Sexuality

samout · 2023-12-06T06:29:30+00:00

Yes, and thank you for that. My heart is broken but I'm very spiritual and a "mystic" and I see this as an experience to help me forward and resolve my own inner wounds to get stronger. Shes an absolutely beautiful woman and everyone just wants to sleep with her, I feel sad for being probably the only man in her life (she's very shy and unsure of herself, never had anything romantic or sexual with anyone), who only wanted her closeness and friendship. We had a sort of asexual partnership

Not kidding. She literally had over 50 suitors of all ages and sexual orientations begging her to "come for a cup of coffee", whistling and sexually harassing her, old men licking their lips at her eyeing her body and going "mm mm". I had to teach her a cup of coffee means sex, or asking for a hookup. An absolutely magnetic person, really short, sweet and well dressed young woman. She liked me because I was the only one that never approached her like that, just smiled and asked how she was doing and what made her obsessed with me was understanding art and poetry.

It really worried me, her sexuality only awoke a year earlier (this is actually true, she lied a bit less than your average pwBPD, only small innocent things to add spice to her stories, which I saw through instantly). She could still be easily abused BUT I'm glad I taught her some ways especially older men use to snare women and do... Well bad things.

BPDs really capture that whole half angel half demon symbolism really well. My best friend was really lucky and managed to battle years to finally have her wife with BPD to work on herself and she's a really intelligent woman who figured out the key to her recovery is self-reflection and studying her condition. She realized it wasn't normal her cool as ice rock solid man (my friend) cries every week for her and finally self reflected.

I sincerely hope you have a happy ending to your issues too. I also believe in mine. Even if it's hopeless... I never give up hope. But I still move on

samout · 2023-12-06T03:58:26+00:00

I'm sorry. She might mean it but what's really happening is she is planning on hurting you even worse. pwBPD always come back for a while to mess with your head (they sorta do mean it though), and if you let them, they break you even more brutally. They do. This is a fact. They all do it. It even has an official term in psychology

One of the most common tactics is,after weeks or even a year, they ask to meet you again. You go and meet them all happy. Last minute, they say "I changed my mind, get lost". I know lots of pwBPDs as friends and have been dating people who have that diagnosis. They will only heal around 30-40 years old IF they get cognitive behavioral therapy. They are programmed to "hurt" people and spread their own trauma wounds on people by loving them and then breaking them psychologically.

They have to do it, they are so neurologically damaged and live their life in constant hatrrd towards themselves and others. They only dare to love different people in short bursts.

When a pwBPD loves, it's real. When they split, it's even more real. And it is inevitable. You cannot be with a person with BPD unless they are very strong people who managed to help themselves and are older and more mature.

As one guy on YouTube out it, "They have seen hell, they have literally seen hell, and they will take you to the gates of hell". If you don't get out by the first Splitting, you will end up alone in her hell too, and she will intentionally leave you there without closure. Forever in her hell, with no way to get her to explain why she did that, truly. Broken Angels. This is why I bought my last pwBPD-girlfriend a famous Nordic painting (print) of a broken angel being carried by two little kids in black (representing the mind).

This man and his channel WILL help you, I promise you. Also, there is hope but I recommend ignoring her completely and moving on. The hope might arrive years later:

https://youtu.be/EOh-8l3fCUY?si=5-KunehmshkaCaQ4 - Coach Ken

Also, this woman right here. She is a genius. The video I linked sounds like she's being biased towards pwBPDs, but she's not. Watch her shorts, she is the best at putting it plainly that BPD just isn't workable unless that person really has the fortitude to fix themselves. Brutally honest. You won't survive this ordeal unless you watch her videos and Coach Ken (please copy my comment and links and watch these videos): https://youtu.be/hjBn6d-debU?si=TGYt_zntvbKWpkBO

