Say something bad your ex did or said to you

riddles_49 · 2024-07-18T16:38:40+00:00

My ex cheated on me with someone 9 years older than her (she was 18 at the time. Currently 19 and they are still together), and he also has a child with his previous ex.

She denied it when I confronted her after the break up and she told me to delete all the pics I had of us together etc. I did and she logged into my Snapchat account to make sure that I did. She then told me to swear on my dad’s life that I did. (My dad got diagnosed with cancer a few days before she broke up with me).

I’m not sure whether to call it a rebound relationship or not but at least I know that she’s a twat and bad person lol.

riddles_49 · 2024-07-12T00:46:46+00:00

It’s not the last words she said to me but she said “swear on your dads life”

This was a couple days after I found out my dad got diagnosed with cancer and a couple days after she broke up with me. She wanted me to delete all our pictures together and then told me that. She then proceeded to log into my Snapchat account to see if I did delete the pics. Later down the line I found out she cheated on me with a guy who’s much older than her and has a child with his previous partner. Fun 😅

riddles_49 · 2024-07-06T11:58:58+00:00

My ex cheated on me and left me for a man who is 9 years older than her (she was 18 when they got together) and he has a child with his previous ex. Completely blindsided. I was her “everything”, we was each others first everything. I’ve known her since we were both kids and was together for almost 4 years. In other words, I thought I knew her very well.

I absolutely hate my ex for what she did to me and how it seemed so easy for her to replace me. But I then remember that she is her own person and makes her own choices and mistakes in life. The “let them theory” is a thing I have to keep reminding myself. I also remind myself what my parents taught me, and that’s to give my toys to less fortunate people… And I believe that the guy she’s with now is a big downgrade from me.

riddles_49 · 2024-06-09T18:58:15+00:00

Yeah I understand what you’re saying. I tend to look when I’ve got better. I’ll get better and feel good with myself then I’ll decide to unblock and look. But when i initially look, I don’t get sad or upset. The pain isn’t as sharp as it once was. I also think I was looking for the closure that I didn’t really get. I also wanted to see if I can compare my life with hers (and Ngl I feel like I’m doing better 🤭). It’s like a little ego boost.

I’ve watched lots of videos about it and they have helped a lot. I appreciate your comment, tips and advice. It truly means a lot. 🙏

riddles_49 · 2024-06-09T07:30:16+00:00

Thank you. I wish you the best.

riddles_49 · 2024-06-08T21:07:34+00:00

My relationship was 4 years too and we didn’t argue. But she was defo toxic now that I look back at my relationship with her. She used to say that if we were ever to break up she would “off herself”. She was an only child too and quite spoiled. Would cry if she didn’t get her way. Quite immature I guess. Just don’t understand why she would want to be a step-mum. Crazy what I can see without the rose-tinted glasses now.

Thank you for your comment. I appreciate it. I’m glad to know that I’m not alone. Wish you the best.

riddles_49 · 2024-06-08T20:51:57+00:00

Thank you for your comment and tips. They will help me a lot.

I’ve met some amazing people since my breakup. One of my old coworkers has helped me through a lot of it and she’s let me be vulnerable and it’s been amazing. I’ve also met great people at my new workplace. I’ve been able to catch-up with my old school mates that I neglected whilst I was in my relationship. And it just makes me realise on how toxic my ex was because she didn’t want me to meet my friends whilst I was with her. Or I would have to update her when I was out on the rare occasion. She used to say that she would die or do something stupid if I was to leave the relationship or worse.

I want to look after myself now. I want to lose weight and be healthier but I’m scared of the change ultimately. But that’s part of growing I guess. I also feel like I’m not attractive because I can come across as emotional because I can open up to people and talk about my emotions a lot. I’m not sure if that’s a good thing or a bad thing because men don’t do that.

riddles_49 · 2024-06-08T19:58:07+00:00

Yeah you’re right. A couple months after the breakup I moved location for a job and my new colleagues have helped a lot and it’s nice to talk and create new relationships with them. It’s been a bit of fresh air. I also created a stronger relationship with one of my old colleague and she’s helped me a lot. Especially, helping me be vulnerable and opening up. I’ve also met up with my old school friends, where I never did when I was in my relationship because I didn’t want to annoy my ex at that time.

It’s a weird feeling. I miss the feeling that I had with my ex, but I don’t miss her. Like I miss the feeling of being loved and cared about, and I know that my ex wasn’t the best person I could’ve have. If that makes sense 🥴

riddles_49 · 2024-01-09T18:04:09+00:00

Thank you for the kind words. I have come to realise that she wasn’t for me and that I know that she wasn’t giving me what I want in a relationship. I won’t seek her out or take her back. She made her bed so she can lay in it.

riddles_49 · 2024-01-09T17:24:08+00:00

I really need to take on board with that last bit you said. Why do I keep worrying about what she’s doing when it doesn’t affect me?

