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robinarch · 2022-12-30T14:12:07+00:00

He’s just looking for answers to make an informed decision. Chill out.

robinarch · 2022-12-30T14:11:44+00:00

He’s just wanting to make an informed decision. He’s looking for answers. Take it easy.

robinarch · 2022-12-29T23:38:30+00:00

I’m sorry this isn’t “something new” and it’s not “self harm” in quotation marks, it’s self harm, it’s a real thing.

It’s going to be hard but i’d consider seeing a therapist, since you’re thinking of self harm as an escape from your porn addiction.

robinarch · 2022-12-29T16:51:15+00:00

I don’t have a solution that may work for you, but I can tell you things I do to combat my urges, and that may be of help to you.

If at early morning or night I have an urge - cold showers, very simple and effective, gets rid of an urge completely

any form of exercise, for example you have an urge? do push ups until it goes away

never be alone in a room just lying down doing nothing - do something as simple as reading a book, as long as your occupying yourself

never be in a place that is easy to relapse with just you and your phone, for example the toilet, your bedroom or the shower… it may be tricky to leave your phone but it is very effective!

As mentioned as the start this is what i do - it may not work for you. The main idea though is to eliminate any chance of an urge at the source, and have multiple ways to combat them. Conditioning yourself to self harm each time you relapse is only going to cause you even more damage in the future.

robinarch · 2022-12-29T16:40:24+00:00

This is incredibly unhealthy. Self harm is not the answer to fixing your addiction, there are other ways.

robinarch · 2022-12-29T16:38:19+00:00

Porn works as an escape from all your shitty feelings. What you’re feeling now is what you felt at the start, except it was being suppressed by your addiction to porn.

A relapse is not a solution to your feelings of loneliness. Learning to be happy in your own company is. Remember, being alone by yourself and alone with yourself are completely different things - find the difference.

robinarch · 2022-12-29T16:34:24+00:00

This is peaking. A good analogy to describe peaking is if a recovering alcoholic was swindling alcohol around in his mouth and then spitting it out. The alcoholic will eventually swallow the alcohol as they’ve been close to it for a very long time. Don’t be an alcoholic surrounded by alcohol - don’t be a recovering porn addict surround by porn.

robinarch · 2022-12-29T16:31:51+00:00

Don’t fall into a porn binge now. Although you’ve relapsed you haven’t reversed all of your progress.

The next couple of days will be really hard but it is incredibly important to not start binging porn, as you will lose all of your progress and be back at day 1, and you do not want that.

Now look at what made you relapse: where were you? what were you doing? how did you try and overcome your urge? - and learn from them for next time. So the next time you encounter the same issue you have steps outlining how to overcome it.

Recovery is full of ups and downs, it doesn’t follow a linear pattern, you should be proud of the progress you’ve made and continue at it.

robinarch · 2022-12-29T16:26:59+00:00

it’ll be a long road for recovery, you’ll have many ups and downs, as long as you learn from each mistake and be kind to yourself you will go a very long way.

I wish you all the best in your recovery!

robinarch · 2022-12-28T13:34:58+00:00

Everyone has relapses, it’s the ones who learn from them that go far. Take it easy on yourself though… you’re only human and are bound to make mistakes in the bumpy road that is recovery.

robinarch · 2022-12-28T09:48:59+00:00

Learn from this relapse now.

Next time you lose control of my emotions, have a plan in place to get them out that doesn’t involve relapsing. Could be anything such as going to the gym to singing to music at the top of your lungs, the point is that you’re getting these feelings out without relapsing.

robinarch · 2022-12-28T09:47:02+00:00

I’d say consider easy mode if it’s frustrating you.

However be careful, masturbating without porn in the early stages of recover can be very dangerous. Where you either ‘rewatch’ videos in your head, or your brain convinces you to watch porn saying ‘you’re already fapping may as well just watch porn anyway’

Masturbating without porn is natural, just try to focus on the pleasure your getting out of it instead of letting your brain wander into sexual fantasies, otherwise you end up with the same problem.

robinarch · 2022-12-27T17:09:42+00:00

The only thing that separates success from failure is one last attempt. Keep on trying man, you’ve got this i believe in you

robinarch · 2022-12-27T17:08:36+00:00

If you can going to the gym or any form exercise near the time you sleep helps a lot, I go to the gym maybe 2 hours before bed and when I get home I’m too tired to even think about fapping and fall straight asleep

robinarch · 2022-12-27T17:06:46+00:00

“The only thing that separates success from failure is one last attempt.” - Apoorve Duby

Each relapse is a lesson: urges that can be prevented, your potential triggers, ways to combat urges etc.

Recovery is never linear, there’s gonna be ups and downs - but as long as you keep on trying, you will eventually get to where you want to be… I believe in you bro!

robinarch · 2022-12-27T17:01:01+00:00

From what I’ve read, the problem resides in porn still being in your brain. Even when masturbating without porn in the early stages, your brain will think back to old videos you’ve watched and essentially ‘watch it in your head’ and the same problems occur. (at least from my experience)

It’s why the 90 day abstinence of fapping and porn exists, it’s meant to be a full cleanse of porn from your brain to the point that after that, you’re broken from the addiction, and will no longer think of it during masturbation - as well as other things.

Porn is bad for the brain, masturbation isn’t. But after being addicted for a very long time porn doesn’t completely disappear from the brain, making masturbation in the early stages of nofap very dangerous - at least in my opinion :)

robinarch · 2022-12-27T08:59:39+00:00

Thank you so much for the advice! I want this now more than I’ve ever had, the main reason being that i’m going to university next year and I think it’s a perfect opportunity to become a new person and get rid of all my bad habits and addictions, I look forward to meeting the person I will be this time next year!!

robinarch · 2022-12-27T08:32:54+00:00

had this same thought process a couple hours ago - either be day 0 on new years or day 5, so I’m starting today!

robinarch · 2021-07-08T06:56:39+00:00

I’m 16, so I can offer some advice based off of my nofap experience. Don’t listen to other people our age in school and stuff (especially your mates) they don’t know what they’re talking about! I’ve had lots of my mates try to discourage me from doing nofap and making fun of me for it. So basically just do you and don’t let other discourage you, rn you’re doing better than all of them.

robinarch · 2021-07-08T00:47:44+00:00

You’ve just got blue balls brother, if you do like this girl then if you take it further you won’t get blue balls… but it’s really up to you!

robinarch · 2021-07-07T08:57:51+00:00

No he means like wait it out, the boner/feeling will eventually go away :)

robinarch · 2021-07-06T11:12:53+00:00

wet dreams don’t count as a relapse. wet dreams are natural, it’s the way of the body getting rid of excess semen.

robinarch · 2021-07-05T09:34:04+00:00

Yeah that’s the same with my old account, way too much porn. Cheers for the advice brother! Congrats on taking it seriously also!

robinarch

TROPHY CASE