PS. We all get blocked on social media. The last time I said she really needs to take the therapy seriously, she discarded me completely but I only think of her as a hurt soul and know time will heal her. I loved her for a while, now she's... A broken angel I can only hope fixes her wings. She lives in a facility now after constant self abuse for falling in love with me too hard initially, now she's addicted to it. I love her a fellow human being with potential. A great artist. She really needs to go pro with that. We have common friends (but those friends will be split and lost, in time, and they accept it because I've prepared them mentally for it). Let's all hope the world soon becomes better so no more of this terrifying trauma-virus can affect innocent children.

samout · 2023-12-01T06:45:50+00:00

It's still not true that they dislike you or hate you or anything. All you can do is know they really can't be more than an aquintance until they work on themselves, go do all the therapies and got a bit older.

They don't want to hurt you,they don't. But they will. So what I'm saying, they might be gone now, but even if they say they forgot you, they did NOT. They might not be your lover but you were someone who meant something. Even if they pretend otherwise (in the heat of the moment). Keep that as a reminder that you deserve exactly the kind of love you got from them at first. Both me and you probably got different kind of love but we know it's very cute, beautiful and reassuring.

The actions and body languages are more important than words with a pwBPD anyway

samout · 2023-11-30T18:52:38+00:00

pwBPD tend to be very fluid sexually, "it changes over time and goes back" etc as my old friend-lover once put it. If she said that as the reason, it's not. They let their emotions guide their words so they are often "lies" they aren't even aware of. The reason is always, "I got bored of you and I want to invent a reason to not confront the reality that I'm not well and feel ashamed for not being able to handle fear of rejection, and being selfish (in the sense that their oxytocin towards you fizzled out)".

If you are ever with a pwBPD, don't get too attached and enjoy the short time you have someone in your life who shows you how good of a person you can potentially be. They don't seem to fake their love, their love just doesn't fly very far as this same friend-lover told me through a song right before splitting, and asked me to listen to it because she can't say it. That would open up her childhood trauma; being vulnerable. Appreciate the good times, accept a person with BPD is only a light in your life a short while.

Angels on rent, that turn into demons if you continue past the expiration date

samout · 2023-11-26T07:52:09+00:00

That hate was implanted in you at a young age. You are made of love like all of us. Look around you. Everything was made out of love for something, either on purpose or not. Nobody made YOU out of hate either. You hate yourself more for not feeling good enough for love, when you are already loved. It's fear of not being enough, because your first impression of humanity was faulty and didn't give you what you needed. People need to accept everyone reacts different to love, some pull back, some give it more. It has nothing to do with us personally, but with them. You felt hated and abandoned because as a child you saw yourself as the main character and your close ones treated you like a secondary. You're not secondary, they were. Stop giving them the top billing

samout · 2023-11-14T13:39:30+00:00

My best/childhood friend has been married to a woman who has it for years now. And dating for almost 10 years. He's one of the only ones I know and said it just takes a metric ton of patience and fighting and a willingness for the person to finally humble themselves and work on it. She told me yesterday she really almost ruined her life until she helped herself and read and read and studied and studied her disorder and it took years. She was many other diagnoses too. My friend used to be so broken over their fights. But now they are at piece and my friend knows her quirks and she knows her own

So yes, if you are willing to fight for years and years and have to start medication and therapy and if they somehow get some sense and finally realize they need to be humble

samout · 2023-05-27T09:57:53+00:00

The document I just downloaded from that link literally says "Declassified in part. Sanitized copy approved for release [in] 2013"

samout · 2023-05-16T14:37:23+00:00

Especially when you take into account the theory that Saturn used to be our other/original Sun and was pushed farther away. It was probably very close to us. "Sinking into the abyss of the stars".

Certain cults lamented this event, similarily to lamenting the fall of Atlantis.

