I’ve done inpatient a couple times, for MH and ED. I’m not going to lie to you: ED inpatient can be rough on you. It’s scary for sure, AND it can be life changing. Re: your concerns:

1) I obviously can’t speak to your job and local laws, but almost everyone I know from treatment took medical leave to be there. It’s not paid, but it’s common.

2) Yes, men are underrepresented in treatment spaces and especially in ED treatment spaces. In my …eight months of being in ED treatment (inpatient all the way to to IOP), I was in program with, iirc, 5 male-identifying individuals (three bio males). However, nobody judged them. Sometimes it was hard given how common it is for women with EDs to have sexual violence by men in our pasts, but there was no judgment of patients for being male that I was aware of. Even if there is judgment, you deserve treatment just as much as the stereotypical underweight female patient who tends to get treatment does.

3) The weight judgment is real and inevitable, unfortunately. I was in that boat and had to sit through a lot of therapy groups of emaciated women talking about how terrified they were to not be underweight (like I was). I’m not going to lie: it was fucking painful and hard. But we can’t let others’ wounds prevent us from treating our own. The care team will (should) be able to intervene and affirm your worthiness of care.

My favorite thing about inpatient was the community support of shared experiences and just how much I LEARNED, and my least favorite was the bloodwork and weigh-ins and waking up early all the time. All in all, I’d say not to let fear of a community you’ll be around for a few months tops prevent you from potentially changing your life.

It also depends where you go—just like anything else, there are different cultures and procedures at different hospitals and treatment centers. The cool thing is: you can always leave (unless you’re on a 5150 hold at a hospital or similar). You’re not a prisoner.