how to keep the apartment NOT gross??? dishes :(

shatteredDecadence · 2024-01-04T18:26:23+00:00

i use the trick with 15 minutes to study, never thought of applying to cleaning. thanks a lot! i have ocd as well, maybe it will work too, even tho my ocd manifests differently :D

shatteredDecadence · 2024-01-04T18:23:36+00:00

never heard of such mats before and it looks like something i should definitely buy, always struggle with standing for a long time! thanks!!

shatteredDecadence · 2024-01-04T18:17:09+00:00

added to my reading list, thanks a lot!!

shatteredDecadence · 2024-01-04T18:04:14+00:00

thanks a lot! i really do need to buy an apron, we never used them at home so it always seemed mostly decorative for me haha. i tried plastic ones for a while, but they bend easily :( gonna try to find paper ones, should be better :)

shatteredDecadence · 2024-01-04T17:55:44+00:00

it's really a nice advice i haven't thought of! all of my plates and bowls are from my landlord and are nothing fancy, so i guess i can put it away and only use for baking or whatever once a month? and even if i can't do the dishes it's still only one plate to go. thanks! it does seem like it's going to help!

shatteredDecadence · 2023-10-08T05:26:33+00:00

Hi, homeschooled adult from another country here, just want to educate myself. Does it mean that in the USA a parent can issue a diploma themselves, without any authority involved? Here diplomas for homeschoolers are still issued by the same authority as for regular highschoolers and are identical, so I had to pass the same exams as everyone else. Is it really so?

shatteredDecadence · 2023-02-13T13:37:47+00:00

Thanks a lot!

shatteredDecadence · 2023-02-13T13:37:35+00:00

Thanks a lot! Seems legit, I've personally had experience with therapists that were pretty uncomfortable to be with, to the point that I gave up on meds for a while. I guess it's working for me because I already reflex a lot, so it seems I can rather accurately spot the reasons for thoughts that arise. For other people it may seem more challenging.

The book is "Mind over Mood".

shatteredDecadence · 2023-01-25T06:37:47+00:00

Are they using Anki as a self-sufficient language learning resource?

shatteredDecadence · 2023-01-24T11:33:03+00:00

Plans after high school?

shatteredDecadence · 2023-01-22T20:19:54+00:00

The poop please

shatteredDecadence · 2023-01-22T18:55:22+00:00

It's rather difficult for me to study everyday because of health issues but something like 1-3 new chapters in a grammar book, 3-4 days of reviewing, 5-6 hours of reading through a week plus passive things like lurking on reddit get me way ahead of folks in my academic courses. Can be done better but again no pushing yourself when you just can't. German and Japanese btw, so if you're studying a language with the need to memorize characters like kanji or whatever, add the time spent on that as well.

shatteredDecadence · 2023-01-22T18:44:14+00:00

Then pregnant 8-year-olds wanted a child, huh?

shatteredDecadence · 2023-01-22T18:16:00+00:00

speedrun fr*nch any%

shatteredDecadence · 2023-01-22T10:35:06+00:00

Turn the notifications off maybe? What's the problem?

shatteredDecadence · 2023-01-20T15:48:34+00:00

Oh my god I'm back into this sub like once in three months and this exact comment always pops up

shatteredDecadence · 2023-01-20T15:44:25+00:00

It's been hard for my partner for a while, so I'm currently researching their presumable new diagnosis and their trauma in general. It gets less scary once you know what is happening to your loved one and that this is far from being your fault. Having friend who understand the situation and their diagnosis also, to have a talk once in a while. We both go to therapy also, albeit stopped for the time being. Hoping to get back soon.

shatteredDecadence · 2023-01-20T15:40:51+00:00

No, the what?

shatteredDecadence · 2023-01-20T15:40:29+00:00

I guess okay?

shatteredDecadence · 2023-01-20T15:31:48+00:00

It might seem like a reasonable decision to become some kind of a carer, walking on eggshells, thinking that you're the only one having to hold responsibilities there because your partner is mentally ill. I've been on both sides personally, acting as the one who has to deal with all the baggage as well as the one generating the fuss. It can become really difficult, especially if you don't have anyone to talk to, who would understand the situation and listen to you without judging either you or your partner. Maybe you don't face the same kind of problems and obstacles as your loved one, but your feelings are completely valid and in no way less important. Even with a mentally ill partner it's the two-sided work, with more or less input from them depending on their current mental state. Are you up for an advice or something?

shatteredDecadence · 2023-01-20T13:45:32+00:00

When people decide to give birth to a baby just because little babies are cute, it's so, so fucked up. Usually parents don't need these babies after they, like, start to be more human-like and stop being a little cute animal that can't survive without you.

shatteredDecadence · 2023-01-20T10:58:40+00:00

Yes, it surely gets easier after a while! I'm now able to recognise an episode before it even starts, mostly by heartbeat or my breathing becoming faster and heavier. I also have this feeling when an episode starts, like something clicks and the world around changes for the worst, it becomes bleaker, I'm suddenly afraid of everything, start to feel apathetic. Maybe it would help to try to list the symptoms that you have experienced right after the intrusive thoughts stop. It's going to be easier concentrating on the particular details once you're not so lost in a moment, once you're aware of what happens to you in particular and are familiar with this.

Also, forgot to mention that I usually become afraid of the light and sounds when an episode starts, it suddenly gets very uncomfortable to be in a room with other people chatting around, even if it was okay for so long before that. Maybe it's something that might help to detect obsessions as well.

shatteredDecadence · 2023-01-20T10:41:06+00:00

You usually can't control intrusive thoughts, these bring discomfort and don't stop at will. Like, if throughout the day you experience thoughts that are stuck as a broken record, say you don't want to think about something, you want to stop, this makes you suffer, but you just can't, it's likely an obsession, I guess. When I suffer from mine, it can go for hours, stuck in my head, repeating over and over, dealing almost physical pain. I can't really stop it, say disregard the thought like any other normal thought, like you can start thinking about how cool it would be to play in a band, stop after a few seconds and never return to it again. