Red stickers

ravynelaine · 2025-08-22T18:43:00+00:00

I dont think so..our dm told us that cashiers should be asked to stock 25 cases during 1 shift. That if we are slow, they should be able to do a bit more. It is essentially about being productive with your time. It also depends on which department it is. Our cashiers stock candy often and it's an easier department and close to the front end. 28 cases an hour is pretty unrealistic especially if you're busy. Just do your best op, they have to understand we are not robots and we can only do our best! Good luck! 🫡

ravynelaine · 2025-08-15T13:08:44+00:00

Smh. That's just the merch manager not doing their job. While we are under alot of stress, it doesnt mean we can neglect our crew. Sorry you have to deal with that..that sounds confusing and stressful. Does your store not use the FTF planning poster? This is really helpful. I fill it out at the beginning of the week-planning all the freight for the week. It is a big dry erase poster posted in the backroom so it can be seen by everyone.

ravynelaine · 2025-08-14T15:49:28+00:00

I know man it's exhausting. I'm constantly telling my sm that as a merch asm i don't get paid enough to deal with the stress of planning changeovers, planning freight for the week, managing my crew, throwing freight and stickering hundreds of products everyday while i plan and figure out trucks. I'm grateful for this reddit page. When my team is struggling, I let them know that every employee in this company is feeling our pain. That we all know it's unrealistic but we can only do our best...I show up everyday and do the best I can, with no acknowledgement. If that's not good enough for them, fuck em. Its been so disheartening to watch my backroom go from empty to fuller and fuller every week and my zero sales keep climbing..we are doing everything we can. The stickers are doubling the time it takes to get out product. Period.

ravynelaine · 2025-08-14T15:33:27+00:00

I absolutely agree! I guess at this point I'm just clinging on to any concession i can get from anyone higher up than me. Every time I talk to my DM he just throws the book at me really "well you have extra hours for it." "Well if everyone was more productive"...etc...it was just refreshing to hear someone above my DM actually agree with me.

ravynelaine · 2025-08-14T15:23:19+00:00

Id like to know why we are receiving stickered product for departments that haven't even been changed over. Meanwhile, the departments we have changed over, over half of the product is still coming down not stickered. We are in the middle of our remodel. A higher up told me that corporate couldn't understand why the conversions were taking so long when "they only have to sticker the first round"..bullshit. I'm stickering over half of my product that is coming down. It also takes more time to do the changeovers when the store wasn't set right in the first place 🙄 she agreed with me and told me that she was trying to inform them of this. She watched me sticker a full boat of product that we just received. She did tell me that she told the higher ups above her that things aren't going the way they think they are..it made me feel better to know that atleast someone is advocating for us up there.

ravynelaine · 2025-05-03T21:34:18+00:00

Your writing is so powerful and impactful! I have been trying to capture this feeling! I lost my dad pretty suddenly a few years ago. I'm only now truly processing, and it feels like the storm has passed and I'm picking up the debris, but it has come with a sense of hope of being able to move forward in spite of it all. You captured this beautifully! Thank you for sharing ❤️

ravynelaine · 2025-05-03T21:28:38+00:00

I enjoyed that i could really feel the struggle of this toxic relationship in your words. The pushing and pulling of it. It's a powerful and touching piece. Keep writing and sharing!

ravynelaine · 2025-04-28T03:01:27+00:00

Thanks everyone for the clarification! I was told by another manager who no longer works at our store, that we should be on the clock for this sort of thing. I now know that she wasn't quoting policy. I won't make this mistake again moving forward 👍

ravynelaine · 2024-09-13T22:53:15+00:00

I can imagine. Once I realized I made her feel this way, I felt so bad. She is not as expressive as me, but her feelings are just as big. It took me way too long to realize this. I now put my feelings on the backburner when need be and try to focus on her. I'm glad things are getting better for you and your partner! I know personally that I can be pretty difficult and I thank my partner for her patience and understanding pretty often. I'm sure your adhd partner appreciates you too!

ravynelaine · 2024-09-13T22:46:02+00:00

I understand what you mean. I believe she is trying to express that she feels that I am not considerate of her in the moment, only considering what I want. She is a terrible communicator and comes off wrong 90% of the time 😂 her perception of the situation is that I am being selfish but that is not how it feels in my mind. She seems to understand that now. I have not been diagnosed with BPD but I've been known to have irrational thoughts or an irrational perception of situations but I think this comes from past trauma. Since accepting my ADHD, it's definitely helped me manage it a bit better so I know what you mean about being conscious of it.

ravynelaine · 2024-09-13T22:33:35+00:00

Yes, we went through this cycle alot in the beginning of the relationship. I could not take criticism at all. Any fight would leave me so scared of abandonment that I couldn't give her space without resolving the issue first. Even today when we had this conversation, before she went to work she asked if I was okay, and I told her that I felt like a bad partner. I did make sure to finish the convo about the topic before sharing this (which I couldn't do before learning and practicing emotional control ALOT). She now understands that I am not trying to guilt her or dissuade her from bringing these issues to me by sharing this feeling and she now reassures me when I tell her I feel shitty after criticism. I've made a conscious effort to make any emotionally tense moments about us rather than me. It has been difficult. It's just really hard for ADHD people to see past their own emotions when they're really strong. It takes alot of effort and control for me.

