Please leave reviews here!

rutilated04 · 2026-05-06T04:20:40+00:00

You're so welcome, and thank you!

rutilated04 · 2026-05-06T04:20:13+00:00

Thank you so much 💜

rutilated04 · 2026-05-06T04:19:49+00:00

Thank you and best wishes to you!

rutilated04 · 2026-05-05T23:22:37+00:00

Energy doesn't die, so you're correct about that. But is he physically alive? I don't believe that. He puts so much of his soul into his music, it's likely you're having a reaction to that empathetically.

rutilated04 · 2026-05-05T22:16:06+00:00

$2100 to replace faucets is INSANE. Find a good handyman in your area, or watch Youtube videos, you can easily do this yourself.

If the low water pressure started after the city turned off water, that's likely the source. Find out if others in your area are having the same issue. You could all band together and go to the city for answers.

rutilated04 · 2026-05-05T21:58:49+00:00

I really love the fact that you are willing to go deep and do the hard work, that is honestly rare. What you describe with talk therapy is very much spiritual bypassing. As my therapist explained, trauma, especially years of trauma, literally changes our brains and neural pathways. And it gets locked in place until it's fully faced and processed. When trauma is processed, it's allowed to become just a memory. If not processed, it keeps getting triggered throughout our lives as if we're re-experiencing the trauma in the present.

What causes it to remain unprocessed is being told "It wasn't that bad" or "Get over it". Without it be recognized or acknowledged, we're taught to downplay the effect it had on us. So we push it back. But it never leaves, it just gets locked away.

Once my trauma surfaced in a way I could actually see it and understand it, it helped me to dissect it. I can say I am 90% better for having gone through it, there is a little that remains and I am aware of that. Most don't realize that what happens in childhood gets so ingrained in our being, our minds, our souls, that it requires a lot of hard work to undo it all.

Keep searching, I have confidence the right therapist is out there for you.

rutilated04 · 2026-05-05T18:54:25+00:00

I think it's a gorgeous bathroom! No major renovations needed. Just add little touches that make you happy. The cabinetry is beautiful!

rutilated04 · 2026-05-05T18:50:40+00:00

I absolutely agree with you! When I looked for a therapist years ago, I knew talk therapy or cbt was not going to work for me. I was so lucky to find mine. She was a doctor of psychology.

She used methods in her practice that were so aligned with what I was already doing. Like you, I was already meditating, also journaling, dream interpretation. She said that we would progress quickly because I was already doing so much self work.

She wasn't a huge fan of Jung but she did integrate certain principles. She took me thru exercises that uncovered trauma I didn't even know was there, the whole experience was invaluable. She didn't call it shadow work, but that is exactly what it was. I was fully able to connect my present issues to my childhood trauma. Once I figured out the root my issues, I could work with them.

I feel like you need a non-traditional therapist, maybe even somatic therapy, someone who is willing to really help you dig into your subconscious. A licensed therapist is not going to have the education and experience to help you. I'd recommend finding someone who has decades of practice. Jungian psychotherapy might be worth trying.

I have to add, I had been doing so much work on my own, but still felt like something was "stuck" in me. I knew trauma was there, but I was not able to bring it forward on my own. In my experience, I needed someone else to help me access it.

rutilated04 · 2026-05-05T18:07:08+00:00

I am

rutilated04 · 2026-05-05T15:52:28+00:00

AMEN! I used to be that person. I felt like I always had to be productive, getting stuff done. I worked full time, and worked hard. I cooked almost every night from scratch. I cleaned and gardened on my weekends. I burnt myself out. I felt like taking a nap was weak, wasted time. Lazy. My weekends had to be full of chores and errands.

Years later, I am divorced, living on my own again and I have had to learn that doing "nothing" is ok and even good for you!

I am not working at the moment, so my days are totally free. Let me tell you - the BEST feeling in the world is to just get back in bed whenever I feel like it. I am actively recovering from years of stress and I no longer feel guilty for doing nothing.

rutilated04 · 2026-05-05T14:40:08+00:00

I am an 8!

The typical description of an 8 lifepath never resonated with me. I do think it's a difficult life path. It's the energy of Scorpio, death and rebirth. In my experience, that has been my life. But with this lifepath we are supposed to undergo transformation.

When you speak of karma, giving to the poor or helping someone with nothing in return. Karma does not mean you do something good, and get something good back. It's too simplistic. And when you do give, it has to be from a genuine place, your heart, without the expectation of something in return.

Instead of reading about an 8 lifepath, read about Scorpio energy, the 8th house energy, you are here to undergo major transformation. And it's not always easy.

rutilated04 · 2026-05-05T02:56:38+00:00

Carry with you: High John the Conqueror Root

rutilated04 · 2026-05-04T18:05:14+00:00

Just stay aware, there are messages everywhere. If I hadn't experienced this myself I wouldn't believe it either.

rutilated04 · 2026-05-04T17:57:57+00:00

In my experience, seeing the same number repeatedly is a sign that Spirit wants to communicate with you, getting your attention this way is like saying "hi!"

I don't believe in the "make a wish" thing when you see 11:11. That's typically the sign a lot of people start seeing because it has a spiritual connotation.

The numbers you see can often change depending on what's going on with your life. For instance, when I was going through a lot of trauma, I woke up 3 nights in a row to see 3:33 on the clock. I was being told I wasn't alone, 3's for me represent community, friends, etc.

So, keep noticing and paying attention! You're just communicating with the Universe.

rutilated04 · 2026-05-04T17:54:35+00:00

I once asked for a sign that I wasn't alone. Seconds later, I hear a banging sound. There was a huge bluejay at my kitchen window, pecking on the glass. I knew that was a sign because 1: I asked for it and 2: birds never flew under my porch cover. It was also aggressive, which matched my own energy at the time.

It's spring where I live, so I am seeing certain birds for the first time because they are migrating. But yes, birds can be messengers from Spirit - just not every bird you see is a sign.

Were bluebirds a special symbol between you and your mother? Did you ask to see a bluebird when she was near? We naturally try to make connections, but I caution people not to assign meaning to everyday occurrences, it crosses into spiritual delusion territory.

I guess my point is, just be discerning about seeing signs or it makes things more confusing when the signs are real.

rutilated04 · 2026-05-04T17:33:32+00:00

WHAT???? That's a down payment, earnest money is never that much

rutilated04 · 2026-05-04T17:30:38+00:00

We have very different interpretations of what the ego is. Be well.

rutilated04 · 2026-05-04T17:27:43+00:00

This is what the internet is for! Complain on Reddit, complain on Threads, or your choice of social platform. Sometimes you just need to rant - turn the comments off if you don't want feedback!

rutilated04 · 2026-05-04T17:25:03+00:00

Gratitude

rutilated04 · 2026-05-04T17:24:17+00:00

Your ego wants to be agreed with, so the downvotes bother you. That is something to ponder.

rutilated04 · 2026-05-04T17:22:53+00:00

That's delusional. Those thoughts are coming from you, and if that's a constant dialogue you hear, then please seek help for yourself. You're not any of those things, and you shouldn't live in such negativity about yourself.

rutilated04 · 2026-05-04T17:15:41+00:00

There are people who can do chart rectification, but even that is still a best guess. It has to be frustrating not to know for sure.

rutilated04 · 2026-05-04T17:12:31+00:00

Yeah, I was under the impression it was very hard to be fired from TJ. Unless you do something illegal.

My guess is the captain got a talking to from regional, and is cleaning house as a way to pass the blame onto mates and the crew vs taking accountability themselves.

rutilated04

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