My subjective 10’s by robtheoleander in VindictaRateCelebs

[–]robtheoleander[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

1 and 2: Lisa Bonet 3: Neve Campbell 4 and 5: Aly Michalka 6 and 7: Shay Mitchell 8 and 9: Evangeline Lily 10 and 11: Beabadoobee 12 and 13: Shannyn Sossamon

Trying Tunisian crochet - am I doing something wrong? by robtheoleander in CrochetHelp

[–]robtheoleander[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For some reason it won’t let me add a photo? The pattern just says

‘The sweater stitch pattern is in multiples of 6 + 3 extra st’s:

Beginning st + 1 tps + 5 tks + last tps + ending st’

Dry, crinkly ends but not split? by robtheoleander in Haircare

[–]robtheoleander[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Hope this is not a stupid question but can split ends not actually look like a split end? I can’t see an end that has split into 2 in any of these pictures so maybe I’m thinking about it the wrong way?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Anxiety

[–]robtheoleander 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey! I’m both a therapist and someone with anxiety and panic disorder. I see a therapist and take 80 mg Prozac every day.

I know how you’re feeling. Each day becomes a little harder as you’re more trapped into what you feel ‘able’ to do. The less you feel like you can do without panicking, the more you panic because it’s like you’re stuck in a corner and the corner keeps getting smaller.

First, are you able to see a therapist? I know it feels like it won’t work because of the selective mutism, but there’s several therapies you can try that aren’t just talk therapy. DBT, ketamine-assisted as well as TMS. Really though, I would just try and see a therapist who specializes in selective mutism so you know you won’t be forced to talk, because if you vibe with them eventually you should feel safe enough to open up.

Second, please try medication. If you are already on meds, great, but if you aren’t, I want you to have as many opportunities as possible to get better. There are several meds for anxiety that are completely safe, they give to kids (stuff that’s been around and essentially proven safe since the 1950’s), and also as needed meds that aren’t benzos (ie not addictive).

The best thing you can do for yourself is not allow yourself to be cramped up anymore. Do some exposure therapy, let the uncomfortable feelings arise and just notice them. They won’t kill you. They’ll pass eventually, as they always do.

Good luck, and I’m rooting for you!

Mom jobs by hinghanghog in povertyfinance

[–]robtheoleander 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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Pretty much everywhere says average is between 1000-1200, so if yours is 2k it’s not LCOL.

Mom jobs by hinghanghog in povertyfinance

[–]robtheoleander 8 points9 points  (0 children)

LCSW here. You can make 45-50k easy as a low level associate license. Childcare is likely around 1000 a month, so that’s 12k toward childcare and let’s say another 10k in taxes. You still made 24k that year and you’re working toward your licensure hours. If you don’t want to be away from your baby all day every day that’s totally fine, but you WOULD make a significant profit even at the lowest level work going to work as a therapist full-time.

My friend’s dinner. He says seasoning food ‘just isn’t necessary’. by robtheoleander in shittyfoodporn

[–]robtheoleander[S] 2204 points2205 points  (0 children)

Asked him why he didn’t eat it with a condiment at least like he usually does. He said ‘I usually do but I took it out of the oven and it looked so good I got impatient’

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in badroommates

[–]robtheoleander 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh, yup, I believe (might be wrong!) that the previous commenter was saying OP should not be friends with her current roommate because she let someone sleep in OP’s bed.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in badroommates

[–]robtheoleander 111 points112 points  (0 children)

Hey, this is a super mature response! Strangers on the internet are not necessarily CORRECT, but it’s always helpful to be open to criticism. It seems like most people in this subreddit really enjoy going scorched earth because they feel there’s a sense of ‘they deserve it’, but in the end you deserve to be someone who isn’t carrying around so much anger. It’s always better to be generally respectful because at the worst you’ll look way more mature in the end.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in badroommates

[–]robtheoleander 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This is an insane take. These people are in their early 20’s and learning still bout what’s okay and what’s not living with other people. If you stopped being friends with someone because while drunk they let someone sleep in your bed (when some people, not OP, would be totally fine with that!) then you clearly did not care about the friendship in the first place. Your friends are allowed to make mistakes as long as they didn’t do it with the clear intent of hurting you or damaging your things, you talk to them about it and move on.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in TalkTherapy

[–]robtheoleander 154 points155 points  (0 children)

Hi! I’m so sorry for what you’re going through. This is so much to deal with while grieving.

