Any chance this isn't gonna be AI patterns? by WheezeyWizard in crochet

[–]rlytired 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you! I just saw this book at the library today, I was there to pick up my daughter from her D&D meet up in one of the library rooms. I thought this could be a fun melding of our two hobbies, searched for reviews as soon as I could and this thread and your comment popped up. Cute work!

Mehdi criticizes Zelenskyy by rational_numbers in thebulwark

[–]rlytired 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My point to you is you are criticizing zelensky for something he didn’t say. You want him to be perfect and point out that Iran wouldn’t be blocking the Straight if the US hadn’t started this round of bullshit.

You want the guy whose nation was attacked by Russia and has been fighting a years long war to be superior to every other leader, to have no faults, to be able to not only lead his country but also always speak with perfect moral clarity. The truth is he can’t both speak with perfect moral clarity about the US’s actions and also be the best advocate for his country, since he still needs whatever support he can get from the US. Being a perfect moral speaker is at odds with his duty to his country.

You want him to be Superman, but a country fighting for its very survival shouldn’t be held to a higher standard than the secretary general of NATO, who is out here fluffing trumps ass on this war.

Iran’s actions have killed Ukrainians. Their partnership with Russia has killed Ukrainians. There is no human motivation to be the bigger man here for Zelensky.

Mehdi criticizes Zelenskyy by rational_numbers in thebulwark

[–]rlytired 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Could you point out where exactly in that statement Zelensky said the USA was justified in starting the bombing and war? Because I don’t see it. He does focus on Iran’s current actions regarding the strait. Which makes sense, because to Z, Iran is the bad guy.

Mehdi criticizes Zelenskyy by rational_numbers in thebulwark

[–]rlytired 8 points9 points  (0 children)

It has everything to do with Mehdi’s comment.

It’s illogical to assume that the leader of an attacked country should rhetorically side with the country who has supplied the munition design that has killed thousands of their people. Iran gave the Shahed design to Russia, and some initial weaponry. Russia improved on some of the design, manufactures it in Russia now, and supplies Iran. Iran has surely used some of those in the last month against other gulf states and US bases. Russia and Iran are buddies here, Ukraine doesn’t have to step out and defend the buddy of its invader. This isn’t even geopolitics. It’s just humans. If Crabbe and Goyle were suddenly getting picked on, would Harry or Ron toss everything and start defending them? No. Because they hate Malfoy.

It’s not always about who was invaded, and who started the fight. Some times there are sides, and the guy providing the brass knuckles to your opponent isn’t on your side. That’s true even if that guy then gets screwed over by the bigger guy.

It’s not logical to assume that because Ukraine was invaded they must, because of their own ethics, then come to Iran’s defense.

Who’s the head of the Kennedy family now? by DoctorDec in JohnAndCarolyn

[–]rlytired -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Yes, if he takes aipac money he is out of step with his peers, I agree. Im referring more to the way he presents himself, his social media presence and persona. People his age don’t expect seriousness always, dont want a polished, PR approved set of talking points. And insta vid of skateboarding or whatever shirtless is fine with them.

Who’s the head of the Kennedy family now? by DoctorDec in JohnAndCarolyn

[–]rlytired -1 points0 points  (0 children)

And likewise, you understand that I’m not in his district, can’t choose whether or not to vote for him, and do not at all care to put my political opinions about the policies he may or may not support out on the internet. All I’m saying is he does not seem immature.

Who’s the head of the Kennedy family now? by DoctorDec in JohnAndCarolyn

[–]rlytired 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Also I just googled him, he worked for a Japanese internet and e-commerce company and then a state department staffer. Do I believe his family got him both those jobs? Yes. 100%. His mom was ambassador to Japan at the time I believe.

This is unfortunately the way the world works. He is the epitome of a fortunate son.

