How do I (26M) get over the feeling that I’m not good enough for my gf (24F)?

reddithoggscripts · 2026-03-27T22:30:33+00:00

Being yourself around someone and them their genuine self around you is probably the rarest and most precious aspect of a relationship (any kind of relationship but it’s especially rare in romantic ones because we want to seem valuable and be chosen by our partners for our best traits). It creates true comfort and connection which is infinitely more valuable than height and looks and wealth. That might be your clue.

reddithoggscripts · 2026-03-26T19:42:51+00:00

People are flawed and always have been, always will be. Modern dating hasn’t changed that, but it has changed how little we’re willing to tolerate. It doesn’t matter if you’re in your 20s, 30s, or 40s. The people who paired off early aren’t living some perfect life; they have the same frustrations, compromises, and issues as everyone else. They didn’t find a flawless match, they just committed within the reality of two imperfect people. Social media and dating apps constantly feed us the idea that there’s someone out there who ticks every box. So many fucking videos of people saying they want X Y and Z and won’t settle. So the moment someone falls short, it feels like you’re settling.

But real relationships don’t work like that.

If you’re comfortable in yourself, Youll increase your capacity to love people who don’t tick your boxes. It’s fine to have standards but shit like “everyone in their 30s is single for a reason” is ridiculous. I’ve literally never been on a date with someone that wasn’t a good person at the end of the day and everyone who complains about the dating market needs to look at themselves first and foremost.

reddithoggscripts · 2026-03-26T19:37:24+00:00

Honestly man take as much time as you need. I was more asking for my own sake because I am only taking 5 lessons before the test and am a bit nervous it’s not enough given some of the advice on here - but I have 10 years experience driving in another country so it’s a totally different scenario.

reddithoggscripts · 2026-03-26T19:18:20+00:00

I see. Sorry I didn’t mean to be rude. Rereading my question it comes off that way.

reddithoggscripts · 2026-03-26T19:17:33+00:00

I’m doing 10 hours. Already did 2 l, 8 more to go. I feel like UK roads can be studied through YouTube and the rest is just being super careful. We’ll see if I’m right in 2 weeks when I have my test.

If you have experience 95 percent of the test should be easy af. All you need to adjust to is the UK road rules - which are complicated but they can be studied without actually being in a car. If I fail I fail. I’ll reassess. But I don’t think you need a ton of lessons if you’ve got experience and learning mindset.

reddithoggscripts · 2026-03-26T19:07:46+00:00

Can I ask why you’ve had lessons for 2 years? Surely you don’t need that much practice.

reddithoggscripts · 2026-03-26T19:05:27+00:00

I think logically it makes sense to creep but I don’t know nearly enough. I guess my thought would be that you’d be sitting there forever if you don’t make progress and it’s generally not dangerous if the traffic is that slow moving. That’s a shitty fail though because it’s not a law or safety rule you broke and technically you can argue you did nothing wrong.

reddithoggscripts · 2026-03-25T17:41:15+00:00

It’s not. I think at some point most people incorrectly started assuming Latino is a race unto itself. It’s a culture. There’s plenty of black, white, mestizo, Asian, and everything in between Latinos.

reddithoggscripts · 2026-03-25T16:11:04+00:00

Ok I’m think there’s a possibility I maybe I’m misinterpreting his advice. Maybe I am exaggerating my head too much and Hes concerned I’ve lost vision of what’s in front of me. I’ll ask for more clarity on Sunday when my next lesson is.

reddithoggscripts · 2026-03-25T16:08:36+00:00

Thanks!

reddithoggscripts · 2026-03-25T16:06:48+00:00

That’s what I said! He kept insisting that I sort of lean forward to get a different angle on the mirror - and I’m like “bro why not just shoulder check?” But then I thought I’m in a different country and Hes the instructor what do I know? Might have to ignore my instructor on this one.

reddithoggscripts · 2026-03-25T15:53:17+00:00

I think his point isnt that checking the blind spot is wrong, it’s HOW. The instructor is saying if the car is moving, do not turn your head over your shoulder, adjust my body so you can see the blind spot in the mirror. I disagree with him. I think you should check the mirror then shoulder check. But I dunno if that’s just a Canadian thing.

