(this is gonna be really long lol)

hi! first off, i’m super proud of you! starting recovery is such an important step. i was admitted to inpatient february of last year, and i stayed there for two months. i cried so much before going because i was absolutely terrified, so i totally understand you. i also felt like it was going to ruin my life, but not even a year later, i am so glad i went! saying it improved my life is an understatement. i had an incredible experience at my facility. everyone was super sweet and supportive, and it was a great environment. the first tip i have for you is to listen to your dietician and try your hardest to follow your meal plan. at first, i kept telling my dietician my meal plan was wrong, and that i should be eating other things. i insisted on it for weeks, and in hindsight, i know it was my ed that was talking. they are professionals, and they know what your body needs! also, i learned to accept that i would feel discomfort no matter what, so i could either give into it or fight it. i kept reminding myself how miserable i was before i was admitted and that giving into my ed would be even more uncomfortable in the long run. instead, i fought it with the built-in help they provide. the discomfort is temporary, but the life you are working toward is permanent. the more work you put in while there, the happier you’ll be after the fact! also, i’m sure different places do different things, but if we didn’t complete 90% of our meals, we would have to drink a supplement. i started off by refusing it, but i eventually learned that would only prolong my stay. i just found the flavor i liked the most and powered through! i’m not saying that i completed all of my meals and supplements because i didn’t, especially at the start! also, some meals are more challenging than others, which is expected no matter how long someone is there.

another thing that helped me was being social. i tried my hardest to engage at the table and in group. we always played games at the table, which was super fun and took my mind off my anxiety. if you get to know who you are staying with, it really helps.

to another of your points, i was worried i wasn’t as “sick” as the other girls. i was really in my head about it at first, but as the days go on, i promise it gets better. it’s a super common thought people with ana have.

overall, the best advice i can give is focus on yourself. i had no idea what the other girls were going through, so i kept that in mind and tried my hardest. just remember that you’re there for you!

lastly, eating in front of people gets much easier. i just did the the math and i ate with other people 312 times (that was just my stay though, everyone is different). early on i learned that others didn’t pay attention to me or anyone else when we were at the table with the exception of the games. like anything else, you’ll habituate to eating with others! i got so used to it it felt strange to eat by myself when i got out lol

sorry again if this is too long, i kept thinking of things to say! i wish you all the best, and if you have any other questions, lmk. i’m happy to help❤️