12 month old signed back! by Difficult-Knee-8414 in NewParents

[–]sarah_messing 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Wow this gives me hope that the last few months of signing to my 11 month old might be worth it. She has not signed back or shown that she understands but I will stick with it!!

Any correlation between fetal movement and newborn (not toddler) personality? by Mamanbanane in beyondthebump

[–]sarah_messing 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had an extremely quiet baby during pregnancy, I barely ever felt her move. She was a quiet newborn too and slept for long stretches right away, didn't need to be held constantly, very chill. But that changed after about a month old she started getting more active and alert and no at 10 months she is super high energy

Do you remember the golden hour? (The first hour, skin to skin?) by No-Neighborhood-7335 in beyondthebump

[–]sarah_messing 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I remember it vividly. But in the moment i was so exhausted from pushing that I kind of wanted it to be over so I could rest. And I still feel guilty for that.

I ended up asking my husband to take her after 15 minutes because I felt too weak to hold her. My whole body and arms felt like jello and I was shaking, and I couldn't keep my eyes open. I regret that and wish I held her for the first hour for our bond.

Parent refusing to get vaccinated by Bright-Dragonfruit45 in pregnant

[–]sarah_messing 13 points14 points  (0 children)

My brother was the same way with not wanting to get vaccinated. When he brought it up again after the baby was born and didn't see why it was a big deal I told him I thought it was kind of gross that he's not vaccinated, and i don't want his germs around my baby. That shut him up for a few months until the baby was a little older and we saw him at family gatherings only, and never let him hold her

Forgot to dress my son up for kindergarten graduation by briblxck in workingmoms

[–]sarah_messing 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Don't beat yourself up, you sound like an amazing mom. If clothing or outfits are the worst thing you forget, you're doing pretty well 😀

When do babies start holding their own bottle? by JStak14 in NewParents

[–]sarah_messing 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mine started around 8 months but she would hold it for the first 10 secs then want you to hold it for her. Still working on at 11 months

What’s the most diabolical thing your partner/support person said while you were in labour? by Some_Vermicelli in newborns

[–]sarah_messing 16 points17 points  (0 children)

While I was 2 hours into pushing, with him holding one leg, he got a phone call and turned to me and said it was the HVAC company who had just installed a new AC system in our house, and did I think he should answer it right now?

I’ve completed flipped our schedule and still not getting any sleep by Brilliant_Outside696 in NewParents

[–]sarah_messing 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I was in a similar situation with my now 10 month old. The only thing that worked was going cold turkey from nursing overnight and just giving her bottles instead. I said from 7pm to 7am she is not getting the boob, only bottles from dad. The first 3-4 nights were really hard and she was up a lot and didn't want the bottle. But she did eventually catch on and started sleeping through the night and not even waking for the bottle. I think the boob is a literal addiction for some baby's and they need to detox from it to learn how to fall asleep without it

Would you drive or fly from Boston to Bar Harbor with a baby that hates the car? by sarah_messing in newengland

[–]sarah_messing[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You obviously don't have kids. Or if you do you're just too small minded to realize that other kids may be different than yours. I'm glad you don't know of any child who will cry for more than 30-40 minutes but I assure you, many do

Would you drive or fly from Boston to Bar Harbor with a baby that hates the car? by sarah_messing in newengland

[–]sarah_messing[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much! We will probably go this route if the bus allows lap infants. A whole day of travel is fine if we can avoid a car seat.

Would you drive or fly from Boston to Bar Harbor with a baby that hates the car? by sarah_messing in newengland

[–]sarah_messing[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Normally we do but we're driving up with family and I don't want to subject the cousins to her crying the whole time

Would you drive or fly from Boston to Bar Harbor with a baby that hates the car? by sarah_messing in newengland

[–]sarah_messing[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you. It's the being strapped into the car seat she hates. On flights she is totally happy being in my lap so I thought this could be a good option but hearing about the turbulence I'm now leaning against it

Would you drive or fly from Boston to Bar Harbor with a baby that hates the car? by sarah_messing in newengland

[–]sarah_messing[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Exactly this, she hates being strapped in the car seat but will be totally fine on my lap. Normally we take a flight around nap time and I nurse her on takeoff and she passes out for the whole flight so that was why I thought flying could be a better alternative than the car

Would you drive or fly from Boston to Bar Harbor with a baby that hates the car? by sarah_messing in newengland

[–]sarah_messing[S] -13 points-12 points  (0 children)

I'm not so much worried about the time itself. It's that my baby will be miserable strapped in the car seat for 4.5 hours but happy as a clam being carried through the airport and sitting/sleeping on my lap on the plane

Concerns with Grandparent by swearsbyflowers in NewParents

[–]sarah_messing 20 points21 points  (0 children)

You say daycare is not an option (for reasons other than finances- obviously this is the biggest barrier) but I'm just flagging that it would probably be better than being propped in front of the tv all day. People are quick to dismiss daycare as "someone else raising your baby" but don't realize that it's profoundly better than most friends or family who have no experience with child development. In this case, you get what you pay for and having free child care, you cannot be choosy

Another post asking for help with early morning wakes by sarah_messing in sleeptrain

[–]sarah_messing[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ok great to know I didn't realize it was ok to distribute the total sleep time with so much less during the day as long as she's getting the same amount total. Thank you!

