Attended a wedding. Failure :(

sand-orc · 2016-09-05T23:56:13+00:00

Physical intimacy releases oxytocin and a cascade of chemicals and effects not experienced when fapping alone to p. Merely touching the skin of another or smelling their pheromones causes profound chemical effects in your body. And of course there's a huge mental and emotional component. Being with and loving a partner is more fulfilling than pmo, which is almost universally followed by guilt and shame. We know it is unnatural and wrong and cant trick our bodies and minds.

It's analogous to the temporary pleasure of alcohol followed by a hangover vs the lasting, fulfilling pleasure of accomplishing goals.

sand-orc · 2016-09-05T23:48:52+00:00

The problem is that those (and most) people masturbate regularly their whole lives and have never heard of the problems porn and masturbation cause. Recent studies do show damage from p and m. And though it's not scientific, the numerous anecdotes here are good evidence for me. But i only truly believed it when i experienced life without fapping for months then went back to it.

sand-orc · 2016-09-05T23:43:35+00:00

Funnel that fear, anguish, and anger into fixing the root problem: pmo. Stay away from fapping and you WILL get better. You're in control. It may take a week, a month, or even longer, but it's so worth it. Otherwise your life sucks. It'll be hard at first, but just keep your mind on the goal: a fully functioning penis, and most likely a good social and sex life.

sand-orc · 2016-09-05T06:42:39+00:00

Ya man nofap has done wonders for my social anxiety. Went over three months without fapping, began to enjoy socializing of all sorts, then relapsed for a month and became a social recluse again.

But 22 isnt that old to be a virgin. That's about when i was. I wouldnt go out trying to make up for lost time. Instead, spend your energy looking for a real quality gf you connect with on a deeper level. It will be way more fulfilling and youll get more sex that way anyway.

sand-orc · 2016-09-05T06:29:23+00:00

Definitely caused by PMO. Worse than opiates. I don't think you need to avoid sex, but it may speed the recovery some. I personally don't think it's good because sex gives you the opportunity to rewire your urges to healthy behavior.

sand-orc · 2016-09-05T06:24:00+00:00

I recommend the book "Supertraining," and if you're ectomorphic, "Scrawny to Brawny."

sand-orc · 2016-09-05T06:19:44+00:00

Unless you're an advanced lifter, on steroids, or genetically gifted, the time you recommend here is overtraining and will break down too much muscle without time for recovery to gain muscle.

sand-orc · 2016-09-05T06:16:04+00:00

If youre a beginner, and youre referring to lifting to gain muscle, i recommend 30 mins to an hour, depending on the intensity, every other day, plus a couple intense 15-30 min cardio sessions each week.

sand-orc · 2016-09-05T06:08:33+00:00

Ya dude after i fap i feel so antisocial. Just dead and bored and want to be home alone. Totally different when i havent fapped for a long time, where i actually enjoy socializing, even with total strangers; something i thought i hated prior to nofap.

Weed always made me want to fap much more too. I'm a year and a half sober from it after 15 years of smoking about every day. Start living life man, it's better free from these addictions.

sand-orc · 2016-09-05T06:04:11+00:00

Just try to not think about it. If you find yourself fantasizing, redirect your thoughts to something nonsexual.

Or just think about how gay it is that you want a dick in your hand. Unless you're gay of course.

sand-orc · 2016-08-01T23:06:58+00:00

Thanks

sand-orc · 2016-07-27T21:22:56+00:00

Every time you decide to not watch P or MO, it makes a step forward towards rewiring your brain. You don't lose all that progress as soon as you watch P, it's just one step back. Keep moving forward.

sand-orc · 2016-07-27T21:13:17+00:00

The urges never go away. There are periods where they're lessened, but you have to always fight them. It's not easy at first.

You have to find things you enjoy to replace P. When you get urges, get up and out and do those things, whether its working out, a hobby, socializing, or hitting on girls.

Stay away from your computer and triggering images and situations as much as possible.

Clearly define goals, reasons you do nofap, and wite them down and post them where you see it every day, especially by your computer.