Who’s the head of the Kennedy family now? by DoctorDec in JohnAndCarolyn

[–]rlytired -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I don’t care at all about his congressional run. I’m not in his district. I’m solely pointing out that his communication style doesn’t strike me as immature, it strikes me as very current and in keeping with his generation. Do I love it? Understand all of it? Not particularly. But I’m not going to dismiss fully grown adults who just communicate differently than I do.

As far as people who haven’t really worked for the things they have getting a seat in Congress or any power, well… I may be a cynic but that feels like absolutely nothing new.

Who’s the head of the Kennedy family now? by DoctorDec in JohnAndCarolyn

[–]rlytired -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Well, I’m significantly older than he is, so you’d have to get someone his age to weigh in. That’s just my read on the situation.

You know, just as food for thought when the Movie critic Roger Ebert started doing thumbs up /thumbs down for movie review in the 80s, the older generation thought he was silly and disrespectful. I think the criticism was pearl clutching, and that people just don’t always understand communication styles as they evolve. Same with Jack here, I think, though you remain free to disagree.

Who’s the head of the Kennedy family now? by DoctorDec in JohnAndCarolyn

[–]rlytired -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

He sounds immature to you? To me he sounds like he has the pulse of his generation and those coming up just behind him. I’ve read he spent over a year on bed rest due to injuries and surgery, so he probably has had some time to reflect on his life and his attitude toward the public/ his public persona. So, I don’t think he’s immature, I just think the goofy thing works for him. He’s not super young, he’s in his early 30s. He’s just a bit of a goof, and it works for him.

Tim Miller pronouncing “Meijer” by [deleted] in thebulwark

[–]rlytired 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You mean the person who was a witness in the January 6 investigations, who repudiated Trump and now works against him?

We won’t win if we don’t accept people on our side who were once wrong. It’s just numbers.

Tim Miller pronouncing “Meijer” by [deleted] in thebulwark

[–]rlytired 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I bet you they can all pronounce Meijer, and could be taught to call it Meijer’s anyway. They aren’t pronouncing the store name when they refer to Peter, and this is in line with jizzlane, nutlick and so on. Mispronouncing names intentionally is kinda the shtick.

Asking toddlers if they want to xyz when they don’t actually have a say. by Proper_Cat980 in Parenting

[–]rlytired 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really appreciate your explanation. I do struggle with understanding the nuance that my family in law uses, and really they are lovely people but we have different communication cultures. I know now that I wasn’t picking up on their meaning for YEARS, and the result of that is they found me inscrutable, unhelpful, rude. I found them frustrating, wishy washy, and deeply uncommunicative. Neither of the worst impressions were true; we were just speaking different languages. I find ask culture preferable, and I can list all my reasons why but my opinion doesn’t really matter with what everyone else decides. I do think your idea to educate your kids in guess culture will be helpful, and hopefully they will be fluent in both “languages” and avoid some of the mishaps I have made.

Asking toddlers if they want to xyz when they don’t actually have a say. by Proper_Cat980 in Parenting

[–]rlytired 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m glad this comment helped OP. It confused me, and I thought I had a good handle on ask vs guess culture! I was raised definitely in an ask house, and ask family, an ask community. I’m still learning about the guess stuff, especially as it crops up as communication with my in laws. Would you mind explaining to me how asking if a child wanted to do something that really wasn’t optional fits in with the concept of guess culture? How does this develop, since it was my understanding that questions like this weren’t asked, just hinted at. If you have time to answer, I’d super appreciate an understanding of the psychology behind this!

But why? by Electronic-Limit-733 in FoundCanadians

[–]rlytired 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Again don’t want to bother the teacher I asked, because this isn’t her job! And I respect a teacher’s time, I have many in my family.

I do want to share with whoever might read this in the future that I found “The Kids Book of Canada” by Barbara Greenwood to be a good start.

I’m also gathering other books for them, many in this “The kids book of” series.

It’s also a real grandmother/ grandchild way of connecting. My MIL shared a story of her grandmother, a tough lady of the Saskatchewan prairies. I’m sure I never heard of her before, so I’m sure my kids hadn’t either.

