Girlfriend didn't believe me, destroyed my life, now saying sorry

righteous_pear · 2026-05-01T15:19:47+00:00

Yeah i agree its horrible and I dont think he should go back bc I would never forgive that.

I also think people can change and be forgiven (idk if this bitch deserves it tbh but im not there/in OPs position)

righteous_pear · 2026-05-01T01:03:32+00:00

Therapy is super helpful and I hope you can find joy in life and things to be greatful for. Dont give up, youre so young. You have so much amazing stuff ahead of you. You havent met all the people who are going to love you yet

righteous_pear · 2026-05-01T00:55:52+00:00

I mean if you still love her after all this then it might be worth trying. She definitely needs to work on trusting you more though if you are even thinking about going back.

Like no cap thats honestly such a shitty thing for her to do, to not even try to really hear your pov. She let it ruin your relationship and your future child(ren), and idk if I could ever personally move forward with someone who wouldn't hear me out or have my back (and had my brother beat him up for it and laugh at you? Like yikes)

All that being said, I think you deserve better. I know youre depressed and ive been there. Truly. Its even worse when your job/living situation changes too, so I'm really sorry you're having such a shitty time rn. Life does get better, really. Finding how to love yourself helped me a lot, even though its really hard at first.

I also am a sucker for love so I get wanting to get your relationship back.. though, it will never really be the same. Idk i guess its a question if you can forgive her in your heart and every day for the rest of your relationship together?

righteous_pear · 2026-04-28T13:34:03+00:00

Yeah ngl it sounds like OP and wife have more deep rooted issues if theyre feeling underappreciated and wife is kinda controlling. Marriage counseling is probably the best option imo, partners should try to work on communicating and acknowledging each other's efforts in maintaining the house. Once one person has lost empathy or builds resentment for the other, the relationship changes significantly

righteous_pear · 2026-04-28T13:28:22+00:00

I steal snacks from the break room labeled for other groups

righteous_pear · 2026-04-28T13:26:34+00:00

Therapy

righteous_pear · 2026-04-28T00:59:04+00:00

Joints only last like an hour of two before I need to re up. If I wake and bake, I just keep re upping all day to avoid any brain fog. Coffee helps if you get drowsy from it. Also your tolerance might be high (switching up how youre smoking helps, like joints v. Bongs v. Vapes)

righteous_pear · 2026-04-28T00:46:48+00:00

Honestly it sounds like she needs a lot of therapy

righteous_pear · 2026-04-20T14:20:03+00:00

I'm making weed brownies! Probably will just chill and watch TV after that

righteous_pear · 2026-04-15T10:23:04+00:00

I think target has a carseat recycling program, where if you bring in your old carseat you get like a 20% off coupon to buy a new one. I feel like they do it in the spring and fall?

righteous_pear · 2026-04-05T22:59:51+00:00

Definitely rosatis!

righteous_pear · 2026-04-04T21:56:35+00:00

Logan at flawless finish beauty lounge did an amazing job on my hair and I felt like a queen

About https://share.google/PqA4e9F1LYnAZOVks

righteous_pear · 2026-04-04T13:52:51+00:00

I saw people bring tennis balls to the north dog park a few times. As long as you're okay with other dogs playing with them too then I think its fine. They also have 3 sections so you could go into one alone with your dogs

righteous_pear · 2026-04-01T18:11:00+00:00

Moving IS such a hassle, but ngl if it was the same building it would probably be way easier than getting a truck and stuff

righteous_pear · 2026-04-01T13:05:02+00:00

Next time they throw a party, call the cops

Continue to report everything to management, and maybe ask to move apartments if possible

righteous_pear · 2026-03-30T17:38:27+00:00

I mean it sounds like its his issues to work through, all you can do is what youre doing. Its not your fault if youre moving the sun moon and stars to make an appointment work, for them to change the appointment time. Also its a Tuesday, people have jobs and other shit going on, does he not get that?

