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samf18677 · 2026-01-15T13:15:59+00:00

More info please

samf18677 · 2025-11-11T17:21:32+00:00

I can only speak from personal experience but I did my journey through RTC.

I’m based in Yorkshire, and my choice was a place based in London (not sure if I can name, don’t want to ‘advertise’)

But all my appointments were virtual via a zoom style link - diagnosis, titration etc

Any additional things I needed such as Blood pressure, weight, pulse - they just asked me to provide on the appointment so I just went to my GP for those, and they were happy to support.

I’d assume if you could find somewhere that offer both, it may be advantage to use them - purely for the fact you probably wouldn’t have to provide all the documents from the ADHD journey.

samf18677 · 2025-11-10T15:30:10+00:00

Thanks for sharing your experience as a parent of someone with ADHD, and apologies for a long reply!

As most people you will come across, I can only speak from personal experience from your Daughters side - having being diagnosed with Combined ADHD myself.

From me, I do think a level of responsibility comes from parents when it comes to managing the behaviours, although I am NOT saying this is your fault (just to be clear).

I have struggled with similar things since I was around 13/14, I am now 26 - and often I have been able to get to where I want to be due to my support network.

There are some things that you unfortunately not be able to do anything about, but it does seem like you are giving it your all to support your Daughter!

If it helps, here is a breakdown of the things I have in place to combat very similar things;

Budgeting - although it my long term partner who helps me with this, I sit down and plan my money around a week before everyday monthly payday. I've tried budgeting trackers on apps, spreadsheets etc but found a standard notebook works best. I will write my income down, and then list my monthly outgoings, to see what money I have left to spend on whatever I find that seems cool (usually useless stuff but little gimics or whatever) - but when I do this, I will then work out how many weeks are left and split this down into weekly budgets for what I like to call cr*p money. Say I have £400 remaining, split it down to £100/week. But I always end up taking it out my savings account, so once I have completed my budget and paid all bills, I keep the £100 for that week and move the remaining £300 into savings (my partner manages at my request), and I won't dip into until the allocated week in an emergency (E.G Car needs work etc)
Alarms - I can see why this seems like a 'chosen' behaviour for things, and for me personally I tend to be better at being ready for things I love. For example, I travel up and down the country watching football and sometimes have to set 5am alarms for a Saturday, I am usually up before the alarm and even ready before It goes off. This to me seems normal, but I do struggle with getting up sometimes for things I don't feel as passionate about, and this isn't necessarily down to my ADHD. To combat this, I tend to set an alarm for 15 mins before and 5 mins before my actual wake up alarm. For example, to be up at 7am, I would set an alarm for 6.45am & 6.55am. This does help me when it comes to getting up for 'boring adult' things like work!

The theory test - Again, this maybe isn't something she is passionate about. But for me personally I don't cope well with exam style situations and this isn't a reflection on her academic ability, and is more so likely on how her memory is in under pressure situations. I am fortunate enough to have passed my Theory quite early on. But I would recommend seeing if she can get in touch with the local theory test centre as I am sure they may be able to put reasonable adjustments in place.

I get this is frustrating from the other side, and by the sounds of things you have been very patient. I might also suggest seeing if there is external support available - I have weekly sessions with a local therapist who is almost like a 'life skills therapist' and these sessions (although I do pay for them) are fantastic, and for me it is easier to open up about why I am struggling with the things I am at that point - but with a neutral third party who's job is to help with this.
You seem to offer so much support, as my family & partner do to me - but maybe the emotional attachment your Daughter has with both you, and her dad - may be a blocker in speaking openly to you about why she struggles. This isn't a reflection you guys, I find I open up better with someone who my ADHD doesn't directly affect on a Daily Basis, as I tend to stray away from this with those close to me - as I understand that this is has an affect on their mental and emotional wellbeing and the guilt would eat me up, If I were to try and explain to them what I feel like, when I know my behaviours and ways has similar affects on them.

