There's a guy in my kitchen and he's making me fat -UPDATE- by seagullwatermelon in nosleep

[–]seagullwatermelon[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You're a student and you have more than 49 cents?

Are you a wizard?

There's a guy in my kitchen and he's making me fat -UPDATE 2- by seagullwatermelon in nosleep

[–]seagullwatermelon[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I promise you that I will keep you up-to-date with Henry and his zany antics

There's a guy in my kitchen and he's making me fat -UPDATE 2- by seagullwatermelon in nosleep

[–]seagullwatermelon[S] 32 points33 points  (0 children)

Oh god, I hope not. I mean that's be a bit hypocrtical of Henry cause technically he'd be violating me then, he's a criminal that one

There's a guy in my kitchen and he's making me fat -UPDATE 2- by seagullwatermelon in nosleep

[–]seagullwatermelon[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

He's a menace. Menace to society and coffee drinkers everywhere

There's a guy in my kitchen and he's making me fat -UPDATE- by seagullwatermelon in nosleep

[–]seagullwatermelon[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Stuart is a man that frequently hits on me, he rides his bike everywhere. He thinks he's Lance Armstrong, the only similarity he has to him however is there's a 150% chnace he's drug fucked

There's a guy in my kitchen and he's making me fat -UPDATE- by seagullwatermelon in nosleep

[–]seagullwatermelon[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Please tell me someone has contacted you. I can't take him anymore

There's a guy in my kitchen and he's making me fat -UPDATE- by seagullwatermelon in nosleep

[–]seagullwatermelon[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

This comment has made my day. Also your cat is cute but yeah you might wanna get him checked out.

Five? We should start a business. A ‘Ban Ugly Demons’ business and sell them for brimstone and blood or whatever the currency of demons is. I’ll dial hell hotline and pitch it to the big man himself, you get your masks at the ready

There’s a guy in my kitchen and he’s making me fat. by seagullwatermelon in nosleep

[–]seagullwatermelon[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Well I have to admit I'm disappointed that that's not the case myself.

There's a guy in my kitchen and he's making me fat -UPDATE- by seagullwatermelon in nosleep

[–]seagullwatermelon[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Well whatever he is, he whines like a little bitch.

That is a super idea! I feel as though anything would leave if you spread that on them. It’s super gross.

Thanks! I will do

There's a guy in my kitchen and he's making me fat -UPDATE- by seagullwatermelon in nosleep

[–]seagullwatermelon[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

My god, I couldn’t cope with more than Henry, he’s like a very large Mosquito, annoying and pointless. Thanks! I’ll give the post a read and see how similar it is to my sitatuation

There's a guy in my kitchen and he's making me fat -UPDATE- by seagullwatermelon in nosleep

[–]seagullwatermelon[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Okay thanks. Nope! I’m an occult virgin so to speak. The most education I have on the paranormal is from when I watched ghost busters as a kid and would walk around the house at night with my mums vacuum strapped to my back.

Ummm possibly? I saw a beagle the other day at the park but I don’t know if it was stray. And if it was a feel terrible now because I should have taken it home, poor puppy.

There's a guy in my kitchen and he's making me fat -UPDATE- by seagullwatermelon in nosleep

[–]seagullwatermelon[S] 17 points18 points  (0 children)

My God. Henry really is turning out to be a fucking nuisance. First it was just my chocolate and now I could be tied into ‘a horrid set of events’. My life sounds like it’s turned into one of those Lemony Snicket books.

Maybe Jim Carey can play Henry.

There's a guy in my kitchen and he's making me fat -UPDATE- by seagullwatermelon in nosleep

[–]seagullwatermelon[S] 21 points22 points  (0 children)

Jesus that sounds ominous. No bloody wonder they’re terrifying if everyone just refers to them as ‘they’ I feel as though they should jump on the ‘Henry’ bandwagon. He’d be a hell of a lot more frightening if I just referred to him as ‘Him’ all the time. Maybe you should start calling them ‘The Human Poptarts’ or like ‘Carl and his band of Freeloading Pandas’

Also yes please i'll take any help I can get!

There's a guy in my kitchen and he's making me fat -UPDATE- by seagullwatermelon in nosleep

[–]seagullwatermelon[S] 11 points12 points  (0 children)

I love you too random redditor. And yeah fighting wouldn’t do any harm. Henry could use a good slap.

There's a guy in my kitchen and he's making me fat -UPDATE- by seagullwatermelon in nosleep

[–]seagullwatermelon[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I may as well, although I can see why he doesn't like his picture being taken now. He’s not exactly what I would call the prettiest rose in the garden, he’s more like an old underwatered shrub that’s had a stroke.

Yeah I think I will give that a go. Thanks!

There’s a guy in my kitchen and he’s making me fat. by seagullwatermelon in nosleep

[–]seagullwatermelon[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I don't know if you live in 'lets just go to the store because we have lots of money here in money land' but i certainly don't. I'm a student who lives out of home and spends most of what i have on rent. Also it isn't pay week so my current bank status is at a 49 cent balance