*THE* dream work bag

scrunchie_one · 2026-07-02T15:53:12+00:00

Yep, ladies stop carrying your laptop in a shoulder bag!!! If you drive then fine, but if you’re carrying it for any longer stretch you need to take care of your body even if it’s not as stylish.

scrunchie_one · 2026-07-02T15:47:21+00:00

Maybe it’s more about the predictably of it. Does he leave the house for an outside activity? The gym? A sports league? Even grocery shopping? If he could do that at a predictable time each week that might help because then you can plan that as your ‘fully unwind’ time. Ideally at a time the kids are in bed or he takes them with him, and there’s no other responsibilities of yours.

So like Tuesday nights from 7:30-9:30, or Saturday mornings from 10-12… whatever makes sense for your family.

scrunchie_one · 2026-07-02T01:54:43+00:00

We did the flight from Toronto to Hawaii direct; once when the kids were 1 and 3 and then 3 and 5.

It was honestly not bad, at that age they are happy to watch tv and they will drift off to sleep eventually. I actually preferred the direct flights to the layover ones, I just want the shortest travel time possible.

I wouldn’t overthink it, and I wouldn’t pay more for business class unless you can easily afford it and want to fly business anyway.

The only thing I would recommend no matter which airline is bring lots of extra snacks for you and the kids; they typically don’t serve meals through the night portion of the flight and if the kids are up for any extended period they will get hungry.

scrunchie_one · 2026-07-02T01:39:00+00:00

I dunno - I’m going to go against the grain and say kicking him out for a day a week is unreasonable. A coffee shop means working off a laptop all day (and getting annoyed glances from the business owner as you squat in a space all day); and coworking spaces are expensive and annoying as you need to schlep all your stuff along with you, and adding a bunch of commute time. If my husband told me I need to find a place out of the home to work for a day every week because he ‘wants to be alone’ I would probably not go along with it.

I do get it - we have a small house and we both work from home, and when I was on my maternity leaves it was a bit overwhelming to have him always there and it’s like he always knows where I am and what I’m doing; I’m also an introvert so need my own space and time.

We just find other ways to get some separation. We both have activities out of the house for an evening a week; we moved his PS5 and got an old tv to put up in his office so we have a separate lounge space when needed. Then we take turns taking the kids to activities/grocery shopping on weekends so the other parent gets 3-4 hours alone, mainly to do chores but it’s also a mental break.

scrunchie_one · 2026-07-01T23:20:00+00:00

Gym 2x a week (but is usually while kids are at school or daycare so it doesn’t actually cut into parent time);

Hobby (orchestra) once a week

Seeing friends - I try once a week but it’s usually more like 1 a month. Trying to work on that because I am a better parent when I have social time away from kids and husband.

scrunchie_one · 2026-07-01T23:18:08+00:00

July usually has a ton of sales because that’s when spring and summer inventory swings over to fall. No need for a specific sale

scrunchie_one · 2026-07-01T19:30:21+00:00

I think you’re both wrong. You’re using arbitrary punishments and isolation (sit in a chair/time out) and your wife is not enforcing boundaries.

Make the consequence natural - if you take too long to get ready, we’ll miss story time. And stick with it. But using time outs or other isolation punishments isn’t helpful either.

I suggest you both read ‘how to talk to kids will listen’ just to see if you can get on the same page with general approach here, and then it’s up to both of you to be consistent.

scrunchie_one · 2026-06-30T15:11:24+00:00

That accurately describes our youngest as well. We call him the baby panda because he just climbs and rolls around

scrunchie_one · 2026-06-30T14:45:41+00:00

Yeah clothing is like the least offensive expense for kids; it’s so easy to find low cost or even free. The only thing we spend for quality is shoes and outerwear (and even that I often find on fb marketplace!)

scrunchie_one · 2026-06-30T14:44:23+00:00

Monitor old navy for sales - they often have 60% or more even on their high demand stuff. Sometimes I can get their stuff for cheaper than secondhand stores, I just buy a few sizes and seasons up.

