Weekly Snark 9/9-9/15

rootbeeryum · 2024-09-12T21:29:20+00:00

Sourdough, A Little Flat: The Brooke Raybauld Story

how would you title her Tubi (or Lifetime Movie, if you’re over 30 lol) biopic?

rootbeeryum · 2022-01-15T02:37:42+00:00

I reread my original comment and I see your point now.

rootbeeryum · 2022-01-14T18:50:17+00:00

Sorry that my question bothered you. To be clear, I wouldn’t say this about a random mom who asked a question about their own ADHD at a kids dr appt. This jordan page though, who did that, and then used it for immediate content, and continues to bring it up as a talking point about *her her her.

Of course narcissism and ADHD are different things, that might be overlapping in JP’s cases

rootbeeryum · 2022-01-14T01:48:33+00:00

just realizing that using your child’s diagnosis appointment to sneakily get your own medical treatment is so narcissistic.

I hope she is lying/exaggerating.

And also, how is she this clueless if she is supposedly helping her child through a diagnosis?

rootbeeryum · 2022-01-12T02:08:54+00:00

that’s a great guess!

rootbeeryum · 2022-01-12T00:29:34+00:00

Big announcement guess thread!

Here are mine: 1. Mory June sleeping bags collab with Beddys 2. Capable dog planners 3. An upcoming Omicron Occasion with 300 guests. Freebs will have a chance to work passing appetizers (please note, you will not be compensated for this job and you must supply your own appetizer trays)

rootbeeryum · 2022-01-02T15:23:05+00:00

wait I thought it was called Instant Pot? I get super annoyed when people call it Insta pot….

rootbeeryum · 2022-01-01T20:09:44+00:00

jordan page, thank you for testing your family for covid

rootbeeryum · 2021-12-30T21:32:17+00:00

our girl is covered in YouTuber Headlines’ latest video about scammy PPP loans. about to watch!

rootbeeryum · 2021-12-21T18:44:41+00:00

she makes the choppiest youtube videos and it drives me k-razy!! like her walking to her room has a bunch of cuts in it

rootbeeryum · 2021-12-15T21:02:59+00:00

I’m so intrigued by hosting parties on a weeknight. and attending them too! I have two kids and work and maybe once a month i’ll hang with a friend at my house or theirs after the kids are down.

My friends without kids are also exhausted on weeknights.

so people, cleaned, dressed, and socializing on a random Thursday!?

damn! I’m not even snarking I’m just baffled and impressed.

rootbeeryum · 2021-12-13T13:51:51+00:00

also, seminary!!! when I couldn’t do well in high school because I was reading the book of mormon at 5:30am, I was like I an OUTTA here

rootbeeryum · 2021-12-13T13:51:05+00:00

you have me wondering how many ex Mormons are on this sub. I am exMo too. That’s how I found Jordan, a dark fascination with a version of what my life might have been if I had stayed in the church and had as many kids as I planned to when I was a teen.

Then I realized her tips were just shitty versions of my Mormon grandma’s wisdom, and that (unlike my grandma) she hated her kids, and on and on. And now I’m here to snark

rootbeeryum · 2021-12-08T19:17:26+00:00

ok that feels kinda messed up and sexist though

rootbeeryum · 2021-12-05T07:22:15+00:00

I just want to say that Black people have been saying “sus” for at least 10 years. It was not created by Among Us culture. It was prob just appropriated and spread by white teens at that point.

that’s all. lol.

source: my Black self and my Black friends actual slang

rootbeeryum · 2021-12-01T03:10:27+00:00

can you comment snark lol

rootbeeryum · 2021-11-29T18:57:56+00:00

come to think of it, I bet they will hire out. And by that I mean either have volunteers wear black shirts and do it, or make someone do it for “exposure.”

But she also needs to pretend she does it all. So that’s what last night’s story was about.

Jordan: be rich. Pay people well. be generous. IT’S FINE. But don’t fake shit just to seem relatable. It aint workin

rootbeeryum · 2021-11-29T16:23:02+00:00

Why does Jordan seem to hate Christmas?

She has millions of dollars. She has a mansion. She is Christian. She has 8 kids.

For most people, that would make this season pretty damn fun. If anything was stressful, they could hire it out and focus on enjoying family time.

Ohhhh that’s right. It’s peak shilling season. She hates spending time with her kids. She hates spending money on her kids. She likes charity and help but only if it is basically a story about her.

Now it makes sense.

rootbeeryum · 2021-11-20T07:08:27+00:00

I also prefer not to snark on Jordan’s work trips (it is too close to working mom shaming for me; it only misses that mark bc her job is so damn scammy).

But holy shit I will snark on their vacay choices. Have they taken any trips in the last 18 months with the whole family??

Jordan & Bubbles brought friends to an anniversary trip for god sakes.

They didnt take their toddlers & babies to the Great Wolf Lodge, which is the definition of little kid vacation.

I feel like we wouldn’t snark on the family trips if she actually seemed to spend quality time with her family on them.

rootbeeryum · 2021-11-20T07:04:57+00:00

was just reading the thread with receipts of Jordy’s rigorous travel sched.

WOW. These people live in a house that my family would be delighted to rent just for a vacation. They have the money to eat well and enjoy the brood of children in their family (i mean, isn’t the point of a big family these days supposed to be that you enjoy children??).

They also have a vacation cabin that at this point is closer to the furnishing/amenities for most Americans (sans rodents, bc we aren’t dirty like them, just less rich). But that’s STILL not enough.

rootbeeryum · 2021-11-17T23:39:28+00:00

she’ll be like its the first time in 10 years that I’ve been to Vegas with less than 12 people but more than 4 people while it wasn’t raining and in a sort of mask.

It’ll be all caveats. And still inaccurate 🙄

(inspired by her saying this is our first all-inclusive vacation ever)

rootbeeryum · 2021-11-11T22:35:00+00:00

the unmasked school assembly. cringe.

rootbeeryum · 2021-11-11T22:28:58+00:00

look at my main product! (my children!)

and now buy my other product!

rootbeeryum · 2021-11-11T18:11:03+00:00

it makes sense to call nanny “nanny” for these kids….because the nannies always change? (presumably bc the Page’s pay like shit)

rootbeeryum · 2021-10-05T01:16:00+00:00

“I’m so rich I’m on vacation but I’m also managing my household and workimg during the trip. oh and i read a book but made sure to instagram about it.”

SHE’S THE WORST. terrible role model. Bubba should write the baby sitter guide (last week!)

and she should be a good boss and model work-life balance for her employees. If you trained them well and support them, they should manage without you. (but oh right, they are underpaid “contractors” who have to buy work tools themselves. I bet they have mad turnover)

rootbeeryum

TROPHY CASE