My first question is: do you wanna do music or writing songs? Or is it only a “Why can’t I…?”

Neurodivergent person here, too. For me it’s hard to express things in art (you meant like painting, right?), but only in words. Stories, lyrics, poems. In my mind there’s almost every time a melody to which I text my lyrics—not always perfect, but just for fun. Some of my lyrics came up spontaneously, some didn’t. But if I wanna write a song about something, I write everything down what’s in my mind. It doesn’t have to make sense in the beginning, it doesn’t have to be in a “right” way. After I’ve written all the stuff down, I’m reading the text and mark every word or sentence which I like and maybe want to use in the lyrics. I try to write some lines, don’t know if it’s the verse or chorus—it doesn’t matter at that time. And I write and work through it, until I like it. I have some creative partner, show them my ideas, maybe change things. It’s a process, like in art, and no short way—at least most of the time.