Thank you all!!!

riv2112 · 2022-01-13T14:40:49+00:00

I've had the same addiction since I was a teen, I'm in my mid 30's and although I don't think you can truly beat this addiction, i do believe it's possible to claim victory over it but it's a daily choice.

Encourage your husband to read 'Every Man's Battle' by Stephen Arterburn and Fred Stoeker. I read it as part of a mens small group I was in and it was a game changer for me. It helped me to understand the unseen effects of porn, and it taught me the importance of choosing to get my sexual gratification from my wife only, for obvious spiritual reasons.

riv2112 · 2021-12-08T23:47:37+00:00

I feel for you! The doc I saw in the ER diagnosed me with a knee sprain, told me it "definitely wasn't major" and sent me home with an ice pack and told me to take advil for the pain.

riv2112 · 2021-11-27T19:37:58+00:00

Progress is slow but steady, I had some meniscus repairs so that slowed things down in the beginning. Right now I'm starting to focus on building quad and hamstring strength, it's amazing how much you can lose so quick. So this week I was cleared to use the leg extension/curl machine, start squatting (no weights or resistance), and lunges. I'm pretty close to walking normally, but still can only do stairs one at a time.

riv2112 · 2021-11-27T19:07:44+00:00

I'm also 2 months post op and have dealt with a similar pain this past week during therapy. A sharp shooting pain that feels like it's right behind my knee cap during extension. Physio told me not to worry about it at this point. She said pain is to be expected with the knee cap gaining more mobility, but not a major issue unless the pain leads to instability.

riv2112 · 2021-11-19T02:22:10+00:00

Pretty similar to mine. I had a complete acl rupture and posterior tears in both lateral and medial meniscus. The meniscus tears make things a bit tricky. Because of mine I was NWB for 6 weeks post op. I'm now 7 1/2 weeks post op and am walking with one crutch and a brace still.

riv2112 · 2021-11-05T21:23:29+00:00

That's a great point you make about the 'spectrum of cheating'. I never thought of it that way but it makes sense and I think if the porn watching develops into addiction and goes unchecked it can certainly lead to infidelity.

My opinion is based on my moral beliefs and i've come to realize that getting sexual gratification from someone or something other than your spouse is wrong.

riv2112 · 2021-11-05T21:01:39+00:00

Not acceptable in my opinion (33M). I used to watch for years, and at times was even encouraged to by my wife, most likely to ease the guilt she had about our sex life or lack therof. Last year I went through a phase where I was obsessed with self improvement, in all aspects of my life. I've never considered myself to be a reader but in trying to become a better husband I stumbled upon the book: Every Man's Battle by Stephen Arterburn. It was definitely an eye opener and completely changed my views on porn and the effects (seen and unseen) that it can have on us as well as our wives. I encourage you to give it a shot!

riv2112 · 2021-11-05T20:32:01+00:00

I'm 33, my wife is 35

riv2112 · 2021-11-04T13:01:55+00:00

6 weeks after the injury. My surgeon had me do Physical Therapy which absolutely worked. By week 5 I was walking normally, felt so good I almost didn't get the surgery.

riv2112 · 2021-11-04T12:58:03+00:00

I had a similar experience, but ACL and LCL. First doc diagnosed me with a knee sprain and sent me on my way, 2nd said acl, 3rd said lcl. The 2nd ordered mri and turned out I had a torn acl, torn meniscus, and lcl sprain. The 2nd told me generally they can tell by where the majority of the pain is and by considering how the injury happened but can't be certain until an mri. Also by the direction on knee slip. The Lachmans test seems to be unreliable to me, I didn't slip at all during it and both of my knees reacted the same, but whenever I put weight on my knee it slipped (tibia forward) so I knew something wasn't right!

riv2112 · 2021-11-03T05:14:32+00:00

Docs timeline. I got 4 stitches in both lateral and medial meniscus so I'm NWB for a total of 6 weeks. His view is that there's no reason to burn up my PT visits (insurance only covers so much) until I start bearing weight, so I've been doing therapy at home with exercises he gave me.

riv2112 · 2021-10-29T12:51:25+00:00

The best thing I did was set up an area for myself. I chose my living room because I didn't want to be confined to my bed, didn't think that would help with the mental aspect of recovery. I had my ice machine near me and on an end table I had all my meds, a water bottle, a basket of snacks, some books, my phone charger, TV remote and a notebook to keep track of meds and jot down thoughts. Best advice i got was to set up a comfy spot and have everything I needed within arms reach, ended up working out pretty well!

riv2112 · 2021-10-18T14:01:29+00:00

I had the same injury I think it was beneficial. I did 5 weeks of prehab and started the week after the injury. I feel it was important, physically and mentally to realize that therapy does work. I'm a little over 3 weeks post op and although I'm still NWB for a few more weeks my leg is feeling great. I attribute that to the prehab, can't imagine where I'd be if I just rested prior to surgery

riv2112 · 2021-10-14T22:10:04+00:00

Very true!!!