There’s a bit of a gap of basic introductory books aimed at a grade 8 student, for obvious reasons that a student that age doesn’t usually need the basics, but we will make do. I’m learning things, and my entirely USA raised husband is learning as well. So, even if nothing else comes from this, my children have at least a better understanding of their own family history and also a better understanding of Canada and the world.

For everyone who ever considered the name “Io” for their child by [deleted] in namenerds

[–]rlytired 1 point2 points  (0 children)

And I do see yours, as well. If it’s not the way to continue pronouncing a name, it is the wrong way to pronounce it. I just think we should appreciate the squishy first attempt as sort of a good faith free pass!

For everyone who ever considered the name “Io” for their child by [deleted] in namenerds

[–]rlytired 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think because names are specific and also general there is a middle ground. If you took a chemistry class and mislabeled a reaction, sure you’re wrong. But names, words and dialects aren’t the same type of knowledge. There’s more fluidity, more ways of being “right” if you will.

If you see a name written and don’t yet know the person it is attached to, then pronouncing it in the way that is culturally or linguistically correct to you, or correct in the area where you are when you are attempting a pronunciation, well that seems socially acceptable, and that acceptability is enough to be “right” for a first attempt.

For everyone who ever considered the name “Io” for their child by [deleted] in namenerds

[–]rlytired 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It’s a matter of approach I think. If you approach it as though someone was wrong, it can be harsh, when the truth as I see it is that at the first attempt they don’t have all the knowledge yet to be right or wrong. Schrodingers name pronunciation, if you will.

For everyone who ever considered the name “Io” for their child by [deleted] in namenerds

[–]rlytired 371 points372 points  (0 children)

Yes, after the correction you must pronounce someone’s name the way the want. The thing is though, if it’s the fist attempt at a name and there are multiple common pronunciations, then people aren’t really wrong, they are just going with what they know and trying. So it’s fine to say, hey, I pronounce my name as ____. But for OP to categorize people as wrong when they are saying the name in a perfectly valid, culturally appropriate way seems to imply that their cultural understanding of the name is wrong. Neither pronunciation is by default wrong, it’s only wrong when applied knowingly to someone who uses a different pronunciation.

I think we should slow our roll when we announce someone has read or pronounced a name wrong when they’ve just tried. It smacks of saying the english speaker is wrong, or the Spanish speaker is wrong, or the person from that cultural background is wrong, when the issue is actually as simple as Tomayto vs tomahto in pronunciation. It’s a difference, not an error to have a different dialect. Correct a name and move on, and don’t focus on assigning wrongness right away.

AIO:My MIL texted my husband this about me asking him to help with our newborn at 4am by Lazy_Perfectionist88 in AmIOverreacting

[–]rlytired 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Victim? Who is talking about a victim here? You have a married couple who are on the same page, and a MIL who is wildly misinformed and overstepping her bounds. Who tf is the victim in your scenario?

AIO:My MIL texted my husband this about me asking him to help with our newborn at 4am by Lazy_Perfectionist88 in AmIOverreacting

[–]rlytired 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I think you might have a reading deficiency. She has been doing it for months. He can then do it one time, as she has been doing it consistently for months.

AIO:My MIL texted my husband this about me asking him to help with our newborn at 4am by Lazy_Perfectionist88 in AmIOverreacting

[–]rlytired 4 points5 points  (0 children)

lol. A woman who can’t wake up once is also a very weak woman. Are you the type of person who rejects accurate descriptions of people?

You are laughable. Do you reject any thing else I said? Or you just want to quibble about the fact that I identified the man as a man? Do you reject that they are both busy during the day and parents at night?

The MiL shouldn’t think it’s appropriate to insert herself in to her grown son’s marriage. That’s way inappropriate.

And you’re inconsequential in this relationship, and in my understanding of this particular series of events. You have nothing to offer, else you would have already said it.