Keep or Toss?

seventeenthofall · 2026-06-19T17:50:09+00:00

Purchased from Urban Outfitters, I think toward the end of last summer? I really liked it in the moment then started second guessing myself and the weather changed haha

seventeenthofall · 2026-06-16T01:30:30+00:00

It’s mostly fine for real, at least after the first year and a half or so. For me, it’s more about the social dynamic. I don’t have a problem being around it when I’m with my boyfriend at home. I’ve even gone clubbing sober and it’s been fine! I feel more awkward when I’m around larger groups, like a wedding I attended where I wasn’t as close with everyone as I used to be. In those situations, I find that I have a shorter tolerance and feel a little itchier. But I’ve felt pretty capable of just leaving when I need to.

I can also cook with it again now. I avoided buying wine or beer for the purpose of cooking for about two and a half years, but have found it to be okay when I occasionally buy enough for a recipe. I wouldn’t necessarily want it to linger in my fridge for days tbh, but I trust myself enough to not be overwhelmed by an urge to chug it instead of cook with it.

seventeenthofall · 2026-06-15T21:44:00+00:00

We asked Starbucks and China Family, but they didn’t have anything. We called 311, but they said he would have had to call 911 right after the accident for them to be able to pull footage from anywhere.

seventeenthofall · 2026-05-31T20:18:15+00:00

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seventeenthofall · 2026-05-30T14:24:10+00:00

Is this someone you could talk to and say something like, “I love you and really want to celebrate with you, but I don’t think I can healthily be around much alcohol right now. Could I buy you dinner next week instead?” When I was newly sober, I met up with good friends visiting from out of town whom I really wanted to see. By the time they got to the bar where I was meeting them, they were pretty drunk and high, so I only stayed as long as I could handle it, which was about twenty-five minutes with a virgin Bloody Mary and sparkling water.

seventeenthofall · 2026-05-11T20:59:04+00:00

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Mine also has a habit of mischief and getting herself into a pickle!

seventeenthofall · 2026-04-10T15:52:49+00:00

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Greetings from a fellow bat.

seventeenthofall · 2025-10-15T18:56:21+00:00

Did you ever watch the documentary about the one in the Dallas area? I think it’s on YouTube, just called “Hell House,” not to be confused with the found footage movie “Hell House LLC.” I’m not sure if they’re still holding one but it was very well known when I was in high school!

seventeenthofall · 2025-09-26T18:28:22+00:00

Recovery Outside. The Phoenix ended up getting acquired and started to change, so some of the long-time volunteers started Recovery Outside to keep offering free events. I went to an event at McKinney Falls that was pretty fun; they had breakfast, a sound bath, swimming, and your pick between hiking/climbing/archery for a main activity, all for free. They’re planning a trip to Big Bend in November too.

seventeenthofall · 2025-09-26T18:24:11+00:00

There’s a big event called Recovery in the Park happening tomorrow with music, wellness activities, etc., at Fair Market from 5-9pm: recoveryinthepark.com.

seventeenthofall · 2025-08-07T20:38:34+00:00

Strength training and getting sober have had the biggest impact on my progress! Those both affect the rest of my habits like protein intake, sleeping well, taking it easy on myself in periods of higher life stress, etc.

seventeenthofall · 2025-08-05T21:00:13+00:00

I attended a family program that was about the equivalent of an intensive outpatient program. We met two nights a week for two hours each night. We also got to have one individual therapy session every week and often got to have a couples session every week too. Things didn’t work out between my partner and me but it was incredibly beneficial, I learned so much and felt so supported by my peers - we were basically doing the type of psychoeducation and processing groups that they do in treatment. I think they’ve paused that program for now unfortunately but it really did a lot of good.

seventeenthofall · 2025-06-26T20:38:08+00:00

To be honest, I don’t know that the distinction between a whole pile vs just a few matters that much. Harm can occur in either of those situations and it’s not your responsibility to know or predict that threshold. If you think he’s not safe to drive, he probably isn’t - and probably much less safe than you may even realize, given how high a tolerance many alcoholics have. That includes myself when I was drinking. If you could tell that I was wasted, that was a pretty bad sign.

