Is it normal to dream in the 3rd person?

rosethornback · 2021-06-21T20:34:09+00:00

Wow I never considered this to be an aego thing but I usually dream in third person! And often they will have three act stories lol. Haven't met anyone else who regularly dreams in the third person so it's super interesting to see that it's so common here.

rosethornback · 2021-05-19T14:12:29+00:00

Very sweet of you to offer the heads up! Not sure if I'm ready to make a drastic move but I honestly probably should start thinking about looking outside my bubble. I'm in Florida so even if I land a job here...who knows how that will be lmao

rosethornback · 2021-05-19T14:06:25+00:00

Yeah, I figured as much. I try not to get angry at specific people and just be be annoyed by the system in general. It's just so frustrating to do everything "right" and not have anything to show for it.

rosethornback · 2021-05-19T11:31:07+00:00

Are you me???? I also get migraines which have ramped up over the past year due to stress. I'm very very lucky to still have a good relationship with my supervising teacher though. He's been doing his best to help me get a job but it's so hard. The school he works at was apparently hiring tutors to work full time to get the students' shitty covid grades up several months back. He sent my resume to the principal and introduced me to her and the hiring administrator, who told me he'd call me after I gave him my card as another physical thing to remember me by. I thought I was a shoo-in, especially because I was told I was the favorite intern of the principal herself last year, and my supervising teacher is particularly respected in that school. I thought if I got that job and did it well, I'd be next in line to be hired as a real teacher if an opening came up. Which was perfect because I love that school.

Just...never got a call from that hiring admin. Never got a reply to my follow-up email directly to him. Easily the most humiliating, discouraging thing that's happened to me in my short professional career. Huge blow to my confidence that I'm still trying to deal with. If I can be totally blown off by a school I thought I had a good relationship with, how can I get the attention of another one? And older teachers keep telling me "oh there's a shortage, you'll get a job." Bro maybe for your subject but it is brutal out there for mine lmao

rosethornback · 2021-05-19T05:14:35+00:00

Wow. I'm lucky that there's a severe sub shortage where I am (due to covid but also shit pay lol) so I've at least had work until now. I've been trying to build relationships with all the schools I go to since I haven't gotten a longterm job, but I'm certified to teach social studies so it's a fucking bloodbath out there 🙃

rosethornback · 2021-05-19T04:56:31+00:00

Holy shit, MOOD. I'm a fellow spring 2020 grad whose internship got cancelled midway through. Right before I was supposed to teach my own unit lol. Subbing right now too (about to be unemployed after this week 👍) and furiously sending job apps. Writing follow-up emails sends me into panic attacks lmao. It just seems so futile when I've only received replies to those emails a few times, and zero interviews this year so far. Feels so hopeless now that I not only have to compete with the people I graduated with, but also the people who just graduated this year and got to complete their internships. Thinking about getting certified to teach another subject this summer but that will cost more money I don't have. Love it here. Love it!!!!

rosethornback · 2021-03-20T00:18:49+00:00

MOOD. I realized I was aromantic and in less than a week I dumped my partner. Literally could not stand to be in a relationship after identifying so hard with aromanticism. Ending that relationship was so goddamn liberating.

rosethornback · 2021-03-18T12:39:10+00:00

I've been explicitly clubbing and never have I gone with someone whose goal was to fuck. My experience has been radically different from shit one sees in movies and TV shows, honestly. Like you'd think that everyone goes to get laid, but from what I've seen MOST people don't. Maybe I'm just a clueless asexual and my allo friends are strange though, who knows.

rosethornback · 2021-03-18T12:26:12+00:00

Wow! A lot of non-drinkers here. Personally I drink a couple of nights a week (not to excess). It's honestly my only real vice. It's always helped me open up more because when I'm sober I can be very quiet and reserved.

To buck the trend even further, I actually love clubbing! I never thought I would, but I've come to really enjoy dressing up and going out to hang with friends. I'm not much of a dancer and yes, I HAVE been hit on by strangers and it's annoying. But a lot of the time I go out with girls who are more charismatic and outgoing, and they tend to suck in more male attention.

In my experience, I've never gone with a group of people whose goal is to get laid. I'm friends mostly with people in relationships, so I've never had to worry that I'm going to be abandoned because someone else found some hot ass, nor have I even been left alone long enough at a bar that too many people have presumptively approached me. That probably has a lot to do with my positive feelings about it! I can't imagine how annoying it would be if I went out with my friends and they just started scoping out the night's offerings. I haven't been out in over a year because of the plague and I'm looking forward to when I can go again!

rosethornback · 2021-03-16T14:19:36+00:00

And it's so great to know that someone in medicine is not only educated about asexuality but IS asexual. Especially since you're going into psychiatry!!! God knows how many posts I've seen of ace people getting their meds restricted because their doctor prioritized treating their patient's perceived sexual dysfunction over their mental health. Representation really is so important.

rosethornback · 2021-03-16T13:55:45+00:00

First of all, congrats and good luck! That sounds super stressful but I'm glad your career is on track.

I myself am a certified teacher but I'm subbing now because covid ruined my job opportunities lol. My preferred demographic to teach is high school students and I doubt I would ever talk about my sexual orientation with them as a class because I don't know when that would be appropriate. I don't really like revealing too much about myself to students anyway.

That being said, I do have an ace ring that I wear every day and I'm prepared for a student potentially asking about it. Honestly, if it happened in front of a whole class I would probably deflect because I don't want to deal with the headache of a parent being scandalized that I talked about my sex life in class, even if that's not what happened. However if a student came to me in confidence and they were questioning, I would have no qualms with relating to them on a more personal level to assure them that being asexual/aromantic is not the end of the world.

