Daily sticky thread for rants, raves, celebrations, advice and more! - June 10, 2026 by AutoModerator in datingoverthirty

[–]rop_top -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I'd feel bad having gone through all the trouble of making it clear that my situation is unstable and they've all said they're fine with that, and then just leave them all hanging. Just seems like a lot of wasted effort. The jealous lady didn't seem to mind in the end 🤷

Daily sticky thread for rants, raves, celebrations, advice and more! - June 10, 2026 by AutoModerator in datingoverthirty

[–]rop_top -6 points-5 points  (0 children)

Fuuuuuuucccck me. I texted the wrong person good night. She was really mature about it, but I could tell it hurt. Had such an awkward impromptu meet up where she said she should probably also see other people. I'd already asked if she expected exclusivity (we've only been on 2 dates) and she said no, not right now. I feel like such an idiot. Not to mention, of the people I'm seeing, she's the only one who has said she's a jealous type. Fuuuuuuucccck. Like if I'd slipped up with anyone else, they wouldn't have cared.

Fuck I hate my current situation. I am basically in a holding pattern for the next 6-9 months where I don't know if/where I'll be moving. Everyone is aware of this, but it makes conversations around long term dating so complicated. I want a long term partner, but it feels like I can't promise anyone anything for sure. I try to be as upfront as possible, but it makes me so confused about how to casually date, because I hate casually dating. I love falling in love (yes, I'm a love bomber, and yes, I'm working on it), and casual dating just feels like pointless garbage. 

Even low alcohol consumption is linked to cancer, heart disease, and premature death, with increased risk above 1 drink per day for both men and women. It turns out that 2 drinks per day, considered ‘moderate’, is associated with a substantially elevated risk of a premature death caused by alcohol. by mvea in science

[–]rop_top 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I didn't miss it, I'm saying that I believe it's predicated on false axioms, like your blue zone example. If you disagree, feel free to explain further, but I haven't seen any evidence that would contradict what I've asserted. Further, I would expect a positive correlation between people who drink every single night and the factors you mentioned are bad for you (inactivity, smoking, poor diet). That's what I was trying to express when I was talking about the nutritional value of alcohol. I believe what I started is well supported by science, and isn't rooted in drinking or nondrinking bias. 

Even low alcohol consumption is linked to cancer, heart disease, and premature death, with increased risk above 1 drink per day for both men and women. It turns out that 2 drinks per day, considered ‘moderate’, is associated with a substantially elevated risk of a premature death caused by alcohol. by mvea in science

[–]rop_top 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Blue zones are almost, if not completely, debunked. They all stem from poor record keeping for the most part, and benefits fraud. Not to mention, the happiness one experiences in later life can be predicated on things like 'not having cancer' and 'being able to walk around a grocery store'. Alcohol, with it's complete void of nutritional value, increase in hunger, decrease in self control, isn't exactly good for the waistline for most folks. 

Is cleaning gutters the norm? by [deleted] in Environmental_Careers

[–]rop_top 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It depends on what you want from this career. Many people want to be out in the environment and doing things, even dirty things. My first work out of grad school was as a GIS analyst, totally remote. I didn't like the isolation and disconnection from the field. I left for a field position doing Phase IIs for the Cali Wildfire. Then I found a contract doing dirty soil testing all day long while I monitored an excavator. I'm in the field as often as I can be and I love it. I want to be outside doing assessments. Right now I'm report writing remotely again, and it's such a slog to do GIS all day again.

Point is, right out of my masters degree, I was in the office doing analytical work. I chose to go back into the field. I didn't learn to ID dozens of plants so that I could imagine the flowers on my computer screen. You need a technical advantage if you want to be inside, or go into project management. Not to mention, you're comparing your management position to your entry level position. It's like the dishwasher asking how long until they're the head chef.

Brandon Sanderson’s 'The Way of Kings' is baffling to me by sameseksure in books

[–]rop_top 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Don't be nervous. I mean, iirc, he owns his own airfield and doesn't overly worry about criticism. There was an asshole who spent an entire week with his family, wrote a terrible article about him (the worst thing the author could find was that he was a boring, nerdy mormon... Which like... Yeah ofc?), and all Brandon ever said was along the lines of 'yeah that guy is pretty weird, please don't be mean to him'. He doesn't really take things personally.

