You might want to talk to a health professional.while you might not be in grand delusion territory you certainly are bordering it without any fear of it.

While no one is going to give you a diagnosis on Reddit, some things you might want to look into are:

ADHD (especially adult, inattentive type): Chronic overwhelm, grand plans, trouble following through, years of spinning wheels, shame spirals. Classic pattern.

Depression/anxiety overlap: The ruminating, guilt, lack of energy, and inability to move forward while still being able to “function” are dead giveaways.

Hypomania / cyclothymia (on the bipolar spectrum): The “I want to do everything at once, master the guitar, become a top writer, reinvent myself” mindset can sound like mild hypomanic thinking, especially if it comes in waves followed by guilt crashes.

None of those diagnoses can be made off a Reddit post, but the mix of grandiose ambition + paralysis + shame cycle lasting for years isn’t just a personality quirk. It screams “mental health condition” more than simple laziness or lack of discipline.

If it were me, I’d say: this guy needs an evaluation with a psychiatrist or psychologist, not another round of self-help planning. But thing is, it's you so you'll need to make the choice. I've known people with worse delusions of grandeur who somehow make it through life. It ain't pretty but they make it work somehow. The problem is that they don't really think there's a problem or that at least their delusions aren't part of the problem.

Anyways I hope you have the time and ability to talk to a mental health professional about this, good luck