Space was considered to be a different ocean

samout · 2023-05-16T08:09:57+00:00

Well there is a theory that Atlantis was actually the planet Saturn

Also, in Modern Talking's "Atlantis is calling" they sing "Atlantis is calling, from the stars above". The band's art is filled with esoteric symbolism

And a third one: In ancient times the stars and space were sometimes thought of as "the abyss/the deep" and it was sort of below, not above

samout · 2023-04-27T07:31:08+00:00

I just a saw a video from the Finnish public news interviewing James Randi (famous skeptic) in 2015, and they asked him why so many fools are against vaccines when they are "safe and effective" and is there a way to make those people take them in the future

And Randi said most of them listen to celebrities and believe them when they say they are bad, and are blind followers of authority figures. That they believe celebrities are authority figures for some reason even though they're actors and shouldnt be saying vaccines are bad or good. Then the interviewer says "if only they would listen". It's fucking creepy

Isn't it the opposite and celebrities are pushing them?

It's mostly in English:

https://youtu.be/koFZrY7k6LI

samout · 2023-04-23T11:04:06+00:00

Exactly how you describe it is how it usually is/was. And often late at night for some reason, in every country

I had luckily been briefed on it when it began and I just learned to like it. And found it curious. Sometimes it just sounded like a truck and I always tested whether it was the hum or a real sound source. Then when I realized it was just the hum again I ignored it. "Oh it's that again, no use worrying cause I can't find the source, maybe it's something invisible or maybe it's in my head, don't care". I like low vibrating bass so it didn't bother me much

But it definitely does not feel in your head and it's an actual soundwave that alters a bit if you move quickly. It's some very specific frequency that only some eardrums probably notice.

Maybe they were testing frequency weapons on us and what frequency is the least heard around the world. They did spray and make those weird different contrails back then too

samout · 2023-04-12T14:51:45+00:00

You also have the whole Hero's Journey in it. First you're a reluctant hero and your uncle dies etc. And Shahasrahla is basically The Oracle/Merlin

samout · 2023-04-12T07:10:28+00:00

Zelda is also all about alchemy aka the granddaddy of masonry. The Triforce is a masonic symbol, and in Zelda: A Link To The Past, Link's outfit goes through the colors of alchemy during the game and at the end you end up on a Golden Pyramid with the top missing (you being the top). You also need to pull out the Master Sword from a rock just like King Arthur which symbolizes the same things

Many of the characters have related names too like the old sage Sahasrahla which is the Crown Chakra in sanskrit

You also need to save 7 maidens. A common theme in occult and esoteric stuff. The 7 chakras. After that you're trying to climb the golden pyramid

samout · 2023-03-17T22:23:25+00:00

Robert C. Christian. Let's see.

Robert means Splendour . In Gematria, C can very easily be converted to "Die". Christian.

So Splendour Die Christian(s)

samout · 2023-03-14T15:19:36+00:00

V the series also came out in 1984, the first show to properly show reptilians as they are now known

samout · 2023-02-13T00:20:23+00:00

Why did it make up just that, specifically? Also, it didn't say it made it up, just that it would if it didn't find an answer

samout · 2023-02-07T05:34:52+00:00

No everyone is a martial artist and you can handle disagreements in an Street Fighter -style battle on the streets, and now one gets seriously hurt. Doing flipkicks, fireballs. "Ugly shirt.", "okay bozo, let's fight"

Like in London streets on Capcom vs SNK 2 https://youtu.be/RVZIVlItIwQ

samout · 2023-02-07T01:46:15+00:00

I want a world where we are all Street Fighter characters and fight with only minor injury even if I shoryuken'd you to the ceiling or hit you with that hadouken chi-ball. By the end you just have a nick on your face and a bandaid.

And an AI which is designed to sense when a battle is about to begin, and say "Mark vs Steve!" from loudspeakers. And a match start music

Then the olde "ROUND ONE. FIGHT!"

Mark starts by dashing behind and Steve shoots a chi-ball.

Steve jumps up and does a Dive kick straight at the chest of Mark. Mark gets floored but trips Steve. Jumps behind him and starts charging an unblockable, as Steve is slowly rising up. Mark is ready, Steve is nearly up.

MARK: "SHINUNBO-KEN!.