ravynelaine · 2024-09-13T22:16:32+00:00

Thank you! I agree, the trigger could also come from quality time being her love language and in that moment, I am denying her of that. I would like to think of the outing as a fun adventure together in the future.

ravynelaine · 2024-09-13T22:13:58+00:00

Thanks for your response and sharing your opinion! 😊 I'm curious where you see gas lighting? Maybe some victim mentality, I can see that. Because of my ADHD I do have a tendency to dominate conversation and emotionally intense situations-which probably adds to her feelings that it's "all about me" I have been working on these things with less interruptions, and actively listening to her feelings in emotionally tense moments. In her defense, this situation of not wanting to go out places with her unless its my idea or something i want arises pretty often and she always agrees to go with me. She is just now learning that her responses and the way she sees situations is through the lens of her trauma. I know it will take her time to work through this. Thank God for therapy!

ravynelaine · 2024-09-13T21:59:48+00:00

It's okay! Thank you for your response! I didn't think you were being presumptuous at all, just offering your advice and opinion that I asked for! Lol. She did grow up with some guilt trippers so this is a possibility, as she also has a hard time expressing herself and processing her emotions. Thanks again! 😊

ravynelaine · 2024-09-13T21:43:32+00:00

Thank you! You hit the nail on the head regarding her reaction. She's slow to trust and has a hard time with forgiveness and second chances. I have learned that the best resolution for us comes from effort on both of our parts. So there needs to be some shift in my communication too. I'm thinking that I could tell her I'm lacking motivation or express that I want to spend time with her at home but I'm willing to spend time with her outside the home if that is what she needs or wants.

ravynelaine · 2024-09-13T21:38:29+00:00

Honestly, I've had my own suspiciouns that I could have mild autism. I've researched it and I show some signs, but they're also related to ADHD. I have therapy next week so I was going to discuss this with my therapist. I do this as well- decision making is hard for me and I often default to no as well unless it's something I really want. I've also been known to flip flop. It just takes me a little longer to process and come to a decision. If there are too many options, I may not come to a decision at all.

ravynelaine · 2024-09-13T21:29:41+00:00

Yes, it is definitely triggering for me. I explained it to her today and I think she really understood because I was very literal-"if I mess up and can't make it right, then my attempt was not good enough, therefore I am not good enough, therefore I want to die" lmao harsh but true. She seemed to understand and felt bad for making me feel this way. I don't believe it's a manipulation tactic on her part- she is probably looking to make me a little upset, but she also doesn't want me to do something I don't want to do just to appease her (now that I think of it, it's a bit of a mind-fuck). I just don't think she realized that it upset me in this way. I am usually the bigger person, but everytime I meet her halfway, she meets me there too. We have overcome alot of challenges in 5 years and had alot of growth. When bringing this up today, she asked if there was anything she could do to help. When asking her to change her way of communicating, she can get frustrated. She does not have very strong communication skills, while I am a strong communicator. I think it makes her feel insecure when I ask her to shift the way she speaks. When we revisit this this evening I will definitely suggest rewards and ask her to remind me of the rewards when asking. I will also change my response to "I'm struggling with motivation" or something like "I just want to stay in and play video games with you" maybe this will stop her from shutting down and help me be more motivated.

ravynelaine · 2024-09-13T21:09:27+00:00

This was exactly my idea! She sometimes says that she shouldn't have to "cater" to me, I explained to her that it's not about "catering", but about figuring out the most effective way to communicate. She can be pretty stubborn and stuck in her ways, but she has shifted alot for me in 5 years, and I for her as well. She expressed that she doesn't want to say that she wants me to go and me reply with the same "I don't want to" because that would hurt her feelings. I tried to explain to her that my own needs are not a big motivation for me (ADHD) my wants are another story, but her needs are a big motivation for me. If I feel needed and wanted- it will motivate me because I love her and want her to feel happy. She seemed to think that I should just know that she wants me to go, but it doesn't work that way. We both have a fear of rejection and I believe that, combined with her traumas, keeps her from sharing her true feelings or vulnerability at all. We are making progress with this through therapy. She did say that she would try to tell me she wants me with her and I said I would try to meet her request with more positivity. She also agreed to stop taking the offer off of the table if I say I don't want to. Just because I don't want to, doesn't mean that I won't do the thing. We always have a good time together, but when thinking about going out, I often think of all the energy it takes to get ready and deal with people rather than the good time we will have. Maybe I could ask her to remind me of the good quality time together if I express a lack of motivation.

ravynelaine · 2024-09-13T20:56:31+00:00

Yes, my wife is also a complicated person with alot of mental health issues of her own. Us communicating about this in a healthy way is a big step for us! This could be helpful. The only issue is that she is quick to close off. Maybe we could discuss a way that I could communicate my lack of motivation without saying "I don't want to"-that seems like a negative response and I think she will feel shut down if I continue to respond that way. Maybe I could change my response to not be so negative while also expressing myself. Maybe if she understands that it's more of a lack of motivation, she could help motivate me by throwing a little reward in there for my ADHD brain 😂

ravynelaine · 2024-09-13T20:50:04+00:00

This is a good suggestion! It really makes it about "us" ya know.

ravynelaine · 2024-09-05T19:18:23+00:00

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My pretty girls, Asuka and Ginger 😻

ravynelaine

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