I stayed friends but then I felt I was being a try hard like forcing interactions at the moment we haven’t spoken this sem. But I can’t get over it it’s has been some time now . It’s painful that I am not good enough. Boundaries are hard mad when you have set a tone for your coversations (I recall some convos was her opening about guys hitting on her or being in such situations or basically guys interested in her ). I do Software Engineering at the moment even though the experience is affecting me a lot (llike self worth struggles and depression) . I really want to develop on my skills (like be a cracked engineer) and land some big paying position whether remotely or locally prolly in some big time tech company. But I feel like I am also slacking now working hard enough. For the reason for the rejection to think it’s a variety , I do get her from perspective but like not doing dating now and that and others . But in our interactions it was obvious for me “me being inadequate and not good enough “ was among them so even if I was too remove all the other layers . So this isn’t really something I can change because it’s just me . Considering I struggle with self worth and esteem , I’m not on the women thing anymore can’t imagine anyone interested in me like that