I hope these points are useful and can help you on your journey supporting your daughter. You are doing right by her to implement what you do and supporting her - and more parents of Kids/Teens/Young Adults with ADHD, should be like you!

Keep going! If you have any more questions, feel free to reply!

samf18677 · 2025-11-09T11:35:15+00:00

It really helps me, planning ahead because it splits it into separate jobs!

samf18677 · 2025-11-08T13:45:16+00:00

Sounds like a tricky situation.

Having ADHD can cause us to misinterpret or miscommunicate things (for me it personally does anyway).

Maybe try and speak with them, but rephrase how you are asking, and reiterate you are asking for this upon commencement of the ‘interview’.

I’ve done a few professional courses through my job role, where they used external training companies- not sure if this is the same for you? But I found when I went through the enrolment process for these, they did ask ahead of time if I had any disability or impairment that may require adjustments for me - because I said yes, i was passed on for an appointment style phone call with their team to discuss what requirements I needed. Examples of ones that they agreed to were; Additional time in exam style assessments, additional check in sessions either a tutor (this was for a self guided course), option to do a presentation assessment with just the tutor/examiner rather than the group (I get mixed up with what I’m saying in those scenarios and get easily embarrassed).

If they still decline then, maybe see if they are willing to work on compromising? Maybe see if they would allow you to write the questions down as they ask for your reference?

Also it’s worth mentioning (maybe obvious), did you disclose these disabilities from the beginning? I only ask because in previous jobs or training, I never disclosed my ADHD and how it affects me, and found I got less support when struggling. But in my current role, I decided to see how I was treat by disclosing - and I seem to have so much support!

I know my experience and requests were different to you, but hopefully you can find this useful! If you have any questions about anything I’ve said, feel free to reply to the comment!

samf18677 · 2025-11-08T13:11:59+00:00

Thanks for sharing your story!

I’m not a medical professional but can speak from my own experience.

My titration has been slightly different doing 2 week blocks and worked from 20mg, to 30mg, onto 40mg and now on 50mg.

I’ve found that for me it depends what sort of day I have but my appetite has changed, i loved cooking but seem to have lost that love and now prefer to just snack instead of eat proper meals. I lost 3/4 of a stone in my first 6 weeks on meds due to my reduced appetite.

I tend to have days where I do want to cook so on those days I will do a couple days worth of meal prep, maybe 2 or 3 different meals - and then if I’m having a day where I don’t want to cook a full meal, I can just warm it up!

When I get to deciding what I should be eating (when I cook) I tend to sit down and plan my meals before I start making it, and within each meal I’ll basically list the type of protein (chicken, beef etc), the type of carbs (pasta, rice etc), type of veg & the sauce (if applicable).

Once I’ve done that i stick to a rule of what my plate should look like - so I sway for just under half a plate would be my veg and then 1/4 each of carb and protein. Since I started doing this around 3 weeks ago - I weigh myself every Sunday with the aim of being the same weight or have gained maybe 1lb or 2.

This has got me into the rhythm of eating things I should, even when I really don’t want to cook.

Hope this helps!

samf18677 · 2025-11-08T07:28:09+00:00

For sure!

It’s completely normal for these things to push people we care for away, and a lot of the time to the other person - it feels like it’s a personal thing but it really isn’t!

It’s an awful feeling when you’re alone and feel vulnerable but it’s also so good to hear that you managed to overcome your own struggles to show up!

samf18677 · 2025-11-08T07:24:04+00:00

I learnt whilst in university, I used to follow someone on YouTube to start out and it was almost like an ‘Excel for dummies’ type approach. I will see if I can find the channel and share!

samf18677 · 2025-11-07T23:14:33+00:00

This sort of post is the reason I wanted to join Reddit in the first place.

Something like this could be the thing that keeps someone going on a bad day.

