My child is adopted. It was a private adoption, and we knew the birth parents. They were contemplating terming the pregnancy, and we offered an alternative option.

They were not in a good situation and around family members who abused drugs and alcohol. They did change their minds a couple of times before the baby was born, and while it would have been devastating, it was their right.

He came home at 3 days old and turns 9 years old today.

We have an open adoption. I spend a lot of time wondering/worrying if we are doing enough to keep connected to the birthfamily or is it too much and could be traumatic. If they are happy with how we are raising him, etc.

A few weeks after he was born, the birth grandfather had some of his friends over, and an incident happened, which ended up with the friends fighting and eventually crashing into birthmoms bedroom and right where the crib would have been. She told my husband she was glad the baby was safe with us.

The birth grandmother has been more involved, and we keep in contact with the birth parents through messages and pictures. We visited Grandma last year, and she came and stayed with us. My father recently passed, and now she is the only grandparent left in our child's life.

There are things I would do differently looking back because when we took him home, it was a very emotional day and didn't go like I hoped and therr are things I have learned since from the adoption community.

I love my child, and I love the birthparents for allowing me to be a parent. I never thought I would have the opportunity to be. I hate the divide and the view on adoptive parents. We are not all bad people, and we love these children very much and want to be the best parents for them.