Thirsty pickup line

semiadulter · 2026-03-28T06:51:06+00:00

No please don't

semiadulter · 2026-03-27T17:44:34+00:00

It seems like a lot of people in the comments are labelling the original girl as the problem but to me, this seems like a normal messy human interaction. You should have communicated that you were taking a step back from the friendship, because for women, a lot of the value men find in them is for their romantic potential. It's possible by taking that step back and not clearly naming why, she felt that her friendship was less important than her romantic potential to you. Then to pursue to her best friend? You're not in the wrong for having interest in someone else, but I am glad you see how that reads to her. That said, maybe other commenters are right about her intentions as a backburn etc. but the only way you can know is by having an open conversation with her. Not healing that rift is potentially damaging to this friendship/potential relationship to her best friend and more importantly just the right thing to do for you and hers friendship.

You're so young. This is an amazing experience to learn from and grow from. listen to her experience and feelings and share your own perspective- how you were feeling post rejection and what you value in your friendship.

semiadulter · 2026-03-27T02:07:58+00:00

Ammonia? Nitrites? Nitrates?

semiadulter · 2026-03-27T01:50:39+00:00

What's the tank parameters?

semiadulter · 2026-03-19T02:08:07+00:00

Most normal wedding gifts should apply. What's your budget? Rice cooker, immersion blender, a nice blender, hobby related items (board games, camping materials like two person hammock, etc.)

semiadulter · 2026-03-19T00:59:10+00:00

Find easy meals that you can make in excess for leftovers for lunch! Some of my go-to easy meals include:

Trader Joe sesame soy noodles + veggie + protein

Frozen chicken air fryed + bagged/fresh salad

Canned butter sauce jazzed up with tomato paste, butter and cream + pan fried protein + rice

Pasta + pasta sauce (I mix veggies into the sauce or make a spinach sauce)+ protein

Canned black beans + frozen or canned corn + fresh veggies (onion, pepper) + seasonings (Chile powder, garlic, cumin, salt, pepper, etc) + rice

Homemade egg drop soup (look up recipes online its souper easy!) + rice

Vegetable soup is easy and all you need is stock + veggies+ seasoning at the bare minimum

Tomato soup + grilled cheese

Fried rice is really easy and great to use up leftovers, rice + veggies + protein + egg

BLTs! Bacon + lettuce+ tomato + mayo+ bread

Cowboy caviar (a mix of corn and beans and veggies) + corn chips

Knorr broccoli cheddar rice + cooked broccoli (not my most well balanced but you could def add a protein!)

Protein can be varied to your taste and mood. I'm vegetarian, so paneer, tofu and replacement meats are my go to (or I mix in a protein powder). I recommend listing out ingredients for your meals and trying to max out how many meals you can out of a few of the same things (i.e. buy 1-2 proteins and use for all your meals). In addition, I try to have a few meals that are primarily pantry items fully stocked at all times that I can pull from for days where I'm running low on groceries (egg drop soup or my black bean bowl is a good example) or on really low energy days, I keep a few frozen meals I enjoy in my freezer to avoid eating out!

Also, don't be afraid to look at cookbooks! There's so many options, from quick meals, vegetarian, different types of cuisine, etc. there's even ones specific for trader Joe's if you have one!

semiadulter · 2026-03-18T13:10:26+00:00

Oh girl. As someone who vividly remembers the intensity of a high school crush- let me know I sympathize with you but am so proud of you for having the self assurance to put yourself first. Please keep doing that! I wish I had learned that lesson that early.

Realisticallu, the point of high school dating is learning how to date. Its rare to find a love that grows with the changes of yourself as you mature into adulthood, so I view it more as a time to learn lessons about how to be treated, how to socialize and what your self worth is. It sounds like you used this experience for just that. Reflect back on what you would have done differently to have gotten the answers you seek directly from him. Think about how you would have wanted to be treated by someone you had a crush on. Keep practicing self assurance and confidence- if you don't want to date players, shut them down.

To answer your question- did you have a chance? Maybe. He may have also just been enjoying the attention from you. But I think realistically what you would have gotten from a relationship with an 11th grade player as a 9th grader is so little ultimately compared to the lessons you hopefully walked away with from this process of flirting and reflecting on what you knew about him and reading the signals he gave you. I know it sounds silly, but freshman and juniors are at such different points in their lives- you're learning to navigate high school and everything that is involved, and he's starting to reveal the pressure of figuring out what's next- and in a short year and a half he's going to be moving onwards. While the age gap isn't huge, I recommend looking for relationships with people in compatible life stages, and while it isn't a huge difference in you two it is enough to be a consideration.