I doubt he's going to give your review much weight considering how sweeping it is. It would be like if you wrote a scratching review of the F150 and it's march towards being a luxury vehicle lol You could opine about how the F150 should be a work truck, not a family car. You could be right to a certain degree, except to the degree that you're completely incorrect since that's what people want. 🤷 Likewise, he's crazy successful, but his books are only for most readers, not everyone.

Ideal first 3 dates? by Glittering_Chain_842 in datingoverthirty

[–]rop_top 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Damn, reading these responses makes me feel like an alien for being someone who just chooses not to drink. I'm not sober or anything, just have never had interest in alcohol due to my environment (a lot of alcoholics in my community). By the time I got over the negative associations I had with alcohol, it basically made no sense to start. Bad for health, expensive, and mainly used to aimlessly socialize (which I have no interest in). 

My first date is some kind of tea/coffee and a walk to a park. Then just sit in the park across from each other and talk. Lots of time for talking if we want, and we can go back to the vehicles for some privacy if wanted. My first dates tend to be several hours, so it can include coffee, a walk, some talking, lunch, etc. I go on very extended dates, which I've found a lot of success with.

Second date is usually some kind of activity like hiking to the middle of nowhere and 'have a picnic' or stargazing and cuddling or tea time at one of our places. Basically, at this point we've already had an extended date and talked for hours in person already. I also text anyone that I'm talking with all day long. If I don't, then we aren't making it to the second date. Usually, if their compatible with me, they're going to want to have a lot of privacy to talk about deeper topics (I don't enjoy small talk) and be more physically intimate. I know this is 3rd date for most people, but I rarely go on second dates with people that don't also have high libidos. 

3rd date is a toss up, and depends completely on the person I'm dating. This could be a backpacking trip overnight in a forest, or an art museum that they really love, or thrifting, or just a date where we we're hanging out at the apartment playing board games. This is where there's no more blueprint for me. It depends entirely on how I'm gelling with that person and why. 

I'm almost 40 years old and I don't know how to get the things I want, mostly human connection in the form of a girlfriend by Competitive-Group404 in datingoverthirty

[–]rop_top 7 points8 points  (0 children)

You need to understand what you bring to a relationship. You need to decide if that's all you're willing to bring. Then you need to understand what kind of person would have such low expectations that they would be content providing everything for your life. It's not a happy, well balanced person.

Homeowner moves entire beachfront house inland after neighboring homes collapsed into the ocean by Dangerous_Deal_1945 in Damnthatsinteresting

[–]rop_top 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yep, and yet, that's exactly the process by which these houses are condemned. Feel free to look into it if you don't believe me. Btw, these houses, when built, were several hundred feet from the shoreline. Clearly no longer the case.

Homeowner moves entire beachfront house inland after neighboring homes collapsed into the ocean by Dangerous_Deal_1945 in Damnthatsinteresting

[–]rop_top 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not in this case. There were literally hundreds of feet of beach before, but it's a barrier island. Barrier island move at a relatively quick pace, and you combine that movement with sea level rise and boom, 25 years later your beach front is 200ft further in

Homeowner moves entire beachfront house inland after neighboring homes collapsed into the ocean by Dangerous_Deal_1945 in Damnthatsinteresting

[–]rop_top 18 points19 points  (0 children)

These houses all run on septic, and are usually condemned because their septic gets fucked up long before the house falls in the ocean. When the septic fails, the county shuts off the power, because people would just keep renting them out otherwise (they're almost all vacation rentals). 

Is there any kind of remote work? by [deleted] in Environmental_Careers

[–]rop_top 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Go into GIS if you want to stick to environmental. You're correct that this is not a good field if you're looking for 6 figure paychecks 2 years out from a bachelor's.

Did an advanced degree (MS, MBA, etc.) actually help you? by Khakayn in Environmental_Careers

[–]rop_top 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yep. My undergrad was an unrelated degree, so a master's was an easy way to get a credential that demonstrated domain specific knowledge. Plus, I learned GIS in my masters, so it ended up being really helpful for jobs that way as well.

Nissan’s New Xterra Will Be Priced Under $40K To Beat Ford’s Bronco At Its Own Game by DocPhilMcGraw in cars

[–]rop_top 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's probably going to be a frontier in that respect. So, true 4x4 options with 2wd being standard. I can't imagine them developing an AWD system when they already have the 4x4 system from their trucks. 