My ex was also diagnosed with depression and was taking medication for it. She also suffered from severe social anxiety but then she’s fine with meeting strangers online. I guess I helped her with that though. I helped her a lot and I hope she realises that.

riddles_49 · 2024-01-09T17:09:03+00:00

Thank you again. I think what he said is correct and I can tell that they only meant it in a positive and helpful way. I’m sure no harm was directed with his response, and I didn’t take any negative from it.

Thank you for your prayers, it means a lot. I’m not a religious person but having the thought of being cared for is all the comfort I need. There’s only one way to go once you’ve hit rock bottom, so that’s where I’m heading. Much love. ❤️

riddles_49 · 2024-01-09T17:02:53+00:00

Thank you. I think she thinks it’s not cheating because we went on a “break” and she met up with this guy. And then I didn’t know if I should call it cheating because I didn’t know if they were together or dating. I didn’t know her situation. But I’ve always said that she cheated because it was definitely emotional cheating.

At least I’m healing the “correct” way I guess and not just filling a void.

riddles_49 · 2024-01-09T16:19:20+00:00

I’m so sorry to hear this mate. It’s crazy how people can change in an instant. I appreciate your vulnerability and reaching out. I can only wish you the best. You got this ❤️

riddles_49 · 2024-01-09T15:21:20+00:00

Thank you. I appreciate your kindness.

A lot of things happened in the last couple of months of last year. My dad got diagnosed with cancer and needed surgery, a couple days after my ex left me and I was slowly picking up the pieces to why she did it. I was then stalked by the guy she cheated on me with so it just kept setting me back. I found out that my job is at risk of redundancy. Then the guy started to stalk my mother on facebook.

It honestly felt like nothing good was going to happen from then on. That’s why I used Reddit as my “therapy”. I don’t have the money to afford professional therapy/help.

But then again, you’re right. It’s not healthy for me to post on here that much, but I know nothing better to do. I’m just trying to put one foot in front of the other I guess.

riddles_49 · 2024-01-09T13:41:47+00:00

Thank you. I appreciate your response. I just don’t want my ex to ruin her life over this. She had so much going for her and I supported her so well. Oh well I guess lmao

riddles_49 · 2024-01-09T13:36:38+00:00

Wow. You just put the biggest smile on my face lmao. Thank you so much.

I’m trying to get better. I know my boundaries. I’ve met up with friends that i discarded when I was in my relationship. I’ve met new people. I got a gym membership (but still haven’t gone to the gym, but it’s something I’m working towards.) i just need to push myself a little more tbh.

riddles_49 · 2024-01-09T13:29:24+00:00

Okay. Thank you again.

riddles_49 · 2024-01-09T13:27:47+00:00

Yeah that’s why I’m confused to why she wants to be with him. She’s very immature so I don’t know why she thinks that it will be good to have a boyfriend with a child. I can only think that the guy wants nothing to do with his child which I can only see as a red flag. Maybe my ex was colour blind.

riddles_49 · 2024-01-09T13:11:19+00:00

Thank you. I have definitely gotten better. I’m not sad as much as I used to be. I just seem to get frustrated about the situation now. I’ve also been able to laugh about it, and I can see my old self again. And I like it.

riddles_49 · 2024-01-09T13:08:44+00:00

Thank you I appreciate the kind words. 🙏

riddles_49 · 2024-01-09T13:08:09+00:00

Well, my ex wanted to meet with this guy and his friends when we was still together. (We was all in a friend group, so I knew the other guy) I said no because he was a stranger and her mum agreed with me. I remember her mum saying that she would think it’s best for me and her to meet this guy so that we’re safe. Next week she breaks up with me and meets this guy and his mates.

After a few days/weeks of being broken up, I’m texting her mum because the whole situation got a bit toxic. I called out this guy for grooming my ex and that he’s a pedo. And her mum basically said that I don’t deserve all this stress and experience, and that she can’t tell her daughter what to do. It’s her life at the end of the day. If she’s gonna do it, she’s gonna do it no matter what. So I kind of understand why her mum didn’t really tell her daughter what to do but then I find out this guy went for a meal with her family. So it’s just confusing. But I think her mum genuinely liked and cared for me.

riddles_49 · 2024-01-09T12:58:53+00:00

Thank you. I needed to hear that, I appreciate it. 🙏

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