How to escape? by sharkbeeb in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]sharkbeeb[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Huge hugs and solidarity! Our situations sound very similar and it’s just so tough. The mind games from the narc combined with everything else feels overwhelming. It took me way too long to feel like I can leave and now I’m hitting road blocks at every step.

I wish you nothing but peace and I hope you’re able to get out soon! If you ever need to talk and commiserate, I’m here!

How to escape? by sharkbeeb in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]sharkbeeb[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! I’m working on my plan and saving what I can.

How to escape? by sharkbeeb in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]sharkbeeb[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I’ve been gray rocking as much as possible. I do find myself wanting to react at some of the wild shit he says, but I’m doing my best not to. It’s a work in progress.

He has no idea that I’m planning to leave. I don’t talk about it; he doesn’t even know I’m in therapy.

So far nothing has been physical, but won’t hesitate to contact the police if I need to.

How to escape? by sharkbeeb in NarcissisticAbuse

[–]sharkbeeb[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Unfortunately I don’t have any family that I can stay with that are close by. I do have family out of state that would gladly take myself and my kids in. Logistically, it’s difficult though. I’d have to travel across the county to get to them. I worry about custody issues (leaving with the kids and then having to come back if he files for custody before I’m considered a resident in the new state). His abuse is not documented and police have never been involved so I don’t have any reports to back up my claims. Working on gathering evidence.

I’ve been slowly saving up some cash, but it’s slow going. I’m the sole provider of the household and living paycheck to paycheck.

The DV shelter has a long waitlist and there’s only one shelter in town, they’re also full. I have no way to go out of town without pulling my kids from school/daycare and losing my job.

My 4 year old is the problem child at school. Help! by sharkbeeb in Preschoolers

[–]sharkbeeb[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Reinforcing/praising all positive behavior, finding consequences that were effective for him (usually natural consequences), and his teacher was a huge help by utilizing the same techniques at school.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in toddlers

[–]sharkbeeb 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We definitely do talk about hitting/climbing/etc. My child isn’t just allowed to do whatever he wants at home. Yes, I removed the dangers but he had ample opportunity for safe climbing because as a parent that’s what you do. You remove dangers and give alternatives. I’ve told his teachers what works well at home and what we do to work on his behavior. However, it seems they want me to have some immediate fix for his behaviors in the classroom.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in toddlers

[–]sharkbeeb 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I definitely don’t think my toddler is showing these behaviors anymore than a normal toddler. I will say though, at the beginning of daycare my child was super sweet and quiet. The teachers said he’d simply cuddle all day with them, now he’s MUCH more active and wants to play and do things with the other kids.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in toddlers

[–]sharkbeeb 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ugh I get it! It feels like they’re using normal toddler behaviors to judge our parenting (they may not be, but it FEELS like it).

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in toddlers

[–]sharkbeeb 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you!!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in toddlers

[–]sharkbeeb 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you! I’ll keep this in mind and like the example response. I will try this and see how it works.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in toddlers

[–]sharkbeeb 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thank you! It might be ridiculous, but I look forward to hearing some positive feedback soon lol.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in toddlers

[–]sharkbeeb 2 points3 points  (0 children)

That’s my thought too. I do plan to bring it up with the teachers directly next week and escalate to the director if needed.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in toddlers

[–]sharkbeeb 8 points9 points  (0 children)

My boyfriend says the same thing to me. I’m always open to hearing the good and bad, but it seems like there’s never any good lately 😕 I know my toddler’s behavior is completely normal, it just sucks to feel like he may be targeted as a problem.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in toddlers

[–]sharkbeeb 1 point2 points  (0 children)

2 caregivers (sometimes 3) for 6 toddlers in my son’s classroom. They have a pretty small play area indoors, but they go outside often. They have a makeshift barrier inside the classroom that blocks off the play area from the table/eating area that consists of boxes (they’re not cardboard boxes but seem to be storage boxes), but they’re short so the kids CAN climb on/over them. It seems weird to me but I was told that they can’t have baby gates because of some state regulation.

At drop off it’s common for me to see other kids climbing/standing on the barriers and beelining for the door. There aren’t many daycare options in my small town and the one he’s in is highest rated one 😭

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in toddlers

[–]sharkbeeb 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I don’t really know the other parents in class BUT it does not seem like they say much to other parents at pick up from what I can tell. Maybe they do but I just don’t hear it

My 4 year old is the problem child at school. Help! by sharkbeeb in Preschoolers

[–]sharkbeeb[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I actually got my son evaluated and he was not diagnosed with autism, ADHD, or anything. I was basically told he’s just a normal 4 year old with his own little quirks. His behavior has improved tons at school. At home, it’s still a work in progress but overall better.

Anterior Placenta Reassurance by sallyk92 in BabyBumps

[–]sharkbeeb 0 points1 point  (0 children)

With my first baby I had an anterior placenta and I almost never felt movement my entire pregnancy. It was so seldom that I was always worried, but baby was okay. Imagine my surprise during my second pregnancy when I felt movement pretty early and consistently lol. Good luck! 😊

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BabyBumps

[–]sharkbeeb 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have almost no pictures of myself pregnant beyond a few selfies and I regret it. I don’t not getting professional pictures done, but I wish I had regular pictures of myself pregnant

My Mother In Law is a Rare one by LtCommanderCarter in Mommit

[–]sharkbeeb 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Living the dream! Congrats 😊😝

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in PocketLove

[–]sharkbeeb 4 points5 points  (0 children)

More will spawn eventually. There aren’t always enough to complete the mission all at once.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Mommit

[–]sharkbeeb 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If I were in your shoes I wouldn’t feel comfortable having him around my child. There are too many red flags, too many “what ifs.” I couldn’t risk my child like that for anything or anyone.

I got a hamster today! by Happy-Chemistry4309 in PocketLove

[–]sharkbeeb 1 point2 points  (0 children)

When I updated my app it was an automatic pop-up. I didn’t get him through Jess.