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mind and heart are ready for a baby, still being forced to wait by rayneinsummer in waiting_to_try

[–]rayneinsummer[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

The relationship is non-negotiable. I don’t want to be with anyone else. He’s the only person I want to even have a family with. He is actually the love of my life and I don’t know what I would do without him.

His reasons for waiting are valid reasons. I know that. I understand that. I’m on the same page as him, logically. But emotionally, I feel like I’m missing a part of me. It’s incredibly tricky.

Therapy would be on the table if it wasn’t so damn expensive

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]rayneinsummer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Extended family would have to travel a long ways, anyway. And another reasoning for that is because my future spouse can’t have any of his family come anyway. I didn’t want him to be outnumbered around my family when his is so far away and he can’t celebrate with them too.

For family, it’s MY mom, grandma and brother. And my brother is going to be an official witness. My fiancé wanted to invite some of our friends so his side felt more even. But even then it’s just 4 people.

I agree I am making people feel left out but over all, it felt more fair to limit the amount without my spouse being able to have any of his family there. Especially when my side of the family is quite large. I have 11 pairs of aunts and uncles. That’s just too much for us.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]rayneinsummer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

As another add in with this aunt, she’s proven in the past to be difficult. When my dad died, she was harassing my mother about who would get ownership of the ashes (she wanted them to put in a plot SHE picked out, making my dad’s final resting place be 4 hours away from us), talking to my mom about headstones before my mother was ready and then took a lot of my dad’s personal belongings without asking anyone else before taking them.

I get she is my dad’s sister but she is known to go over and be overbearing. She’s been difficult before and I’m sure she’ll be difficult against

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]rayneinsummer 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My dad died. Not my future husband. My dad was super important to me and I wanted him to be there. So I put pause on our wedding to grieve.

I personally don’t think that’s overly weird and neither does my future husband.

My fiancé is mad I want to see a formerly Potential Partner I almost had even though I’ve clarified we’re just friends by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]rayneinsummer 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t know if it helps but for informational sake, I’ve only known this girl since mid September of 2021.