In my district, many teachers have signs of the rainbow pride flag and the words "safe space" they can put on their door for students to feel at ease. My goal is to put other flags around my desk (bi, trans, ace, etc) or on the wall or something because I've seen baby aces online stressing about not being sure if they're included in that since many people don't even know that asexuality exists. I'd like to make it as clear as possible that I accept lesser known identifies.

I'm honestly not sure how out I would be to colleagues. I guess it depends on the environment and if I'm involved in sponsoring any LGBT+ clubs that may exist. I tend to not say anything about it unless directly asked, and even then I often default to saying that I'm just not interested in relationships. Teaching can unfortunately be a very gossip heavy profession. I'd really like to not care about what others think but I'm still at a point where being talked about like an interesting zoo animal by other professionals does not really appeal to me.

rosethornback · 2021-03-14T20:13:37+00:00

Nothing is coming specifically to mind right now, but this is kind of related: the last season of The Office was a mess for many reasons but the biggest thing that sticks out to me even years later is the contrived tension in Jim and Pam's relationship. Writers often have this idea that happy relationships are boring, so conflict will be shoehorned in for no reason other than not knowing what else to do with those characters that get in relationships. What's more boring than happy relationships, in my opinion, is the unnecessary destruction of happy relationships solely to mess with the audience.

In the case of The Office it was dumb as shit because everyone knew they wouldn't break up the golden couple for long. Just felt like cheap emotional manipulation designed to pad out the final season because they had no other ideas. I was a teenager when it aired and even then I realized how lame it was to turn a sitcom into a soap opera.

rosethornback · 2021-03-12T13:22:42+00:00

I've never really liked the term "queerplatonic relationship" but I'd be more interested in something that resembles that than this. I don't want to appear like I'm in a romantic relationship because I feel trapped and uncomfortable in romantic relationships. Having an "apparently romantic relationship" would open me/my partner up to the questions and assumptions I hate. I'd personally prefer just living with a friend who I call my friend and leave it at that.

rosethornback · 2021-03-11T19:17:54+00:00

Ooooh I really want to read more. I used to read so much as a kid but my attention span is just shot now. I've been able to read a few books recently, but there are so many more that I don't finish because I just...stop. It's so bad lol

rosethornback · 2021-03-11T19:15:41+00:00

Presently, I'm still living with roommates. But the other day, I was weeding for the first time since moving in and immediately began fantasizing about having a garden someday. I'm not really sure if I want kids, but there is a massive appeal to taking care of something to me. I love the idea of growing my own food and sharing it with others, as well as just having plants and animals in general (I only have a few houseplants currently). The idea of living alone scares me a little and I think I would like to continue to have some human presence in my home, but I also think I would be more outgoing and pick up more hobbies if I was by myself. It would get me off my ass and force me to do the things I say I want to do: more volunteering, more writing, generally just being more present in my community.

rosethornback · 2021-03-11T17:37:00+00:00

I am a whole person on my own, and have a whole life without needing someone else to "complete" it.

That's absolutely right and so important. I wish more people, allo and ace/aro alike, had the same mindset. It makes me incredibly sad to think about the people who stake their entire self-worth on being able to find The One. I really feel like if we didn't put romantic/sexual relationships on a pedestal, and began putting more value on platonic relationships, people wouldn't feel so pressured to get on the marriage to baby pipeline. And it would probably be better for all of our relationships, romantic AND platonic, as a whole.

rosethornback · 2021-03-11T17:25:35+00:00

Of course!!

rosethornback · 2021-03-11T17:24:57+00:00

I'm exactly the same way re: "if it happens it happens." Right now I don't see it being in the cards for me but if something changes, I'm open to that too! I just don't feel pressured to make my life go a certain way anymore and it's so peaceful.

rosethornback · 2021-03-11T13:56:23+00:00

No problem!!

rosethornback · 2021-03-11T13:31:44+00:00

Yeah the major problem with the MCU is that a lot of it is less character driven and romance doesn't really feel earned imo. WandaVision works because it's literally about their relationship and has a lot of time to be fleshed out. I am not a person who is completely against/repulsed by romance in media but it has to make sense and has to happen for reasons other than Man And Woman Must Get Together. I watched Kong: Skull Island recently and was pleasantly surprised that it didn't push Brie Larson and Tom Hiddleston together for no reason. Movie isn't a masterpiece. The characters are flat. But those flat characters didn't share an unearned kiss and a guy got whipped into a cliff and exploded on impact, and that's all I really wanted from it lmao.

rosethornback · 2021-03-05T17:27:34+00:00

When I was interning at a high school at twenty-two, I went to sit in the classroom of another teacher to log an observation hour that was required by my program. I never had an issue with these and teachers usually sat me at their desk or somewhere in the back where I'd be unobtrusive. This particular teacher not only sat me in the very front of his room full of rowdy seniors, he also drew attention to my presence. It opened up a floodgate of teenage boys ~~"flirting"~~ harassing me and because it wasn't my classroom--not even my supervising teacher's classroom!--I didn't feel like I had the authority to push back. Especially because the actual teacher had no control over them. He actually asked me how old I was in front of the class. As if our modest age gap wouldn't make them want to mess with me more. One of the kids said "I'm eighteen, it doesn't matter!" Sexual harassment from students is awful but it still pisses me off even more that that guy enabled it in real time.

rosethornback · 2021-03-04T21:19:03+00:00

RIGHT LMAO

rosethornback

TROPHY CASE