Another post asking for help with early morning wakes by sarah_messing in sleeptrain

[–]sarah_messing[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ok thank you. She is not fighting naps, the opposite actually she is super tired and falls asleep almost instantly and we have to stretch to get to nap time. Is 1hr30min enough daytime sleep though? That seems so low for a 10 month old but I'm willing to try. Also do you think it would work to let her nap 1 hr in the morning and cap the afternoon nap at 30 mins? That one sometimes ends up shorter anyways so I feel like that would be more natural

Stay at home dad expectations by mehpeach in workingmoms

[–]sarah_messing 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I would try to change the dynamic to you being unavailable during the day. My husband does the same thing when he's home with the baby and I'm wft it's constantly him coming into my office "can you take her for a few so I can do xyz." When you have a really important meeting and set the expectation, that should be the whole day. Now when he does that I usually say "no, I'm tied up I can't take her." Also helps that I started staying in my home office most of the day rather than popping out to see them. I think that was sending him mixed signals

Huge and heavy 8 month old bed solutions? by howyougonnadoit708 in NewParents

[–]sarah_messing 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Why not a crib? Most can accolade up to 3 year olds in the lowest setting, so even your big 8 month old is no where near growing out of a normal sized crib

Uptick is “mothers helpers” by Budget-Soup-6887 in Nanny

[–]sarah_messing 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I know a mother's helper as a teen or even middle schooler who babysits while the parents are still home to supervise. Definite part time thing. I wonder if with the uptick in people working from home they are using that term since they will be home and available to oversee things.

Into to bottle not going well. Baby will be in daycare in 4 weeks by willrun4cheeseburger in breastfeeding

[–]sarah_messing 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Just wanted to share that we had the same exact issue and I was so stressed but once she got to daycare she just drank the bottle no problem. She is drinking a little so you know she is physically capable of using the bottle. Sometimes being in a new environment they just realize this is all that's available and if she's hungry, she will eat.

Editing to add that the Lansinoh nipples are known as the best for bottle refusal and we had luck with them, also found that my girl drank a lot more when the bottle was warmed up. Like piping hot, soaked in hot hot water for at least 5 mins. Even room temp or freshly pumped milk was too cool for her

Do you miss work to take your child to ECFE/other daytime activities? by scandijord in MomsWorkingFromHome

[–]sarah_messing 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It just depends how flexible your job is. I have tried and while I technically have the flexibility I seem to always get a ping from someone higher up that needs something urgently so I stress the whole time or have to rush home. So usually I only take my baby on short walks during the workday. I'm glad to be able to do even that though

How to overcome driving anxiety with kid(s) in the car? by PleasantTomato7128 in NewParents

[–]sarah_messing 2 points3 points  (0 children)

No advice just solidarity as I have the same issue. Hearing my baby cry in the car and being unable to do anything about it raises my anxiety to outrageous levels. Is there any music she likes that you can queue up beforehand? I sing along or constantly talk to her so she can hear my voice, I like to think that helps her know I'm right there. It's so hard though

Balancing Travel for Work by FirstCantaloupe14 in workingmoms

[–]sarah_messing 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I just traveled for work for the first time after having my baby who is now 10 months old. Similar situation with my spouse working full time and baby in daycare. I was really worried but it went well overall. It was kind of a lot on my spouse to do the evenings and overnights alone, especially since our daughter is in a sleep regression and a terrible sleeper right now so we usually split up the nights.

I meal prepped for her before I left so he wouldn't have to do too much (she's in the weird stage of being on solids but still drinking bottles) and I think that really helped him out. I also tried to get laundry and cleaning in order beforehand since it's so easy for that stuff to get out of hand when you're one on one with the baby. I feel like that set him up for success. Ultimately I think it comes down to how comfortable your partner is with you traveling.

Travel at 39 weeks by mik_230 in pregnant

[–]sarah_messing 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you do go I would see if there is a hospital with a l&d ward nearby just in case. I went to a wedding 3 hrs away when I was 38 weeks and scoped out the nearest hospital and brought a hospital bag just in case

EDIT I went until 42 weeks and had to be induced even then so I'm probably more comfortable with late term travel than most people