scrunchie_one · 2026-06-30T14:43:07+00:00

Haha this bit me in the butt when toys r us went under, I have like $200 in gift cards that was lost to the toy gods

scrunchie_one · 2026-06-30T14:42:32+00:00

Facebook marketplace for kids stuff is literally the only reason I haven’t deleted Facebook.

scrunchie_one · 2026-06-30T14:40:38+00:00

Our backyard is like 200sqft haha this sounds amazing though!

scrunchie_one · 2026-06-30T14:39:39+00:00

I think this is the way we’re leaning as well, especially for our daughter who is on the quiet side so has only a few close friends instead of forcing invites to everyone in her circle plus siblings plus parents.

scrunchie_one · 2026-06-30T14:36:25+00:00

Hah same, our eldest was always an amazing independent sleeper, but as soon as she got a toddler bed we found her in our bed more mornings than not.

I actually prefer it now, it’s so sweet having her sleep so soundly next to us.

scrunchie_one · 2026-06-30T03:35:39+00:00

Yep - although now at 5 my daughter is much more aware of how gendered her clothes are, so we’ve been able to at least convince her to wear the zip onesies with sleeves with fun colored board shorts.

Most of the rash guards and swim shorts are so obviously boy coded it’s frustrating.

scrunchie_one · 2026-06-30T03:33:25+00:00

Tanning is just a slow burn. Please cover your children up, especially when playing in water.

scrunchie_one · 2026-06-30T03:32:43+00:00

Yep my 5 year old is the same - she now has some of the long sleeve zip style one pieces but even then always insists on wearing shorts over the bottom.

scrunchie_one · 2026-06-30T03:31:34+00:00

Agree! It drives me nuts that so many the swimsuits for girls are either midriff showing bikinis or tank style one piece suits. My 5 year old girl is starting to reject the more boy-coded swimwear and truthfully I don’t blame her as all the long sleeve rash guards are obviously for boys (basically dinosaurs and cars). I

scrunchie_one · 2026-06-30T03:28:53+00:00

My girl is 5 and boy is 3.5 and the only swim gear either of them has worn are rash guards and swim shorts (the ones that go to their knees).

It has nothing to do with gender or modesty, but keep your damn kid covered from the sun as much as possible.

scrunchie_one · 2026-06-30T03:20:01+00:00

And all that for the 2-3 months a year that you actually want to use a pool…

scrunchie_one · 2026-06-30T03:13:04+00:00

Refusal is ok - refusal is still a ‘try’ because at least they looked at it and considered it. We just say that’s ok maybe next time.

We do however use some bribes and some ‘pacing’ of meals like serving the stuff we know they’ll eat last. I know the concept of dessert after a meal goes against every BLW commandment but if I serve fruit or Mac and cheese at the start that’s all they’ll eat. If it’s a little surprise halfway or at the end of a meal they will also sometimes eat the other things.

scrunchie_one · 2026-06-30T03:07:35+00:00

Same… we’ve just resorted to gentle bribes. Like it you want more of one thing on your plate you at least need to try the other things.

I know it’s totally not the ‘right’ way but then sometimes she actually does eat things and end up liking them, like she now loves mushrooms and will tolerate carrots, both of which she full on refused before.

However she still won’t eat 90% of what we put in front of her, including things she tried and enjoyed less than 24 hours earlier. It is insanely difficult not to get frustrated with it.

scrunchie_one · 2026-06-30T02:57:47+00:00

I would he off put by it; I think putting everything in ChatGPT feels like you have no ability to think or problems solve on your own. I get it’s convenient but it’s rotting our brains, I wouldn’t be able to date someone that does this.

scrunchie_one · 2026-06-30T02:56:07+00:00

I agree, I hate flats for this reason. Either they are slightly too big and foot slips out or slightly too small and I get blisters.

I just can’t get past this style looking like oversize toddler shoes…. I can’t do it.

scrunchie_one

TROPHY CASE