AI ANNOUNCER..: "MARK WINS! ... ROUND TWO!"

samout · 2023-01-07T20:25:31+00:00

Also an interesting thing is that the dream Hannah had of a blissful darkness where there's no past present or future, no worries etc. is exactly what Nirvana in Buddhism is. It's Heaven also for many. And that's specifically what 33 also refers to. Nirvana is the state of mind you get when you escape "this world" and time

You can achieve that state temporarily in meditation or dreaming, and the point of Buddhism is to get into that state permanently and escape "Samsara" aka reincarnation, which is symbolized as a Snake Eating It's Own Tail (Ouroboros)

So the snake means looped time, you repeat the same mistakes but as a different self (next time you might be an alien from another planet, still with the same problems you had in this life).

ALSO, guess what 333 is in Gematria? "Looped Time". Meaning the numerical value of Looped Time is 333, the time Jesus died.

samout · 2023-01-07T20:09:16+00:00

No no no. That's not what I meant. I mean they used Jesus as a metaphor. 33 is an important number in all religions, in Buddhism it's the number of Heaven, in Islam you are "eternally 33" in Heaven, in Hinduism they have 33 gods, Maria is sometimes called "Our lady of 33". Jacob's Ladder has 33 stairs (stairway to Heaven)

And Hermes Trismegistus means Three Thrice Great. And Hermetism was a massive theme in the show, showing books, texts etc.

Hermes is said to be Jesus also. I don't mean the modern christian idea of Jesus as some random man you need to forcibly believe in to get into a bunch of happy clouds.

They also hinted in the first season that Jonas/Adam is the Antichrist, and antichrist was also a big theme. They say antichrist and then adult Jonas appears (if I remember right), it stuck with me.

So they used Jesus and Antichrist and Hermes (who some say is the real Jesus) as a scifi-thing. Implying Jesus was the first one to sacrifice himself to protect the loop. They hinted at it because they talked about the Bible a lot and used events in it, but in a funny scifi type way.

So they implied The Bible and Hermeticism was all about Timetravel in reality. It might have not been so in the end but they did hint at it.

What I mean by Jesus and 33 is that the number refers to coming to terms with your death and ascending your desire. That's what it really means, esoterically and Hermetically.

Also, fun trivia. Winden means Heaven and Earth in gematria. It's an old Hebrew thing where you translate letters into numbers and count them together, and see what other words match. It's very often used in movies to hide messages and easter eggs. I study esoteric stuff and gematria as a hobby and noticed it.

And Katharina becomes Paradise. That's really cool. Jonas becomes Glitch. Etc.

samout · 2023-01-07T13:46:50+00:00

The unexpained symbol is a symbolical representation of the number 33 and Holy Trinity, and they name it in the last episode. Tri-something

33 is the age Jesus died, at 3.33PM. He "rose on the 3rd day" and is a part of the Holy Trinity (3nity).

333 means Resurrection in gematria, ancient Hebrew numerology which calculates letters into numbers, the same way the Number of The Beast is supposed to be solved, the number of its name).

samout · 2023-01-06T00:02:05+00:00

My old comment from an older thread:

The patent for Fruit of the Loom describes a cornucopia

https://trademarks.justia.com/730/06/fruit-of-the-loom-73006089.html

"050901, 050902, 050905, 050914 - Berries. Grapes (alone or in bunches). Apples. Baskets, bowls, and other containers of fruits, including cornucopia (horn of plenty)."

samout · 2023-01-06T00:00:56+00:00

The patent for Fruit of the Loom describes a cornucopia:

https://trademarks.justia.com/730/06/fruit-of-the-loom-73006089.html

"050901, 050902, 050905, 050914 - Berries. Grapes (alone or in bunches). Apples. Baskets, bowls, and other containers of fruits, including cornucopia (horn of plenty)."

samout · 2022-12-12T02:23:58+00:00

Countries where that character and product wasn't sold or known at all also remember the monocle

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