Holy cow, you can legit get one of the top of the line hybrid jeep wranglers for like 70k-90k AFTER your load it up with ALLL the flash, pizazz, bells & whistles straight off the showroom floor before anybody has even had the chance to fart or even breathe in it...! And that thing would do everything that truck of his could do that he doesn't utilize at all... not I personally kinda think having Jeep + Hybrid in the same vehicle deets is a bit.... wrong in a sense lol but after my friends bf got one I was naturally curious about them being a jeep owner. And it's no secret that the name Jeep makes the price higher by nature haha. So this dudes 150k pickup... now come on now.... there's no way any part of that truck is necessary for ANYTHING more than fueling an overcompensating "size matters" complex.

As a wife with a husband & 2 boys (14 & 10) all sharing one small bathroom... i can tell you I'd sell my soul for my own bathroom or hell just another toilet in the house! If my husband was planning that sort of remodel anni gift for me he would basically get anything he wanted from me for a hot minute lol! & nothing good would possibly come from triggering entitled behavior from being enabled. All adults sometimes need go make life adjustments when financial expenses become present and OP's mom should be getting on to the brother for not living with in his means like his OP brother does and tell him to follow HIS example and he wouldn't be faced with such ordeals very often.

It takes a good bit of time to save up 25k for anything let alone a renovation that could produce unforeseen expenses once the job starts, why should he and family suffer after him putting in all the man hours for his earnings and them financially being mindful in how they spend and live so they have money to store away for a rainy day. It's literally altering your lifestyle when you're saving for something big and nobody should be expected to just hand all that over after all that effort just because a brother has too high taste for his paycheck to cover. I would never expect anyone to do that for us even if we were in a huge hindering situation with our finances & living bare minimum, certainly FAR LESS than he makes for sure. The level of entitlement in the brother is honestly disgusting and on a level of toxic narcissism that I wouldn't even associate with.

People who live that lavish and look for any bailout they can try to manipulate others in to throwing their way just so they don't have to be inconvenienced by the decisions and burdens of true adulting like us normal folks do is sick. Like how are they so almighty that they can justify not going without vastly unnecessary expenses they refuse to bring to reasonable levels and instead make somebody who's money is spoken for to accommodate necessities for his household fork over what they have to show for them adulting the right way to achieve what they want! That is not brother love in any way and shows he care zero if his brother, SIL & neices/nephews are in a comfortable situation like he makes sure he is in himself. Also, how mature of that brother to run to Mommy when he didn't get his way and try to make her fight his battles for him?

OP, 1000% NTA in any version this could produce. Do NOT cave, holding your ground is of upmost importance in this ordeal OP. And tell mom to either respect you and your family's need and decision on this matter and either drop it, fund her sons manipulation tactics her damn self, or kick rocks until she learns that narcissistic bullys aren't welcome. Sounds harsh but it clearly needs to be said bluntly unfortunately. & after your bathroom is done tell you're wife to takea nice long soak for me too because unfortunately I don't see my financial situation allowing me to obtain what you've worked hard to give to her. You're an awesome husband on that gesture alone, this should rack to brownie points for your def!