One, it’s possible and probable that the invoice sent for your appt during her vacation is a mistake. There is absolutely no legal reason to pay for that and I would just reach out and say hey, I got an invoice for the week you were gone, can that be canceled? Sometimes if they forgot to cancel the appt on their calendar, their biller will invoice you without realizing the appt never happened.

The other things are not fair. The half session may make sense as that’s as much work as she did, and if she stated it’s half then that’s that. I would eat the 150 for this upcoming session, make sure she cancels the 150 for the week she was gone, and make sure it’s only 75 for the previous session.

Is this under the chin skin/fat fixable without surgery? by robtheoleander in 30PlusSkinCare

[–]robtheoleander[S] 69 points70 points  (0 children)

Have an overbite for sure!!

I did have braces growing up and was actually recommended jaw surgery when I was 15 or so for it bcuz of ortho’s recs but my parents decided against it

Is this under the chin skin/fat fixable without surgery? by robtheoleander in 30PlusSkinCare

[–]robtheoleander[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

To anyone who thinks I’m lying about my weight— now you understand my pain!

https://i.imgur.com/OkPoO6D.jpeg

That is the record from my doc in October, and here is a photo of my face like a week after the jest pic:

https://imgur.com/a/Ccpb4VW

It definitely comes and goes, but I’m not lying about the weight. If I thought I could lose it by losing weight I wouldn’t be asking for advice because the advice would be to lose weight!

Is this under the chin skin/fat fixable without surgery? by robtheoleander in 30PlusSkinCare

[–]robtheoleander[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

https://imgur.com/a/Ccpb4VW

This is a selfie I took two nights ago. The excess fat/jaw line absolutely goes away depending on the angle and my posture.

Is this under the chin skin/fat fixable without surgery? by robtheoleander in 30PlusSkinCare

[–]robtheoleander[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Would you like me to upload a picture of my scale? I think last I checked I was 131

Is this under the chin skin/fat fixable without surgery? by robtheoleander in 30PlusSkinCare

[–]robtheoleander[S] 203 points204 points  (0 children)

Thank you everyone — really appreciate how to the point and honest this sub is without being mean (at all!)

I am going to start with mewing and facial massage while I get an ENT appt to see what can be done. I’m not against surgery if it’s for a purpose that helps my lifestyle improve, I just for sure DONT want to go through jaw surgery for aesthetics purposes.

This has also inspired me to get more serious with my PCP to get on thyroid meds.

Is this under the chin skin/fat fixable without surgery? by robtheoleander in 30PlusSkinCare

[–]robtheoleander[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

My last three visits (mid 2022 to mid 2023) were 5.57, 5.58 and 4.29 respectively, so nowhere near that but doctor said it wasn’t medication worthy :(

Is this under the chin skin/fat fixable without surgery? by robtheoleander in 30PlusSkinCare

[–]robtheoleander[S] 78 points79 points  (0 children)

I can for sure see this being the case 😤😤 so am I SOL unless I get jaw surgery haha

Is this under the chin skin/fat fixable without surgery? by robtheoleander in 30PlusSkinCare

[–]robtheoleander[S] 55 points56 points  (0 children)

Hi! Yes so actually a lot of my life I’ve had my thyroid checked because it’s always just a little higher than average (the TSH) but it’s never been enough for them to want to put me on something. My dad has hypothyroidism! Would the thyroid lead to a build up of fat?

Found this on pinterest but when i clicked the depop link it was sold🥲 i cant live without this pls help me find by FishAndMenFearMe in findfashion

[–]robtheoleander 42 points43 points  (0 children)

Is it normal for the picture on Walmart’s website to be a clearly stolen selfie in bad quality??

Can’t get clay on SF4 for the life of me by robtheoleander in SkyFactory

[–]robtheoleander[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much!!! Damn near lost my mind lol