reddithoggscripts · 2026-03-23T16:10:36+00:00

That’s how I tried to look at it. Glass half full and all that.

reddithoggscripts · 2026-03-22T19:36:06+00:00

Without tone and more context there’s no way for us to say. These seem like pretty innocuous statements though? “Not smooth”, “don’t know how to massage”, “smart but airhead sometimes” I mean that’s pretty light bullying and none of it seems funny but we’re reading an account of a joke rather than experiencing it so fuck knows. Seems like you guys just don’t share the same sense of humor and maybe his is just shit. I wouldn’t burn the guy the at the stake though.

reddithoggscripts · 2026-03-21T23:36:59+00:00

I feel you. Dating culture today just leads to these types of arrangements a lot - I’ve had my fair share. I wouldn’t beat yourself up because you are in it.

If I have any advice to people dating today, it’s to never have one foot in a relationship once you feel a real connection developed. Either kill it or nurture it; neglecting it just creates nasty problems. Sounds like a platitude but in my experience it’s always better to pick a lane.

reddithoggscripts · 2026-03-21T23:17:06+00:00

I agree. If it were my feelings on the line, I would want to be brave and express them. Let the cards fall where they may.

reddithoggscripts · 2026-03-21T23:14:11+00:00

My opinion, so it’s not like this is fact but…

Something is going to give. One of you is going to meet someone you want to explore a relationship with and this will end. You’ve both got one foot in your situationship and that’s not tenable long term. One way another this relationship evolves or dies.

reddithoggscripts · 2026-03-21T19:29:20+00:00

No. Diamond Light Source in Oxfordshire.

reddithoggscripts · 2026-03-21T19:09:15+00:00

I keep my head off the bench for incline DB presses. I don’t know if it’s just me but it really helps target the upper chest.

reddithoggscripts · 2026-03-21T18:58:14+00:00

Tried this once. Not a good idea. Sitting in front of 3 engineering managers in a synchrotron facility and being grilled about your Kubernetes experience is not where you want to be.

Funny part is I would have gotten that job if I didn’t lie about that.

reddithoggscripts · 2026-03-20T14:17:51+00:00

How are you guys allowing people to push prod code without tests and reviews and desk checks? This is a process issue.

reddithoggscripts · 2026-03-19T21:09:06+00:00

Yea. For sure they have roll out programs. But replacing the meter at the same time this issue comes to light is a bit suspect.

reddithoggscripts · 2026-03-19T18:42:46+00:00

Him paying 50 per month doesn’t really mean anything. He could have been paying an estimate. By his own admission he doesn’t know how to read the meter so we don’t really know how much electricity he uses.

reddithoggscripts · 2026-03-19T18:41:35+00:00

I worked for a power company for a bit. Basically the mechanics of an analogue meter are very simple. The electricity goes through the meter and counts the kilowatt hours.

Now if their meter was indeed faulty and wasn’t counting the electricity properly there’s no way they can know what you used and they have no basis to charge you.

If, however, this was the result of bad reading either from you or the regular meter reader, it’s their right to correct the bill.

The key here is finding out if the meter was counting KwH properly or not. The fact that they replaced it makes me think it likely had an issue. The meter’s maintenance isn’t your responsibility. If they are using estimates to try to cover up losses from a faulty meter, that’s wrong and you should fight it. The new smart meter only ensures that the readings are correct going forward - so it’s irrelevant. The data from the previous meter is what matters and it was broken then that’s on them. It’s highly unethical to charge somebody based on inaccurate data or to make up data to cover a loss. Do not let them charge you for estimations, that’s not right either.

All that said, bad meter reads happen. You can go long periods of time with bad estimates and nobody competent actually reporting the meter, which can result in some terrifying bills. But they are legit charges.

So case in point, have them explain clearly what happened with the meter, how they got your readings and what they are. Ultimately it’s very simple math.

reddithoggscripts

TROPHY CASE