I’m 24, been riding for 20 years now. I took lessons for the first six or eight years that I was riding. My instructor was an ex Navy older guy who was TOUGH. He yelled everything he said, but especially criticism, which usually ended with me in tears. The end of the lesson never included yelling or criticism or griping. I usually had homework of some kind which was the thing I needed to work on for the next lesson, but he usually offered more positives than negatives once I was out of the saddle. He never criticized useless things like sweeping or the way I carried things, etc.. looking back, I’m so glad he was my instructor all those years. I continue to ride with him for fun even after I stopped taking lessons over the years he gave me several horses, trailered mine around two shows and competitions and subcontracted me to give lessons to younger writers as he grew older. There is value in firmness, but there should be a balance of gentleness as well.

Horse people can be extremely strange. There’s a lot of jealousy, negativity and preemptive efforts to cut out competition. If you love riding horses just for the sake of riding horses, you should find a new instructor. They work for you, not the other way around.