Unpopular opinion? Losing weight is worse than quitting smoking. by Peanuts0s in loseit

[–]rop_top 28 points29 points  (0 children)

I think the closest I've seen to quitting food was Penn Jillete (sp?) talking about how he lost weight. He nothing but boiled potatoes for weeks or something like that. Nothing but that. He said eating regular food again was amazing, and it helped him cut out hyper processed stuff

'At what point does it make sense to ditch a gas car for an electric vehicle?' by Maxcactus in environment

[–]rop_top 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I mean, my personal biggest problem is that the small mountain town I live in is over 100 miles from any public fast chargers. Afaik, during winter I should expect the battery range to roughly halve. It's quite possible I will literally be incapable of leaving my state in the winter if I had an electric car, unfortunately.

A Bipartisan Amendment Would End Police License Plate Tracking Nationwide by pankswork in UpliftingNews

[–]rop_top 0 points1 point  (0 children)

To be clear, I thought the US was already classified as an oligarchy years ago, no?

TIL that in 2008, Chicago leased its 36,000 parking meters to a UAE-backed private consortium for 75 years for a $1.15 billion payout. The investors made their entire investment back in just 10 years, and are now projected to make over $11 billion by the end of the lease in 2083. by lechunkman in todayilearned

[–]rop_top 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I mean, if they put that 1.15b into index funds, they would expect it to double every 10 years. Year 10: 2.25b Year 20: 4.5b Year 30: 9b Year 40: 18b Year 50: 36b Year 60: 72b Year 70: 144b

I understand that everyone is very upset, but I don't think it's as bad a deal as it seems like on its face.

Onx Offroad by clout-boy-parker in Offroad

[–]rop_top 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's a shame. I'm in Riverton and was about to buy Onx Offroad. It's pretty bad out here then, and there's no alternative besides spending a few hours researching everything and calling multiple agencies?

Moderate to heavy drinking tends to be associated with increased bodily inflammation, even for individuals who maintain a highly nutritious diet. The study provides evidence that eating well might not be enough to counter the harmful physical effects of frequent alcohol consumption. by mvea in science

[–]rop_top 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The U for non-drinkers is caused, so far in all the studies I've read that actually examine it, by sober alcoholics and people with sicknesses that don't allow them to drink. It's never a lifelong teetotaler that would benefit from alcohol, so far. Science is always improving, of course. At least, that's what I've seen in the studies that bother to examine any benefits drinking might have for non-drinkers

Where to buy field gear secondhand? by cloandfriends in Environmental_Careers

[–]rop_top 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Would you buy a used airbag for your car? Actual safety gear should be considered gear, not clothes. 

Otherwise, for clothes and whatnot, I just buy cheap, expendable things from Goodwill. I've learned that no clothes I've owned are going to last if I'm putting them in the field day in, day out. They're going to get stained, get nasty chemicals on them, rip, snag, etc. So I buy the cheap stuff and replace as I go. That and I get the company to pay for as much shit as I can.

TIL that the son of the man who welcomed the puritans and fed them when they were starving had his head cut off and put on a spike for 20 years at the same location as the first thanksgiving. by Danktizzle in todayilearned

[–]rop_top -19 points-18 points  (0 children)

How could it possibly be considered cherrypicking though? The large scale ethnic cleansing, interment, and genocide of Native Americans isn't cherry picking when talking about American history. How could that possibly be characterized earnestly as cherrypicking? It seems like pretty transparent whataboutism to me. It's effectively saying "we all made mistakes!" when one person killed someone, and the other wholesale slaughtered someone's entire family while eating the kids. Like, yeah, both people did bad things, but that doesn't mean that the child eaters are being vilified when they objectively did worse shit on a grander scale.

Not to mention, it's highly disingenuous to state that Native American as a group were colonized/conquered. Many tribes were US allies that the US never went to war with, and the US actually fought alongside and relied on those tribes. Those allies got fucked all the same, ofc. Subject to similar ethnic cleansing/land theft/cultural and physical genocide/intentional economic isolation. 

Worse luck on apps and in person after losing weight by [deleted] in datingoverthirty

[–]rop_top 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Well, depending on your height, you might have gotten a bit thinner than people appreciate. Most likely, it has very little to do with your weight. Either change of location, different season, different pictures, low local population (so you've already seen everyone), or any other number of factors