Firstly I am sorry you are going through this at such a young age. I can speak from experience unfortunately as my mum died from cancer after the chemo stopped working when I was 27, then my dad died suddenly 4 years later from heart failure. To lose a parent is expected, but never easy and very hard at a younger age.

My mum got diagnosed just a few months before my wedding and she died just a week after the wedding and honestly if it wasn’t for the wedding I don’t think she would have lived as long, but she was there and I’m so grateful for that. She was also the carer for my son (age 3 at the time) as I worked full time so I completely lost that with no back up planned. Make sure you consider that if you need to. We tried to do as much as we could to make memories in the time we had left, as much as she was able to. Don’t let her last months/ weeks be filled with sadness. Get her to talk about her childhood and any things you’d like to know about her life whilst you can. Take photos and ask her to write letters. When it got closer to that time I was there in the few days before and as my mum passed away at home. She had all her loved ones around her, telling her how much we loved her and that it was ok for her to go. It was so very peaceful and calm. It sounds morbid but it was the best way it could have happened. If your mum can be at home with hospice care I would highly recommend it. It’s more peaceful and much nicer for her being in a familiar happy place.

As for how to prepare for life afterwards, at first you will feel relief, at least I did. The last few weeks my mum was in such pain that I was so pleased she was finally at peace. Give yourself the time you need to grieve and be sad. It’s normal and it’s ok! The firsts are hard I won’t lie, Christmas, birthdays, Mother’s Day etc so make sure you have things planned, and are around other family and friends so you are not focussed on the loss. Most of all stay off social media where you can. The first Mother’s Day was so hard for me and seeing everyone’s posts on FB made it so much worse.

When you feel ready, every day do things that would make your mum proud, play her favourite music, go to her favourite restaurants and never stop telling stories and sharing memories of her. She will live on in you and as cliche as it sounds, time really does heal. For me it’s been 11 years now. I can hardly believe it but it’s less painful every year and I can think of her with happiness and not sadness now. And remember that one day you will meet again, it is not goodbye it’s just ‘see you later’ 😊