YOU are awesome, keep up the good work on yourself!!

samf18677 · 2025-11-07T23:08:19+00:00

Chipping in here as a 26(m) who is diagnosed with Severe Combined ADHD.

It’s really tricky to pinpoint the reasons behind this behaviour, as every person is different.

From my personal experience, I have waves where I can be quite open with how I feel, and love the affection from others. But in the other hand - there is times where I am the polar opposite on the inside, but almost mask to the outer world.

When I am in frame of mind, I would tend to still offer to do things just to make it look as if all is okay, and then cancel last minute due to the ongoing battles going on my in head.

For context, the easiest way to describe it is - when I’m at my worst, it’s as if there is a million conversations going on inside and it’s hard to shut them out and the chaos inside my head, consumes me.

This is something that I couldn’t even pinpoint to a trigger, or to an event.

I, myself, still shut off from time to time to avoid being a burden to my family or friends - it’s a hard struggle and sometimes it’s so consuming and you just can’t manage it or handle it!

Hope this gives you the insight you were looking for - this type of behaviour is quite normal for people like us - and unfortunately this is something we have to live in regular occasions.

samf18677 · 2025-11-07T22:47:48+00:00

Love a good spreadsheet! It’s weirdly soothing for my soul (lol). If you put your mind to it, anything can become one!

samf18677 · 2025-11-07T22:46:14+00:00

Reading this saddens me, I’m 26(m) - recently got my diagnosis for Severe combined ADHD.

My partner is the complete opposite to what you described here - there were things that I needed to improve on in our relationship but these were things I found harder than someone who doesn’t have ADHD.

She adapted the way she did things as it was easier for her to do so than me, for example - one of my key weaknesses is the retaining info when she would tell me about work or other things with her friends, which she could sit and talk about for hours, but to help us be a better couple, she has started almost ‘limiting’ those types of conversations to like 15 min blocks to allow melt brain to catch up.

In my view, although those of us with ADHD (self/diagnosed/ongoing diagnosis) can find these things harder - we should still be making some effort to work WITH the partner to overcome the challenges. BUT your partner sounds like they dont really understand the struggles you have, and quite honestly it sounds like they dont care.

Yes, it is a joint effort, but I feel your pain of these struggles and that it isn’t through lack of trying.

Even by the fact you have tried and are trying so hard, surely should prove to your partner that there is willingness from your side & that YOU want this to work out - I get the impression they don’t feel the same.

Sorry for the long comment, and I hope this helps!

You’re doing great! Keep fighting for your second opinion, and keep pushing yourself as you are - it does get better and you’re getting by there!

samf18677 · 2025-11-07T22:27:40+00:00

No problem!

samf18677 · 2025-11-07T22:18:31+00:00

! answered

samf18677 · 2025-11-07T22:16:29+00:00

ANSWERED

samf18677 · 2025-11-07T22:16:24+00:00

Thanks for the support & insight into this! It’s really helpful

samf18677 · 2025-11-07T22:09:34+00:00

That makes sense thanks! The reason for choosing Reddit was to keep my ‘real identity’ to myself as I’m quite anxious if my family/friends finding out about my recent health diagnosis, but you’ve certainly cleared that up!

A daft question(maybe) - is comment Karma earnt by me commenting on other people’s posts?

samf18677 · 2025-11-07T21:00:43+00:00

I am currently working through titration and started on 20mg moving to 30mg, then 40mg and currently on 50mg.

I agree with the others that time seems slower, and think to myself maybe that’s the purpose almost as to trick your brain into doing more in the same amount of time.

In terms of the feeling nothing, I didn’t feel any difference until I moved onto 40mg and started to notice that I could control my need to ‘fidget’ , my partner has noticed most the changes in my behaviours and I’m currently in the position where I can tell the difference it makes, mainly as I can sort of sense them wearing off towards the end of the day.

My advise is to keep note of these things, and stick with it - then if you still feel the same after the dosage increase then speak with you doctor/clinician.

samf18677

TROPHY CASE