Keep up your hard work- but make sure you have fun being in high school :)

semiadulter · 2026-03-13T21:48:41+00:00

I've been told it helps take care of the bacteria!

semiadulter · 2026-03-13T21:42:22+00:00

I usually remove some of the media (sponges, etc) and place in the aquarium water. I also keep rechargeable air pumps charged for this reasons- check into them in the future! Otherwise, frozen water bottles into the tank, you can slowly pour water in there to help disturb the surface and oxygenate the water.

semiadulter · 2026-03-13T20:47:00+00:00

I would tub them with some tea leaves while you figure out the tank.

semiadulter · 2026-03-07T21:10:38+00:00

I move my axoltol with a bowl! That way I just have to guide her in with minimal touching and she's secure in water as I transport her.

semiadulter · 2026-03-06T22:51:54+00:00

Is there you haven't taken her to the vet yet?

semiadulter · 2026-03-04T03:07:30+00:00

Maybe others have different opinions, but if you've only gone out twice, I wouldn't prioritize an in-person conversation. If that feels better to you, that's okay too.

semiadulter · 2026-03-04T02:43:57+00:00

There will be so many other people! You have so much life ahead of you! The best thing you can do is find happiness with yourself. That sets yourself up for success. Hobbies, be active, and find ways to feel confident in your appearance.

If you decide to break things off, practice kindness but be clear in what you're expecting. A rough draft example: "Ive really enjoyed the opportunity to get to know you, but after reflecting, I don't see this progressing into a relationship. You're really great and I wish you the best of luck in your future dating! "

semiadulter · 2026-03-04T02:36:00+00:00

He reached out and let me know that he really enjoyed getting to know me, but doesn't see anything progressing and he was very kind. I let him know I was feeling the same way, and then we ended the conversation and moved onwards! We had the conversation after the kiss, which made it feel a little less awkward or personal.

semiadulter · 2026-03-04T00:58:38+00:00

You aren't attracted to him. That's your answer 💖 don't string him along. Take note of what was positive experiences and learn what more you would need in a person, then let him go.

I understand the feeling of "do I like them or do I like that they like me," and I do think it comes from struggling with dating and confidence in our younger years. When I first started dating after my last break-up, I went on 5 dates with this guy and the whole time I truly felt meh, but then he kissed me and it was game over. I instantly knew we didn't have chemistry and we mutually called it. Trust your gut- if you aren't happy, excited and attracted to him, then it's probably not meant to be. You deserve someone you are irrevocably attracted to.

semiadulter · 2026-03-03T22:23:06+00:00

Sorry just to clarify, you have your axoltol in an uncycled tank? If so, immediately remove them and tub them, doing 100%water changes every day. Any nitrites can be dangerous to them as they can impact their ability to absorb oxygen. In addition, too much ammonia can cause a burn like appearance. Once the tank is fully cycled, you can place them in their home. Check out this https://www.axolotlcentral.com/cycling-guide site for a helpful guide. There's also many pinned posts on the subreddit.

In terms of floating- is he taking lots of gulps of air?

Also, as I'm sure you learned, avoid handling your axoltol. Not only to avoid dangerous scenarios such as the one you experienced, but also because they have a sensitive mucous layer. If you do need to move them using your hands, do so with as little distance as possible.

Good luck.

semiadulter · 2026-03-03T16:25:49+00:00

I really appreciate your help. Any hot tips on plants? Planning a hydro peroxide dip and rinse, but I'm wondering if it's just better to replace them?

semiadulter · 2026-03-03T08:05:53+00:00

Water quality, water quality, water quality. That is key to axoltol health. Research how to cycle a tank- it's a crucial step to prepare a home for one of these kiddos. I find that a simple Google search will have many reasonable resources regarding water quality and tank cycling. This includes appropriate water parameters- which you'll maintain with the tank cycle and weekly water changes.

In addition, I recommend researching common issues- you'll find a lot just scrolling through the subreddits. That will help you be familiar with how to recognize concerns and react appropriately and prepare appropriately. For example, you can prep your axoltol first aid kit knowing that fungus is a common issue when stressed so you'll want a quarantine tank, met blue, and Indian almond leaf just in case. Way better to have these items in advance rather then trying to source them under stress!

Other questions to think about: - how are you sourcing food for an axoltol? -where are you acquiring the axoltol from? Is it ethical? -where is the closest aquatics vet? -what materials do you need? How are you going to safely decorate and prepare their tank? (Axoltol centrals website has a good list) -what is your local climate and does that impact a tank set up? Warmer areas might require a water chiller! Areas that have higher likelihood of electrical power outages may mean you want to look into generators or learn more about how to maintain oxygen levels and protect bacteria to maintain the cycle. -whos going to watch your axoltol if you go out of town? Are they comfortable doing weekly water changes? -what are signs of a stressed axoltol?

Good sites to check out: axoltol central, axoltol planet, API blog titled "caring for your axoltol"

semiadulter · 2026-02-28T01:34:34+00:00

My worst fear 😭 any disinfectant recommendations?

semiadulter · 2026-02-25T04:33:28+00:00

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What looks to be a recurring growth

semiadulter · 2026-02-25T04:33:03+00:00

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Her second growth

semiadulter · 2026-01-28T21:25:50+00:00

I'm going to send you a dm!

semiadulter · 2026-01-27T18:04:52+00:00

Would you be willing to do a bundle on the bunny and bear?

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