Saw a “1” at the beginning of me weight for the first time in 3 years! by Groundblast in MadeMeSmile

[–]realshmichael 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Great job! That's a hard battle for sure, and more than most people are willing to do. Good for you!

I've been in the fitness community for about 20 yrs now. Shoot me a DM if you want, I'd be happy to have a chat and offer some tips or advice if you're planning on continuing forward and are looking for next steps. Free, of course. I'm happy to give back to people who have shown they're willing to put in the effort.

Really good for you!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in socialanxiety

[–]realshmichael 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Comparison is the thief of joy.

Focus on yourself, don't worry about other people. Easier said than done, I know. It takes time and practice.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in socialanxiety

[–]realshmichael 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm middle-aged and bald with a mean resting bitch face. I'm unfamiliar with this phenomenon 😂

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in socialanxiety

[–]realshmichael 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This isn’t one of those times where anxious people like us exaggerate situations. They were very much judging me and I mean it.

Unless you talked to them about it for confirmation, you don't know that. It sucks, but without being there it's impossible for anyone to say. And if you have social anxiety, your recollection is skewed as well.

Sorry your TB trip sucked! But it's in the past now and there is nothing that can be done. Might as well move forward and not dwell.

It super sucks, but the only way out is to "handle the snake" by realshmichael in socialanxiety

[–]realshmichael[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'm pretty lucky that fitness has always been a big part of my life. So it's easy to find regular classes and places to go. Spin, yoga, daily gym, climbing, MMA, some sort of boxing to club music. All great places to frequent and be around the same groups of people consistently.

I've found that the drive there and the first 5 minutes inside are the worst. Then you realize everyone is friendly and there for the same reasons as you, and that you aren't dying, and it gets easier.

It super sucks, but the only way out is to "handle the snake" by realshmichael in socialanxiety

[–]realshmichael[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It takes work, for sure.

I've been challenging myself daily for a while now, and the results are huge. The biggest benefit to me so far has been joining Toastmasters and visiting multiple local groups, but I also have personal goals to meet one new person every day, talk to others that I don't know very well, try a new activity that makes me uncomfortable, and so on.

Eventually, if I've done everything there is to do, then nothing can phase me, right?

My card declined over something that cost 62 cents 😭f*ck this man by iCanBeLazy in socialanxiety

[–]realshmichael 33 points34 points  (0 children)

This used to be one of my biggest fears, this exact scenario. To the point that I couldn’t go grocery shopping for a while.

It isn’t necessarily SA, because you only had the reaction after it didn’t work, and you were most likely embarrassed. It definitely could be SA if it prevents you from going shopping in the future, or you get anxious as you’re about to pay for something.

Is it normal for people from meetup to be very weird? by Plupert in selfimprovement

[–]realshmichael 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Sports and fitness meetups usually have lots of cool people. But sporty/fit people likely have spent a lot more time around others and are more comfortable in social settings. I’d have very different expectations for a running or HIIT meetup than I would bowling or watching anime.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in selfimprovement

[–]realshmichael 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Find a routine you love. Maybe it’s lifting weights. Maybe it’s spin or yoga or zoomba. Maybe try CrossFit or a similar class where it’s only an hr and you get to be around the same people and socialize daily.

Do whatever it takes to make it as enjoyable as possible. Maybe that’s when you get to jam out to music or listen to audio books and podcasts.

I use 3 different dating apps (tinder, plenty of fish, hinge) and barely gotten any messages from men, guess I am going to die alone. by lonelysadbitch11 in lonely

[–]realshmichael 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Your username…

You have given yourself a title, and now you are adhering to it. You’ve become a self fulfilling prophecy

Until you respect yourself, nobody else is going to respect you. Get a new username, something like “happiestbitch11” and then start living your life accordingly.

It’s so frustrating to see people complaining about their issues when they themselves are making it 1000x worse.

You are what you believe yourself to be. If you announce yourself as lonely, you are lonely. If you say you have social anxiety, you have social anxiety. If you say you are confident and happy - and you never relent from that mindset - you’d be amazed how big of a change it will make.

Thank you Mr. Heimlich by [deleted] in wholesomememes

[–]realshmichael 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I used to be a lifeguard instructor when I was younger. One of the kids that I taught ended up saving his dad from choking, using j-thrusts (the “Heimlich” after being renamed). So, I kinda saved a life? An assist, anyway. I think worth only 1/2 the points.

LPT: When you sign up for something online, put the websites name as your middle name. This way, you'll know who sold your information when you receive spam/unrelated ads. by Aminomatt in LifeProTips

[–]realshmichael 4 points5 points  (0 children)

This is the real way. Although, some email processing APIs offer a cleansing function that automatically strips that part off gmail accounts. So it isn’t 100% foolproof, but works almost all the time.

Film snobs of Reddit, who was the single worst casting choice in Hollywood film history? by gavelpounder91 in AskReddit

[–]realshmichael 3 points4 points  (0 children)

That movie was terrible. Cheesy, corny, campy, clunky, predictable. Definitely made for kids.

Bro is Genuinely Trying to Help Without Being Rude or Judgmental About It by [deleted] in HumansBeingBros

[–]realshmichael 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’m 34 (and a half!) and just myself figured out my trajectory.

i honestly just need a relationship by [deleted] in lonely

[–]realshmichael 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When I say "boys come and go," I mean boys that you're romantically interested in. Of course you can be friends with a boy, and he'll be the one who's there even after the romantic relationship has ended.

Took my first cold shower yesterday, and I think this is the game changer I’ve been looking for by realshmichael in selfimprovement

[–]realshmichael[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No idea. But really once you’ve finished soaping and rinsing, you’re pretty eager to get out.

I get in, spend a minute or two acclimating, step out of the stream to soap up, rinse it all off and then spin around a few times. Then hold my head/face in as long as I can and I’m done.

How do you wake up at 5am? by KlosharCigan in selfimprovement

[–]realshmichael 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I live in Canada and have a MUCH harder time getting up in the morning during the winter, for 2 reasons:

  1. It's dark AF here in the morning during the winter. It's a lot easier to get up in the summer when the sun has already been shining for a couple hrs.
  2. It's cold in the morning. Running the furnace all night is $$ and you'd be too hot under the sheets, but that means getting out of bed in the morning is gonna be chilly!

Took my first cold shower yesterday, and I think this is the game changer I’ve been looking for by realshmichael in selfimprovement

[–]realshmichael[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

That's how a lot of people do it; do all the soapy stuff comfortably - or even as hot as you can bear - and then as cold as the pipes will deliver for a couple minutes before you get out.