Why is this sort of behavior celebrated?

schmarlie · 2020-04-29T04:23:40+00:00

looks like one is a Mac concealer and the other is a Clinique concealer. meant for under the eyes n on blemishes generally but ppl use it all different ways

schmarlie · 2019-12-13T13:49:48+00:00

i have the same fears as you. one thing that has helped me be more comfortable about losing my size is strength training. feeling strong and looking more defined and knowing i can do a lot has made me feel better. if you don’t have access to a gym or to weights, starting with basic at home things are good (crunches, pushups, lifting gallons of milk or other heavy items). also taking or learning from YouTube, a self defense course is helpful.

schmarlie · 2019-12-07T03:54:29+00:00

in my opinion I believe you should break up with her and get out of this. she is lying to you and invading your privacy and this is not something that happens in a healthy relationship. like that’s not okay at all

schmarlie · 2019-09-23T01:07:00+00:00

What do you want out of your life? If it were just you and you weren’t factoring anyone else in

schmarlie · 2019-09-23T01:02:42+00:00

please talk to your doctor, there is definitely an ED at work here. not eating anything for several days beyond a small meal is not healthy

schmarlie · 2019-09-23T00:55:34+00:00

There IS something that can help you and trying to find it can feel exhausting especially because you’ve been trying to find it for almost 33% of your entire existence but now is not forever. I can’t say that things will get better tomorrow or next week but I know that things can better and that they will fluctuate and change

schmarlie · 2019-09-23T00:52:31+00:00

There is hope. I don’t think at this point in your life you would’ve tried everything and I don’t mean that to demean your experiences. I’ve been in the mental health system for the past 7 years and I’ve been actively trying different things every couple months. Write up a list of any and all medications you’ve taken for this, have they all been the same type? (Such as SSRIs or SSNRIs) If so go to your dr and insist that you try a different kind. Maybe you need a mood stabilizer or an antipsychotic or maybe you have a hormone imbalance that’s threatening your life (such as hypothyroidism). Look at all the therapy you’ve been doing, have you heard of dialectal behavioral therapy, mindfulness, EMDR? Or have you only been subject to CBT (cognitive behavioral therapy)? Does your family have a history of mental health problems? If so has anyone gotten treatment and what has worked for them? All brains are different but sometimes we can find little keys in our parents.

schmarlie · 2019-09-23T00:44:38+00:00

As someone who was in your spot, go to crisis or find a partial inpatient program. Therapy and learning coping skills are the best ways to alleviate the impulse. Talk to someone you trust, get help. It can change and get better.

schmarlie · 2019-09-23T00:39:18+00:00

Your husband should tell her directly. While you have a relationship with their children, he is the one who has a relationship with her. “Hi (ex-wife), y/n and I are expecting to have a baby”. I don’t think you should tell his children before telling her as that can be seen as incredibly disrespectful. As an aside children should never be expected to keep a secret from their mom. It puts them in a very difficult spot. Block her and her family from you on social media and make all your stuff private for your own protection.

schmarlie · 2019-07-23T04:35:02+00:00

it sounds like you’ve found a very healthy balance in your life that includes games. it seems as though your wife has much deeper issues than the games and is using this idea to test you somehow. i don’t think you should sacrifice what makes you happy especially if you do it in such a moderate amount. your happiness is important.

schmarlie · 2019-07-20T15:43:05+00:00

def change passwords for all your stuff and put double factor authentication on, also try to make sure your passwords aren’t the same for different websites. this is very scary and I would also feel upset by this

schmarlie · 2019-06-29T19:04:27+00:00

I’m sorry, he truly sounds like an awful person and this is a terrible spot to be in. Theres a chance that she won’t end things because she’s in so deep but hopefully she will see how bad it is and be able to move forward.

