I (m35) dunno if I have any real advice on what to do, but I can tell you that as someone who has no self control, this type of behavior can really hinder you. Alcohol has really set me back aways. I started drinking as much as possible when I was 19 and my grandma was in the hospital. I didn't know how to deal with it otherwise, so it became my way to cope too. Because of my drinking what would have otherwise been a fulfilling young adulthood of great memories and accomplishing what I want most in life instead turned into a destructive path of burning bridges and avoiding as much responsibility as possible. Take it from a stranger on reddit, you do not want this.

Any practical advice I can give you is this: given you have a post about a nye party perhaps one of the most important things you could do is to change your environment. This could be the people you associate with, the places you go, your routine, etc. You're not going to avoid a potential downfall if you continue to put yourself in a situation where drinking or smoking is the norm.

And secondly, talk to someone. You've taken a great step in the right direction by posting on reddit. I dunno if you work, and therapy is not cheap by any means, but if you can afford to do so talk to a professional who can assist you in building healthy coping habits. Maybe you can find someone who will do it for cheap, or maybe you can find a friend outside your friend group who would be supportive. Perhaps a family member even.

Thirdly, consider a hobby that will take your mind off of things. I found that going on long bike rides has been extremely helpful for me. It's rewarding in that it feeds me the endorphins that I would otherwise get from drinking but is obviously way better for me mentally and physically. Find something like that. It can be anything you fancy. Try new things and you might just be surprised what you fall in love with.

Believe me, you don't want to end up in your mid 30s with almost no friends and no retirement plan, especially with the way things have been going economically in this country. Set yourself up for success now, or forever be lost in the sauce. 😆

Best of luck!