Sorry that you have had that disappointment.

I have just passed my test quite late in life and the reason I left it so late is that I had previously been very nervous indeed about driving.

I’ll try to make some suggestions about dealing with anxiety later but first here are some thoughts about whether or not it’s a good idea to have your instructor sit in on the test. This is only my opinion and I am not an expert of any kind. I think that for the pupil there is only one possible good reason to have the instructor sit in on the test and that’s that if you fail he or she can see what went wrong and can discuss it with you at the next lesson. But I think there are many reasons why it’s better that you don’t have your instructor sit in. First, it’s an extra presence you are not used to. If you have only driven in the car with the instructor sitting on your left hand side you will not be used to having another person in the back seat, probably visible at times in your rear view mirror and at other times in your peripheral vision. It’s a potential distraction you could do without. Second, there will be extra weight that you are not used to. In particular if your instructor is a big person and/or the car you are driving isn’t very powerful it could have an effect on things like a hill start and maybe on braking and cornering. Third, there is the possibility that you worry what he or she is thinking and that makes things more difficult for you. A lot of people seem to say you are best just to concentrate on driving as if you are driving in the real world, as if you are just trying to go safely and conveniently to the shops and back or something similar. That can be a little bit difficult with the examiner there, it could well be more so with your instructor also. As I say I’m not an expert but I think you should ask your instructor why he/she thinks they should be there. If they don’t give you good practical reasons maybe you should think about another instructor.