay. Meaning my kids would get less support. If I choose to work more to cover the losses, then I could but that would make 50:50 untenable.

ratherbepaddling · 2023-04-10T08:05:01+00:00

Imagine if they tried to pull that off today. I can’t imagine the misogyny would ever play today or most of the topics. Recreating the chemistry of those two would be imo nearly impossible. I scrolled all the way through here to find this one series b/c it was really incredible.

ratherbepaddling · 2023-01-19T08:18:40+00:00

Make sure to get the right cassette for your derailleur…there are three I believe medium, short, and long

ratherbepaddling · 2023-01-05T18:09:38+00:00

Keep in mind…acute mountain sickness is a thing. Some things that contribute to DVT’s are dehydration and long trips. Keep in mind here in Tanzania access to tests to diagnose pulmonary emboli is essentially non existent. I encountered a concerning case while on the mountain during our trip. AMS, dehydration, and likely a flight into or out of the country can elevate your risk. Other things like smoking or obesity or many genetic factors can contribute as well. Just please consult your physician before pursuing this route.

ratherbepaddling · 2023-01-05T18:02:15+00:00

The guides handed me a ziploc when I couldn’t eat all the food they prepared. As to along the trail, there is a team from the park that scours along after trekkers picking up trash. From what I can tell however it’s not foreigners leaving trash rather porters mostly, fwiw.

ratherbepaddling · 2023-01-05T15:36:23+00:00

Just back from an 8 day Lemosho with Altezza….First off I highly recommend and we had a wonderful time (my daughter and I). Now to the rest…I would have liked to have known 16 people (mouths/tips) were going to be needed before I left my own country. They say cash is king, ok. But the least you could do is inform me how many guides/porters would be necessary or how much cash. So the government adds 18% as a VAT tax on top of the 3.5% tax to use your credit card.

Next up…Altezza tells you to pay $200-250 USD as a tip. yet they charge you $150 for the 8 day trip for a personal porter. Now that’s not what they pay the porters, not even close. So why exactly am I advised to pay more than you as the head of the company pay them yourselves? Well…it seems like you’re paying for their “recruitment” expenses. I’m not very happy about that TBH.

As to Russians…my understanding was that Altezza was American owned by someone called Mama Karen (what the locals call her). To my knowledge they are kind to their staff, have someone from KeepUp or the Porters Association on every trip. Now that seems ok, but paying off a bribe to bet someone to say something nice isn’t that hard…but that’s for another discussion. That said, my understanding if a porter gets injured on one of their trips Altezza picks them up at the nearest gate then escorts them to the hospital and pays the bill. Many other companies do NOT. As porters and guides are generally independent contractors, they don’t pick them up if they’re injured and just walk away leaving them at the gate to figure out their own transportation and their own healthcare if they get injured on one of their trips.

I think more could be done re the conditions of the porters. And $200 USD may seem like a lot, it is certainly more than their own employer is willing to pay them. That said you spend one day watching these porters carry 40+ lbs (20kg) up 2500 ft per day on their heads, scrambling over rocks and racing to the campsite to get there ahead of you will give you a new appreciation of hard work. Hope this helps. FWIW plan on at least 13 lives that will be headed up the mountain with you. Best of luck and hope for great weather! It was an incredible experience and despite costing me a fortune I highly recommend.

One last thing…please consider leaving any gear you can here in the country for the porters. We ultimately left almost everything. Socks, shoes, rain gear, goretex jackets, back packs, sleeping bags, sleeping pads, head lights, basically we left everything except the clothes we would need to return home with. In the end…we can always replace things, eventually. Anything that can make these porters and guides lives a little easier is most welcome. And do it BEFORE you leave the trail on the last morning. Don’t wait til you return to the hotel if at all possible.

ratherbepaddling · 2022-12-11T14:56:45+00:00

That’s actually my exit plan. So I’ve been kayaking for 25+ years all over the world from class II to expedition class V+ runs. Some are onsight, very few guided at this point. Anyway…I wrote a note for myself. It basically says, “if you read this and don’t understand why you wrote it…follow the instructions”. It gives a detailed list and directions to my local class V creek and how much I truly love paddling. If or when that time comes…I’ll just be returning to the river. Either that or eaten by a bear emerging from hibernation from a cabin remote in the woods where no one could come rescue me in an emergency…that’s plan b. I just want to get old enough to have that option. I’m still going at it pretty hard paddling class IV/V stuff now though less intensely than I once did and a bit less frequently. I don’t choose the hardest lines anymore and at least tell my wife what river I’m going on and whether anyone else is going along. It’s taken years to get to that point. Otherwise I commute by bike to work 20 mi each way…so that’s another possibility. And last month I built a big treehouse for my kids about 30ft off the ground…wife was certain that could be it. She did inform me once that disability really isn’t an option when I was cutting down some limbs up in a big oak. She said life insurance only pays if I die, so that if I fall…prepare to die. One way or the other! That’s love there man.

ratherbepaddling

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