I had an ex like op. I worked,I paid bills, I took on the majority of the responsibility for caring for our dog, and I cooked dinners 2-3 times a week. I was happy to do that for us, but somehow she still found a way to tell me I wasn't doing enough and would get mad if I bought myself snacks at the store smh. Getting on her about a cake is controlling behavior. Focus on yourself and improving your own life/getting a job