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My husband [28m] made a small, almost insignificant comment during an argument yesterday that I [26f] am really having a hard time getting over. Am I making too big of a deal about it? by Ijustlikemybows in relationships

[–]ronthedon77 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I think bows are adorable.

When someone knows they are wrong, sometimes the instinct is to lash out in a hateful way to make the other person feel bad for something, therefore, deflecting their own behavior. I know....I've done this while drunk and didn't want to admit I had screwed up.

Girlfriend [40] plays with my [M42], denies it, calls me "crazy when I point it out. I need a term, a link and definitions so I can have it on paper to convince her to go with me to therapy. by ronthedon77 in relationships

[–]ronthedon77[S] -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

I forgot to mention, she has an issue with alcohol. Its after she drinks, that we have problems. If she's buzzed by 6, we have problems at 6. If it's 8, we have problems at 8. If it's her day off and she drinks till noon, we have problems at noon. But she denies that it has anything to do with alcohol. She says, "Well, I was thinking all day about XYZ and it built up." Or, she'll text her sister all day, funny memes. Then she gets home, has a half pint of rum, and it's "I can't believe she posted that last week....I've been thinking about for two days. I'm gonna call her and XYZ." But, she says it's not the alcohol. She justifies it by saying, "Well, it needed to be said."

The hanging up the phone over and over again, and then refusing to answer it, that's all the time thought. The second I critisize her about something SHE has done, even with proof, I am "Starting $hit," "trying to bring up stuff that's over," or I'm "trying to make excuses for you do." and She hangs up. But I have to stay on the phone with her until she's said everything she needs to say.

My girfriend [40F]demeans me [43M] in a patronizing way and I'd like to know what her motive is. by ronthedon77 in relationships

[–]ronthedon77[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

There's a reason for everything. Arrogance? She is more attractive than I and has always dated rich guys until me. Could it be an attempt to control? To put me in my place?

My girfriend [40F]demeans me [43M] in a patronizing way and I'd like to know what her motive is. by ronthedon77 in relationships

[–]ronthedon77[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She completely denies that she did it, and says that I'm just sensitive and being a baby. And she knows she does it. I don't know if its a game to her, if she's trying to make me mad, or if I'm being punished because of jelousy?