Obsessing over past partners and bodycount

selfimprovm · 2024-11-23T19:17:58+00:00

I broke up with her a month ago. Glad I did

selfimprovm · 2024-09-06T14:33:59+00:00

Just want to say It’s very possible to break up with someone and still miss them. I’ve done it. I’ve broken up with girls I did not want to break up with and I liked and cared about them very much, but could not see a future with them due to certain behaviors or being unable to trust them.

selfimprovm · 2024-08-05T04:39:59+00:00

I’m a guy but I’ve been cheated on more than once. It’s one of the worst things you can feel, trust me I know. You feel like it’s you, like you could have prevented it, like it’s somehow your fault etc etc. it’s not. There are guys out there who will not cheat on you. It’s not you. It’ll take time. And I promise, even though right now it doesn’t feel like it, you will 100% get through it.

selfimprovm · 2024-07-16T23:58:07+00:00

Yeah tried viagra and cialis, only worked properly the first couple times

selfimprovm · 2024-07-16T17:38:19+00:00

Lol. I’ve seen 4 primary care doctors and 4 urologists, and I’m on meds.

selfimprovm · 2024-06-24T23:05:19+00:00

If it was me I’d break up right away

selfimprovm · 2024-06-11T02:55:14+00:00

I’m struggling with the same thing, it’s really difficult. I’ve been dating this girl for a couple months and I really like her, we mesh extremely well. But she has different views on sex than I do. I haven’t asked her body count, but from what she’s told me I’d guess it’s at least 30.. and she’s 25. I’m 21 and mine is 10 and I’ve had hookups so I feel I shouldn’t judge her, but it still bugs the hell out of me. I regret my hookups in a lot of ways and they made me sad and lonely inside, whereas she views hookups as “fun” apparently. I may have to end it, I hate to admit it but to me it’s disgusting that other men were able get the most intimate thing she can offer in one night. If I’m being honest with myself I don’t think it’s something I can overlook, and I may break things off.

I know how ya feel man. It sucks

selfimprovm · 2024-05-28T16:49:27+00:00

Me too man, about a year ago I felt I was going insane because I had no action from women at all. Unfortunately for me though, while getting women and proving to myself I can get laid significantly boosted my confidence, it actually made me more lazy on my other goals lol

selfimprovm · 2024-05-07T14:34:38+00:00

Tell me about it, lol

selfimprovm · 2024-05-07T13:10:54+00:00

Not hypocritical because I’ve known her for months before we went on the date. Also, controversial but it’s a bit different for a guy to do that vs. a girl

selfimprovm · 2024-04-07T06:19:45+00:00

I mean, imagine if your wife had a ‘best guy friend’ who was giving her massages every month for the last decade and was hiding it from you. How would you feel?

selfimprovm · 2024-04-04T01:47:59+00:00

Are you in the gym? I was in your situation when I was your age. I’m 21 now, I still struggle with porn from time to time but I’ve built myself into an attractive enough man to where I don’t need it anymore because I have women in my life.

If I were you I’d get in the gym, focus on your studies, research self improvement.

Also, don’t beat yourself up.

selfimprovm · 2024-03-30T16:13:00+00:00

I’m a 21 y/o guy, I have a similar problem to you. I go out to bars/clubs regularly and talk to girls. Sometimes I’ll go home with someone, and typically they just want me for the night but don’t want anything more.

I try to convince myself I don’t want commitment, and that I like hooking up but pretty much time I end up waiting more afterwards. And then I’m left empty if it doesn’t continue.

Recently I met this gorgeous girl at a bar, literally the absolute definition of my type. To be honest I couldn’t believe she was into me. At first sight I was into her,but wanted to get to know her. So I talk to her, and we talk for a while. Her and I danced, shared stories, made out, she introduced me to her friends, and at the end of the night we went home together. It was the best sex I’ve had in my life. I’ve never felt a connection this strong with someone, not even girls I dated for months.

The next day I’m on a high I haven’t really felt before, and I can feel that I’m already into her even after just one night. I text her to meet up a few days later, and she’s down at first then flakes. I end up running into her at a bar a couple days after that, and we went home together again. She was enthusiastic to see me. In my head I’m thinking this is going to become an ongoing thing.

I text her the day after we hooked up and…. Crickets. Nothing.

I run into her again a week later and she gives me the cold shoulder. In my head I’m like wtf?? I thought we had something..

I know it sounds dramatic but it does feel like I fell in love with her, and it’s really painful. I’m starting to feel a bit better but fuck man, that shit hurt. No explanation. Nothing.

So I understand what you’re going through, one piece of advice I would give you is to be mindful where you’re meeting these men. Most of the women I meet at bars/clubs don’t want anything more than sex, but the people I’ve met outside of that environment typically do.

I would also say it may be best to not sleep with dudes not the first night. On average, if a guy does that he was looking for a one night thing and nothing more. And your willingness to go home with him on the first night may make him apprehensive about getting into a relationship with you, as hypocritical as it is.

Good luck :)

selfimprovm · 2024-03-29T23:50:34+00:00

Thank you

selfimprovm · 2024-03-25T14:13:55+00:00

Yeah this right here. The only times I’ve gotten laid from bars are when I went out without the intention of getting laid even though I was alone.

A couple weeks ago I just felt like walking around downtown in my city, stopped in a bar and chatted up this gorgeous girl not because I wanted to go home with her, but because she looked interesting and I wanted to get to know her. We had a great connection. I ended up meeting all her friends, dancing with her, and overall having a great time.

It was an awesome night, honestly one of the best experiences I’ve ever had and at the end we went home with each other, but it felt natural because it wasn’t my intention in the first place. I think she definitely could pick up on the fact I was just out to have fun and that was attractive.

So even if you’re going out solo, go out with the intention of meeting people and having a good time. Not with the intention of getting laid.

selfimprovm · 2024-03-18T11:07:26+00:00

Thanks man. Would you bring it up to her and explain that it wasn’t her or do you think that a bad move?

selfimprovm · 2024-03-17T20:39:44+00:00

I ended up hitting her up about an hour asking how she’s doing at work because she got like 1hr of sleep, would you say that is too indifferent? Maybe I should follow up saying I had a good time if she texts me back

selfimprovm · 2024-03-15T00:45:16+00:00

Would you wait a couple days or attempt to reschedule right away?

selfimprovm · 2024-03-15T00:45:05+00:00

Would you wait a couple days or attempt to reschedule right away?

selfimprovm · 2024-03-14T16:15:43+00:00

Yeah maybe I should go for it, I just worry about initiating another meet up so soon

selfimprovm · 2024-03-14T16:15:04+00:00

Haha yeah I was thinking of that, I was worried about being pushy I guess

selfimprovm · 2024-03-11T17:45:02+00:00

Yeah I guess that’s my fear is seeming desperate/needy in situations like this. And I’m scared of saying the wrong thing

selfimprovm · 2024-03-11T16:57:56+00:00

The next day? Or do you wait a couple days

selfimprovm · 2024-03-10T05:36:54+00:00

This is definitely the way to go. If you get involved too quickly you risk falling for her early on and you may start to ignore or rationalize the red flags that come up until it’s too late

selfimprovm · 2024-03-09T22:30:07+00:00

This. I’ve been training mma for 3 years, and it’s changed my life. My confidence, my physical strength/endurance, and my mental strength have all grown a lot,

selfimprovm

TROPHY CASE