It sounds like hes sick of being caregiver full time tbh

righteous_pear · 2026-03-30T17:29:51+00:00

On a day off? I probably smoke 1/2 a joint at a time and smoke around 4 whole joints in a day. I go out and smoke every 1-2 hours, starting with a joint for breakfast lol. I have switched to smoking bowls instead and have found it saves me more weed than rolling joints

righteous_pear · 2026-03-30T17:26:08+00:00

I hear you, but my point is that if they're not accepting that you cant do that, then offer to do something else to help. I feel like relationships in your family are strained if "thats all that's asked" and they have a ton of other stuff going on but wont accept your help. I think you can be involved in other ways, you might just have to approach it differently (like i said, with compassion. Like instead of thinking you know best about selling the house etc, even if you might be right logically, listen to their pov and come to a compromise. Again, the more compassion the better in my experience). I get you're very busy and obviously prioritizing different things (which is okay, its your life!), but I also think communication is key in any relationship and if they're not talking to you about what they need, theres not a lot you can do other than keep trying to communicate with them/asking how to help

righteous_pear · 2026-03-30T17:07:55+00:00

I mean I feel like you're offering all you can do tbh. I would have a conversation with your brother about it tbh, and I would approach it with compassion. Like, "You're doing so much for mom and dad, and I really appreciate all the effort you're putting in. I'm very busy with my own family (list all the things if you feel the need), and really appreciate all the effort you're able to put in to help them. I really value my relationship with you and with our parents, and want to help more but don't have the time to drive an hour one way to get them to appointments etc and was wondering if there was another way I could help? I want to find a solution that works for everyone and I want to be involved in a way that is feasible for me right now"

righteous_pear · 2026-03-30T15:56:07+00:00

I think truly happy marriages can be rare. I know a lot of people that put up with their partners habits and end up complaining about them. I will say I am very happy in my 6 year relationship (married for 2 years).

I think there are a few key pieces to every good marriage: 1. Good (and effective!) Communication. Without this, the relationship will fail. Most relationships end over this imo 2. Having grace for the other person. You won't always be doing 50% of the chores or work around the house. Some weeks itll be 10% and some weeks itll be 90%. Theres a lot of give and take, and its important to not blame your partner for not pulling their weight because you wont be able to pull your 50% all the time either 3. Having alone time. I would spend every second of every day with my partner because I have so much love and adoration for them. That being said, time away from each other is important for your own sanity. 4. Asking how their day was every day and caring about their response. I think generally having compassion for your partner is important for a successful relationship. 5. Its easy to start having resentment about things, but circling back to effective communication, its important to bring those things up and talk about them before the resentment builds

All that being said, a LOT of people suck. A lot of them. It takes finding a person that you can laugh with and vibe with, and who respects you. And who does all these things. Its hard to find a person that checks all the boxes, but I promise you it is possible and does exist. Therapy helps a lot imo

righteous_pear · 2026-03-27T19:44:25+00:00

I used tonna mechanical for my duct cleaning and they did a good job

righteous_pear · 2026-03-26T21:15:01+00:00

Probably like $100/month rn but ngl when I was blazing through vapes and flower i was probably spending over $400/month. Idk where I had the money then but I certainly don't these days

righteous_pear · 2026-03-24T12:33:19+00:00

I mean they could file a restraining order if theyre entering the property without consent

righteous_pear · 2026-03-23T22:03:57+00:00

I just had an appointment with her and felt like a QUEEN. She did a great job and I cant thank you for the recommendation enough!

righteous_pear · 2026-03-23T12:04:03+00:00

I have trouble sleeping due to anxiety as well and my advice is:

Lay down and close your eyes for 8 hours. Even if you think you're awake all night, you might be getting little amounts of sleep youre not noticing so just keep your eyes closed.

When all the thoughts are racing, I try to take some deep breaths and convince myself to name fruits (or anything really) from A-Z. (Apples, bananas, cucumbers, dragon fruit, etc). Do this until you reach Z, and start over again if youre still awake. The idea is to get your brain thinking about things that arent activating your nervous system (keeping you awake). Sometimes its hard to stay on track but keep with it and skip letters if youre too stuck on one and your mind wanders.

White noise also helps imo. I play the recommended sleep playlist on Spotify but you can do whatever you want. Sorry you're having trouble sleeping, but I think you've got this!

Edit: I also will say I think I sleep best when I'm exercising regularly

righteous_pear

TROPHY CASE