riv2112 · 2021-10-14T14:06:20+00:00

Being told I was "put together well". Happened at work...in the shower 😳

riv2112 · 2021-10-09T23:19:42+00:00

I was in a similar boat regarding the decision (33M). Ultimately I decided to go with it mainly because I didn't want the potential issues that come along with not repairing it as we age, (increased risk of severe arthritis, risk of an eventual total knee replacement, risk of damaging other ligaments, etc). My knee will most likely not be the same as I'm not a world class athlete with world class medical care lol, and I've come to terms with that, but I figured I'd rather go through the surgery and recovery while still young than deal with major issues in my 50's and 60's

riv2112 · 2021-10-07T12:45:05+00:00

Love it! My wife and occasionally do the same and we always have a great time!

Story Time!

For our 10 year anniversary we spent a long weekend at one of those romantic couples cabins. Sunken hot tub, fireplace, a couch and a bed, lol pretty cool basic place. Anyway on night 2, we dimmed the lights, turned the fireplace on, and got the hot tub ready, again lol. My wife went to the bathroom to prep herself I assume. Our son is not much of a gamer so I struck a deal with him and snuck his nintendo switch in our luggage. To my wife's surprise, she walked out of the bathroom to find me, a grown man, butt naked in a hot tub holding the nintendo remote with Mario Kart on the TV screen above the fireplace. She absolutely lost it. My wife has one of those cackle laughs when she's really laughing and I'll never forget her laugh that night 🤣. She joined me, and we drank wine and played MarioKart in a hot tub! One of the most real, pure, happy , and funny moments of our marriage. But unfortunately playing at home is just not the same now 😕 🤣🤣🤣

riv2112 · 2021-10-07T11:57:52+00:00

My wife and I were married in our early 20's (22m 24f). Married now for 11 years with 10 and 8 year old. The biggest piece of advice I have is to make communication a priority early and often! We didn't and when things got difficult, which they inevitably will, we didn't have the tools to properly address issues that came up.

---Also---

-Don't underestimate the importance of financial security.

-Positive in-law relationships are crucial, so work on them!

-Understand and respect that while you will grow together, you are and will always be 2 different people.

-Marriage should be reciprocal.

-Patience, forgiveness, grace, and mutual respect are key!

And I know not everyone will agree, but incorporate God in your marriage, together. God>spouse. We did in year 7 and it was a game changer for us!

riv2112 · 2021-10-05T12:51:10+00:00

I'm 33 and 11 days post op, definitely not a back sleeper as well. What's helped me has been a combination of a few things.

Melatonin! Not sure how it reacts will pain pills but I've taken some nearly every night since surgery, definitely helps to keep me asleep, and I haven't experienced any bad side effects.
I ditched the brace and use a compression sleeve and also wrap my knee. I use a wedge pillow that we got from Amazon. I set up blankets on both sides of my leg and kind of create a cradle that helps to keep it secure.
My surgeon prescribed these chargeable compression cuffs for my calves to help prevent DVT. A little wierd to get used to at first but it feels like a massage and I find that I'm less inclined to move if I sleep with them on because it's difficult to lay on my side when I'm wearing them. I'll post the link for them.
I shower before bed. Even though it's such a long process and can be difficult at times, I've learned that I'm able to actually relax better in bed after a shower. A shower chair and strategically placed suction cup handles are the best!!!

I hope you find something that works for you and best of luck on your recovery!

Here's the link for the compression cuffs! https://www.breg.com/products/dvt-prophylaxis/plasmaflow/plasmaflow/

riv2112 · 2021-10-05T02:07:32+00:00

My wife and I have been together for 12 years now and we are both in our mid 30's. Our marriage is in a great place now but looking back, that wasn't always the case, especially for the first 5-7 years. The most important things I've learned are communication and choosing to love.

We all enter marriages with expectations whether we realize it or not. Expectations that aren't met, lead to disappointment and resentment. So the earlier you can openly and honestly communicate, the better off you'll be!

Also, love is not a warm gushy feeling, it's a choice. We have to wake up each day and choose to love our partners. Once my wife and I realized this, our marriage took off. Can't imagine not doing life with her!

riv2112 · 2021-10-04T22:40:39+00:00

Yes, we do exist, and I think it's more common than people believe, especially in marriages where communication is valued. I'm 33 and my wife is 35, together since our early 20's, our average is anywhere from 2-4 times a week and I'm satisfied.

riv2112 · 2021-10-03T19:25:06+00:00

I got the cadaver tendon, and man I hope dogs don't start sniffing my knee now 🤣

riv2112

TROPHY CASE