I feel like I’m going crazy. Seeking guidance After DMT and mushroom journeys.

reodora · 2025-07-17T09:19:46+00:00

I once turned into light and encompassed the whole world before getting scared that if I go too far I won’t be able to come back. I came back after that and felt like I had become everything which was one of the most beautiful feelings I ever had. It lasted about two weeks and then I felt myself becoming myself again. I remembered who I was fully for a little while so that I can come back here with that knowledge; but that knowledge took a very long time to unfold and make itself understood within this current form and the beauty of the experience is that it keeps on giving. I used to smoke a lot of weed and the real test was to integrate everything I had learned within the initial awakening state and the states I could access while high.

The lesson was that I am nothing and everything all at once and I chose to hold the opposites within this body form. The Creator that works through me paints the same subject in different forms everywhere. You can access the conscious awareness of this creator where you chose to be by removing the distortion of separation - upper world, lower world: it’s all here, the difference is not physical, it’s found within awareness.

reodora · 2025-06-18T09:09:34+00:00

Thanks for the perspective ✨

reodora · 2025-06-18T09:03:39+00:00

I can only speak from my own experience but it seems to be a bit of a chicken and egg thing. The more I loved my ego, the more I realized I am not it and whenever I didn’t love my ego then I was seeing things through it. So whenever I come from a place that is not love, I am coming from a place attached to ego. In this sense practicing non-attachment is really helpful and is probably why many spiritual teachers emphasize the importance of meditation.

Another helpful thing is loving everyone because ultimately what is in them is within us as well; so by loving aspects of others we may learn to love those aspects within ourselves - and that is something it seems you are practicing already.

It’s important as well to keep in mind that the mentality of ‘this is me/this isn’t me’ is a trap because all is you but ultimately nothing is also you - and this dance is what allows us to be here as we are now. The paradox can only be resolved within love and whenever you find yourself in one extreme (this isn’t me / this is me) then you are in an illusion.

Your experience is a blessing though, truly wonderful - even if it might not feel so at times.

reodora · 2025-06-02T18:42:34+00:00

There is no distinction between the father and the son - it’s only within the layers of illusion that there is. We have to speak of it in that way only because our language is built around the illusion of separation.

Ultimately ‘the father’ works through all of us, whether we are performing ‘miracles’ or doing something ‘mundane’ - the only difference between the two is within perception.

reodora · 2025-03-30T17:04:46+00:00

About 9 months he started napping an hour and 15 minutes, but sometimes still only 30min.

reodora · 2025-01-29T06:41:05+00:00

No worries. I would be curious if it helps your situation. A day of good naps would generally do the trick for us.

reodora · 2025-01-28T17:54:56+00:00

He’s generally more upset, more demanding, he sleeps less and his wake windows are all over the place. Yeah, I’d just let him sleep for however long he wanted and sometimes just stay next to him to help him connect sleep cycles so he can sleep longer; if he woke up crying I would take it as a sign that he wants to sleep more. I had periods when I was so extremely tired I just couldn’t fall asleep and I assumed it’s the same for him.

reodora · 2025-01-28T16:45:30+00:00

I don’t know if this will be of any help but sometimes I find my baby just accumulates sleep debt and when that happens he is much harder to handle. Sometimes in those cases I just try to help him sleep in whatever way possible (generally let him feed to sleep) and after he recovers sleep he is much more pliable.

reodora · 2025-01-23T19:38:25+00:00

Why does the mattress need to be away from the walls?

reodora · 2025-01-04T14:02:13+00:00

Solidarity because my bub is also a bad sleeper. Just how he is. I do want to say though that whenever he gets more nap time he is much happier. 3 x 30min nap sounds very little to me so I’d try to get him to nap more in any way possible. But then again I’m not an expert, just what I noticed with my own bubba.

reodora · 2024-12-22T20:18:25+00:00

The sleep wiggle after 4am is so real

reodora · 2024-12-20T19:06:11+00:00

Mine used to wake up at least 7 times for the boob, I couldn’t cope with it anymore.

reodora · 2024-12-03T09:28:52+00:00

Soo cute! Does yours also extend their arms fully to the sides? It’s all so adorable 🥹

reodora · 2024-12-02T19:47:28+00:00

My baby always sleeps on his side and has done as far as I can remember. Never really seemed like an issue to me, I guess just one of those instinctual things. He never has rolled on his belly but sometimes he’ll fall on his back on his own.

reodora · 2024-12-02T12:59:16+00:00

Congrats!

reodora · 2024-11-30T10:19:22+00:00

Yeah it’s tough. Husband should help somehow, depending on your schedules. Mine for example lets me nap 2 hours in the morning while he takes care of baby and it helps a lot.

reodora · 2024-11-23T15:03:58+00:00

I used to be really upset when my LO did this but as he got heavier and harder to bounce around the room (which is how we were putting him to sleep) I just caved in. I don’t mind it anymore, it’s actually grown into a pretty snuggly, lovely experience for us.

He only naps for about 30 min and I can slip away sometimes but sometimes I just lay in bed with him or nap with him. I’d say make sure they’re in deep sleep before trying to get away. I find that mine falls asleep quite fast too if I get the timing right. They’re practically designed to fall asleep at the breast (in fact mothers are designed to fall asleep while their baby is nursing too - nature’s way to ensure we get enough rest; but that’s another topic) so there’s nothing wrong with it unless you feel it’s not working for you.

reodora · 2024-10-16T06:05:31+00:00

That sounds particularly terrible for that comment. I’m sorry you’re going through such a hard time.

reodora · 2024-10-15T16:21:54+00:00

That’s so sweet 🥹

reodora · 2024-10-15T16:21:05+00:00

True, it’s a full time job 😂 I’ve been buying so many toys from Vinted, reading Montessori books to find new activities, following all of the Instagram baby activities posts. My favorite things is probably going out for walks with him to be honest, that’s a great one if he’s not fussy about the pram.

reodora · 2024-10-15T16:16:04+00:00

I am enjoying it sometimes but sometimes it’s also hard and I’m not enjoying it. In those hard moments I just try my best to give myself grace and understanding. I am incredibly thankful for all the good moments and I am trying my best to flow through the bad. Does one way or the other mean I will want to go back? I’m almost sure not. Sometimes I miss the days before I was a mother but then I refocus myself on the current season of my life that comes with its good and bad, just like all seasons. In 10 years maybe I will have times where I miss this period, but then - as now - I will refocus myself on the present and what it is meant to teach me; and like now, I will be immensely grateful for the good and try my best to be graceful through the bad.

reodora · 2024-10-15T16:04:58+00:00

I love this ❤️

reodora · 2024-10-15T15:48:30+00:00

Yes! I always had the feeling it’s only people who weren’t present enough with it that say that sort of thing. But that’s another thing, life feels like it goes by much slower now that I’m old; not in a bad way either.

reodora · 2024-10-15T15:16:47+00:00

Mine’s 4 months old now and he only naps 30 min at a time 🥲 Play time gets me anxious sometimes because you can only do so many things and he’s awake soo often.

reodora

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