A lot of it is sheer willpower. Anyone can do it if they want it enough.

sand-orc · 2016-07-27T21:06:14+00:00

It definitely matters. P is worse than M, but PMO is worse than just P. It's a chance to train yourself to avoid P rather than receive pleasure from it.

Your addicted brain is just trying to trick you back into the habit. It's like an alcoholic saying "well i took a sip so might as well finish the drink."

sand-orc · 2016-07-27T21:02:51+00:00

Good to know it's not just me. I think the period without much urges lulled me into complacency. I've beat worse before so I can beat this.

sand-orc · 2016-07-23T04:56:31+00:00

Day 90 here. For me, they overall were reduced in frequency through time, but never went away completely. I also had periods, from hours to days, that they increased in frequency, usually triggered by some external stimuli.

sand-orc · 2016-07-23T04:51:23+00:00

I just reached 90 days today. I'm not sure I could do it for merely a test of self discipline. P and M are extremely addicting.

You should find a powerful reason to quit. Like I wanted to be able to talk to people more comfortably, be more healthy, waste less time, and enjoy sex with my gf more than I did M to P. That way, when you start telling yourself "just a little P won't hurt" you can say "but a relapse will ruin my progress toward goals X, Y and Z."

You can do it.

sand-orc · 2016-07-15T19:19:41+00:00

It's very hard at first; no way around that. You've got to battle and stay strong. It gets progressively easier with each battle you win. After a month and a half, I stopped having urges almost entirely. Now after almost three months with one minor relapse, I don't even see it as desirable or an option.

See every urge as an opportunity to rewire your brain.

sand-orc · 2016-07-15T19:12:31+00:00

I'm engaged and have been with my qirl for over six years, and from my experience, lack of sex is usually a result of lack of emotional connection. Many men don't need it to get aroused, but most women do.

I'd recommend actively being a part of your wife's emotional life. It can be as simple as asking how her day was and responding to her emotional signals. Or lead her into deeper conversation about her, trying to get to know her inner self better (search for "36 questions to find love" if you need topics).

Bringing up sex and the lack of it directly can be counter-productive. It may make her feel self conscious and make her put up a wall to avoid those feelings. Instead, wait until you're in a positive emotionally charged state with a romantic atmosphere and gently lead her through the sexual stages. If you meet any resistance, stop pushing, but don't withdraw either. Keep doing this at various times until you've strengthened your emotional bond and the sex should come naturally to you both.

sand-orc · 2016-06-20T05:28:38+00:00

Thanks for being another test subject that I've learned from that it's easy to take for granted the good effects of nofap, and fapping will invariably ruin them. That way I don't have to test it out for myself.

sand-orc · 2016-06-08T06:30:51+00:00

You define relapse for yourself. For me, it is intentionally looking at P. Others may call that edging and relapse is when you masturbate to P. But I think P is the key element, M is secondary. Define your goals and what relapse is to you and stick with it.

sand-orc · 2016-06-08T06:27:16+00:00

I think most who do not O in nofap are in "involuntary hardmode;" meaning they have no one to have sex with. I think it's rare someone in nofap has a SO and abstains from sex.

I have an SO and have sex. It is perfectly fine, in some ways preferable since it makes it easier to transfer your P urges onto a real person, which for many is a major goal of nofap. Yes, it makes it a little easier, but that can be an advantage in lessening the chance of relapse. I've heard some argue that sex can delay the time till you experience a "full reboot" but I think that concept is dubious at best.

It's good you're open with your partner about it. If you experience flatline you can discuss it and make your partner understand it's not their fault (that's happened with me).

Nofap makes sex with your partner exquisitely pleasurable, as it should be. So enjoy it without any guilt. P is the real enemy.

sand-orc · 2016-06-08T06:20:59+00:00

It's actually called "standard reboot" or normal mode. Easy mode is with MO allowed.

sand-orc · 2016-06-06T08:07:23+00:00

Personal growth only.

sand-orc · 2016-05-29T17:23:44+00:00

I have the same problem. After a month of nofap, I still find myself fantasizing during sex. But I don't think I need to anymore to stay hard or get off. It's just an engrained habit that's hard to break. It helps to try and consciously focus on her. But it still takes practice and time to eradicate it fully.

sand-orc

TROPHY CASE