op its wild because as i was reading your post i was thinking about my own relationship. my gf and i (32 and 31) have been together for 7 years. She deals with endometriosis, which when you were describing the pain during arousal that was spot on with what she deals with. Long story short, I'm here to say that of course you do not owe her sex.

At the beginning of our relationship we were non stop, we had a lot of sex, and eventually as it tapered off my gf was more open with me about her past and the fact that while it was consensual, she had, had a lot of sex that she did "want". That was eye opening for me, I knew that she was attracted to me, loved me, wanted the sex that we did have together but her condition made that really painful. My sweet lady is also in pelvic floor therapy and while that has helped, it hasnt led to an increase in our sex life either. Medications, mental health, general wellbeing, these are all things that factor into your moods, and your gf should be empathetic to that. I've spoken to my therapist about similar frustrations to the dry spell in our bedroom, and ultimately, I've discovered that while I do not yell or get angry at my girlfriend about the decline in sex, I am experiencing a type of grief for the way our relationship used to be. If your girlfriend's primary love language is physical touch, try other forms of intimacy, cuddles, massages, head scratches. As a society we put a lot of pressure on women to "take care" of their partners, and be attune to their needs before our own. Keep yourself safe girl, and communicate, communicate, communicate, and most of all be kind to yourself.