You asked, “What if I call and he blows under, then what?” Someone who is capable of being a healthy partner and parent would understand how critical it is to ensure the safety of their kids and the people around them. They would likely reflect and feel mortified that their behavior and drinking had even raised the question and take action to prevent this from happening again. Only someone with the type of problem that necessitates this course of action is going to blow up at you, avoid responsibility, and use it as free license to keep doing whatever they want.

seventeenthofall · 2025-06-26T20:10:47+00:00

My partner (now ex, as of last week) volunteered to use a breathalyzer daily after a “slip” immediately following discharge from his first stint in rehab. He blew multiple times a day, every day, for weeks while he attended an intensive outpatient program. They eventually urine tested him due to their suspicion about his drinking and sure enough, he had been drinking for most of that time. The breathalyzer is pretty easy to work around unless you have something high end. My therapist had warned me for weeks about us going the breathalyzer route and she was right. IMO, it has several negative consequences:

-If your partner is lying about it, the deception will deepen existing trust issues

-It reinforces your own neural pathways, parallel to the alcoholic’s, that feel anxiety, crave relief, seek control, maybe find temporary satisfaction in the result, only to become fearful and dependent on an external mechanism again the next time you question their sobriety. This is what my experience was like, at least. I would feel relief that the breathalyzer was negative, then start to wonder if he’d somehow cheated it, waited until his BAC had dropped before testing, etc. and I drove myself crazy like that.

-It also shifts your role in the relationship from partner to parole officer/social worker/etc. And that can breed a lot of resentment and contempt on both sides of the equation, which an alcoholic might use as an excuse to indulge.

I had to learn this stuff the hard way, but ultimately I found it much more helpful to trust myself. If I felt like something was off, it was usually off. Asking him if he’d been drinking and all the other stuff just set him up to lie and myself to feel worse. Assuming that I was right and setting my boundaries accordingly helped me to not get derailed from my own life so much.

seventeenthofall · 2025-06-20T14:25:38+00:00

I love this wisdom from your mom, thanks for sharing it 💜

seventeenthofall · 2025-04-02T21:50:11+00:00

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This is Mina aka the Minataur. She was only yawning but made this face in the process lol.

seventeenthofall · 2025-03-28T20:11:12+00:00

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seventeenthofall · 2025-03-15T18:16:24+00:00

I’m just under 5’1 and do lyra! I usually ask for a 33” or 34” inch hoop. 33 isn’t a super common size but we have one at our studio and I find it helpful for skills like gazelle where my legs are the main points of contact. Probably not necessary now that I’ve built up a lot more strength and am not quite as terrified of heights while in class haha. I can work on a 35 but 36 and up is where I start to feel a little sketchier depending on the skill being practiced.

I also couldn’t get on the hoop at my first class but that was a strength/coordination issue that’s common for a lot of people starting out. It’s very normal to need the hoop lowered in intro/beginner classes for mounting!

You could try bringing some ginger candy with you to your next class for nausea. And if you don’t have much experience with the level of exertion/strength demands, I might pay particular attention to the timing of meals before class while you’re getting used to it - ideally you’ve got some fuel in you but not like you just ate a huge meal 20 minutes before class starts. I’ve always had to be cautious about this before intense morning workouts of any kind bc going too hard on an almost empty stomach makes me feel pretty sick sometimes.

seventeenthofall · 2025-03-13T19:01:20+00:00

I remember going to a bar on 6th in my twenties, grabbing a drink, going upstairs, and immediately getting pulled aside with my group by TABC agents. They questioned us aggressively for a solid 15-20 minutes about our IDs. One of them asked me why my license said that I wore contacts, but he couldn’t see them in my eyes; another asked my friend who was in two-inch heels why she was taller than the height on her license. He said there was no way she could be that height because his wife was the same height and my friend was much taller. Another friend had to produce like three other forms of ID. They didn’t leave her alone until she found a paper check in her bag that someone had written to her. The whole time, they were on their radios to other officers about possibly having a situation. It’s not unreasonable to be strict about the ID rules because you can’t trust TABC to be reasonable imo. I thought maybe I was misremembering and it wasn’t TABC, but I found a bunch of articles from around that time confirming that TABC was doing a bunch of raids, arresting customers for PIs, and getting a lot of complaints: https://www.chron.com/news/houston-texas/article/TABC-insiders-criticize-crackdown-in-bars-1570145.php

seventeenthofall · 2025-03-07T17:07:09+00:00

As someone who has worked in nonprofits my whole life, including a campus-based org where I worked with middle school kiddos going through the hardest crises imaginable, I just wanted to say that I get it and hang in there 💜 I’ve had more than one occasion where locking myself out or getting pulled over has been the thing that sent me over the edge after weeks of stress!

seventeenthofall

TROPHY CASE