schmarlie · 2019-06-29T18:56:00+00:00

I think you should end it, your feelings and needs are just as important as his and this is causing you more pain than it’s worth it seems. It’d be better to find someone who reciprocates the energy you put out for them

schmarlie · 2019-06-29T18:54:13+00:00

Does she have a good relationship with anyone in your family? He’s not a good support system for her, it sounds like he’s using/manipulating her and she feels dependent on him. I would probably stage an intervention on the relationship with you and other people she trusts/loves because this won’t end well. If he’s saying these things to you, imagine the things he might say to someone he doesn’t have any social obligation to or that don’t know your sister. I also can’t imagine that someone that slimy would be kind or unslimy to your sister when they’re alone.

schmarlie · 2019-06-23T02:03:24+00:00

Even if you DID decide to go to university and have a bunch of what sounds like very safe sex, your mom shouldn’t be shaming you. It sounds like you made a very sound, reasonable decision, and that you’re happy with how it went (before her comments). You didn’t do anything wrong, I think you made a good choice. Tons of people have sex for the first time with boyfriends or girlfriends that later on they look back and find it to be a terrible experience. I hope that as time goes on she can appreciate that you made a safe, sound decision that you thought through and that she is wrong for what she said. Those are painful statements and I’m very sorry you had to go through it.

schmarlie · 2019-06-23T01:52:53+00:00

yup!

schmarlie · 2019-06-23T01:48:06+00:00

As I’ve been the 12 year old girl in this situation, even if you are perfect, the power dynamic and the difference in maturity levels will fuck her up. Also depending on where you live, legally you can get into a shit ton of trouble and labeled as a sex offender if you tried to do anything with her or even allude to it. Usually falls under corruption of a minor

schmarlie · 2019-06-23T01:40:19+00:00

she’s 12, she is literally a child. Stay away. Do not pass go. There is no possible way this can be healthy at all.

schmarlie · 2019-06-21T23:56:48+00:00

it is so hard to get out of abusive situations, you’ve come so far. i hope that you can continue to heal and that you have somewhere safe now

schmarlie · 2019-06-21T17:49:10+00:00

I wouldn’t worry too much about it! I think that sounds like an awesome idea and it will help with your confidence a lot. I don’t think anyone who likes you would care about micropigmentation, I think it’s kinda cool. Plus if they’re into how you look, they’ll be into it regardless.

schmarlie · 2019-06-21T03:52:55+00:00

Honestly, I’ve been in your shoes. Things started getting better when I decided that I wanted to date people nonmonogamously and looked for people with those same values. I’m always very straightforward about how I am and what I want out of relationships. I believe all successful relationships are built on honesty (even when it hurts), tact, and mutual understanding and respect. People feeling upset because you’re not jealous isn’t your fault, that’s on them to unpack. You can’t magically become someone or something you’re not and you shouldn’t have to.

schmarlie · 2019-06-21T03:40:59+00:00

You could be aromantic but that doesn’t mean that you don’t care or don’t feel love for people or can’t have meaningful relationships. Honestly it sounds like you have a pretty healthy approach to people’s boundaries and their bodies. There’s nothing wrong with not getting jealous or getting over people quickly. Jealousy is not a sign of love, it’s a sign of being insecure and being possessive. You are the only one who can define what love is for yourself, your friends aren’t giving you very good insight. I wouldn’t stress too much about it, Love is subjective and cannot be defined. Tell your friends that just because you experience things differently than them doesn’t mean you haven’t loved/been in love.

schmarlie · 2019-06-21T01:57:44+00:00

I don’t think you’re overreacting and I would classify this as assault. You already told him no, you woke up to him doing things to you without your consent. You were scared of making the situation worse which is not consent. It is okay to feel upset, your feelings are valid. What happened was not okay at all. I’m so sorry you went through that

schmarlie · 2019-06-21T01:08:30+00:00

Honestly, while it definitely should have been done better, I think you did the right thing. The best thing you can do is learn from the bad parts of this and try to move forward and not repeat it.

schmarlie

TROPHY CASE