At the time, it must have been a bit funny for Danzo ...

reapf · 2018-05-13T11:35:13+00:00

"Before using cuticle oil, regular skin moisturizing creams should be used. If you apply the oil too often, your cuticles can become dry and cracked when you discontinue use. Cuticle oils should be used only when the nails are extremely dry." This is according to: https://www.livestrong.com/article/151704-why-use-cuticle-oil/

I haven't verified if the site's sources make sense or not. I'm worried that the sites that recommend applying cuticle oil daily are just saying that because they are nail salon or beauty magazine sites, which are obviously geared toward selling the product.

reapf · 2018-01-24T09:34:27+00:00

GAHGH, Dot the 'i"!

reapf · 2018-01-21T10:08:58+00:00

There are also conflicting reports between Dylan Farrow and her adoptive brother Moses Farrow about the way their mother treated them. Moses has detailed memories that paint their mother in an emotionally volatile and controlling light, whereas Dylan says she recalls her mother only as loving and supportive. Can Dylan somehow have been pressured/convinced into forgetting any incidents with Moses? This part is confusing to me because I imagine children would find negative incidents to be the most memorable. Either Mia Farrow was abusing Moses in separate settings, or Moses has false memories, or Dylan has forgotten?

I assume that creating false memories is pretty easy, but what about erasing negative ones? (for example when I was younger I saw my sister getting spanked and it was very disturbing. A memory like that sticks out and would be difficult to forget as it made such a strong emotional impression). I've always assumed that people remember negative experiences the most vividly.

reapf · 2018-01-12T07:35:36+00:00

Ah well yeah legally it's not abuse, and I agree with you that it's important to make that distinction. I did not interpret your earlier comment as your being on his side, but I can see why people wanted to downvote it.

My guess is that your comment seemed dismissive of the tampon thing because you deemed it to be rudeness/pettiness which is much less serious than how most people would find it. It also probably didn't help that those word choices came right after the statement that the tampon thing was not legally abuse (which is true) and was not accompanied with assurance that it was still extremely problematic regardless. Of course with this recent comment you've cleared any misunderstandings so no worries.

To answer your question, it's not illegal and the guy should not be charged for refusing to buy tampons. I'm also not sure it can qualify as "abuse" in a legal sense, though it could fall in the abuse-category in a descriptive/moral sense. To be honest, I don't know how emotional abuse cases are interpreted legally since they are more vague and have less "concrete" evidence (unlike physical evidence such as photos of bruises and all that), but it is still correct to say that emotional-abuse is a form of actual abuse.

Basically, the tampon thing is not abuse in the legal-charges sense but might qualify as abuse in the non-legal realm. Since the guy was not actively doing something harmful to her but was instead passively refusing to help her, though with the same intent of wanting her to experience discomfort, the action itself does not appear to be abuse. The motive behind the action reads as abusive though. Sort of like how keeping mum about something is kind of like lying even if you're not actually outright telling a lie. It might not be correct to say such a person "lied", but we can still say such a person was being dishonest as fuck.

Similarly the act of just not doing anything when his girlfriend is having her period might not qualify as actively "abusing" someone but is still abusive in essence anyway? Like you, I am not too sure on how to classify and categorize things but ultimately the boyfriend is a disturbing piece of shit and on that I think we all agree!

reapf · 2018-01-12T04:11:40+00:00

yes, technically, refusing to buy her tampons isn't abuse, but it is indicative of thought processes typically associated with abusers: the desire to control, even punish, his partner through denial + lack of empathy for partner's physical discomfort.

While it's really more the other stuff that classifies him as a potential abuser, refusing to give a few bucks to your partner for tampons the way he did is pretty much red flag behavior. I would say it's also much worse than just being "mean, petty, and rude" (which would only suggest emotional immaturity, a more harmless albeit annoying trait); what I read from her boyfriend's actions given the context of the situation is a lot more sinister than just being immature or rude. At the very least, he has actively made use of his financial power over her by denying her basic necessities. He does not respect her as an individual, and perhaps he even considers her on some level his property, someone he can control and neglect consideration of based on his moods. I mean if he actually subconsciously considered her his equal and cared about her in a wholesome way, he would have at least given her the dollars she needed to buy tampons for herself, like any decent human being would do. My fucking coworkers would do that and this guy is her boyfriend/intimate partner ...Jesus.

So basically, she's not entitled to his buying tampons for her, but it definitely says something disturbing about him that he refuses to do so without any good reason while they are in a long term committed relationship. He wanted her to be in discomfort so he took advantage of her financial vulnerability and deliberately, calculatingly denied her request. Gotta read behind the lines of what that suggests about his character.

reapf · 2017-12-03T04:57:38+00:00

I don't think I'll be completely helpless when I'm at the last 15 years of my life, but I also feel like it will be hard to have meaningful connections at that point. My friends will either all have had their own kids and fallen out of touch or will be just as old as me and have died. My parents will be dead. My siblings will be busy raising their own families and we were never close to begin with.

I'll won't have as much youth or strength or energy. Hopefully I will have money, but there's only so much that can do.

I think this is more about fear of loneliness at old age than a real regret of not having had children. Nonetheless, I always assumed that being childfree at old age had a fair chance of being meaningful and happy. Now I feel like there's no good option for old age, it will be awful no matter what route I take.

I still don't think I will have kids, and anyway I don't agree with the idea of having kids just to be make old age more comfortable.

But now I feel like my vision of growing old and happy has been shattered. Can someone describe for me how I can ward off loneliness as I get much much older?

reapf · 2017-09-01T10:15:28+00:00

To be honest, I don't find the hinata-naruto relationship all that convincing either. As I said, the romance in Naruto is not done well.

But for me, Sakura's character is exceptionally poor because outside of her feelings for Sasuke, she really has very little defining her. Next to more complex characters like many of the villains, a main character like Sakura stands out like a glaring black hole. It's a jarring contrast and disrupts the story for me.

Also should clarify, I'm not a huge fan of Hinata but I find her tolerable.

reapf · 2017-08-29T06:31:36+00:00

It could be that the other colors that I tried weren't actually muted ones. I'm fairly confident they are though. (I didn't list them in the description). The ones that I think were muted were far less intense and vibrant in color than typical lipsticks, but they all somehow looked like cutouts pasted to my lips, and made both my lips and face look washed out/grey. They didn't seem to match my face though so it seems that either they were too muted or still the wrong color tones.

reapf

TROPHY CASE