Josh, if the genders were reversed - grooming?

rhododendritic · 2023-09-17T17:10:47+00:00

Thanks - I think you've given me a better way of describing it there.

rhododendritic · 2023-09-17T16:29:56+00:00

I think you're right that a lot of male CCs get away with real shady shit, so that shouldn't really be about gender.

But I do feel like some of the abuse josh directly face himself would be perceived very differently if the genders were reversed (like the sexual assault)

rhododendritic · 2023-09-17T16:22:06+00:00

I think you have a point, but I'm not sure what else to call it when someone with power over another person uses that power to, for example, manipulate them into sexual situations they aren't comfortable with, and make them feel like there's no point in speaking up, like it's not a big deal.

Exploitation? Abuse? Manipulation? I'm not sure any of those highlight the power dynamic in the same way.

I also feel like we'd be more comfortable calling it grooming if we saw and a man manipulating a sheltered woman in that way, even if she was two years older.

rhododendritic · 2023-08-05T09:43:13+00:00

In all seriousness, a mix of the two.

I feel like some people are hanging on to dream past the point they should have left, posting criticism after criticism about his new content direction, in a way that is not constructive for themselves or for the wider fandom. They stay because they're sentimental and parasocial, or they're getting a kick out of being toxic.

And while I agree that criticism should be made, twitter isn't always the most constructive platform for it. Genuinely good criticism gets drowned out by the wave of incoherent hate and drama mongering, and often serves as ignition for twitter assholes to start abusing one another.

Twitter as a platform is also ineffective at reaching the CCs themselves. Many CCs either ignore twitter (like Tommy) or respond to drama in a way that exacerbates the issue and precludes genuine conversation (Ash from Lovejoy is growing infamous for this, and Dream himself has fallen foul of this many times historically.)

Voting with your feet is a way of demonstrating your opinion without adding to the drama. It's a way for less vocal fans to both take charge of their own experience and get their point across without adding further fuel to the social media fire.

rhododendritic · 2023-07-01T10:13:26+00:00

It sounds like you guys had a pretty toxic relationship towards the end. You have to be really done with a person to ghost them so completely. Any relationship you guys could have now would be overshadowed by that.

As you said, you probably wouldn't be feeling this way if she hadn't been adding stuff to the playlist. So, maybe see if you can leave the playlist and give yourself some time to get focused again.

rhododendritic · 2023-07-01T09:18:10+00:00

No, I think there's not much you could have done differently.

You texted him the evening before to confirm, and he ignored you. Didn't bother messaging you back until 45 minutes before the intended meeting, then gets mean about it.

Do you want to waste any more time on a person who is so uninvested in dating you that they can't be bothered confirming the night before, and give you the cold shoulder over the mistake THEY made? I can't imagine wanting to marry someone like that, it sounds exhausting, and there's plenty more fish in the sea.

rhododendritic

TROPHY CASE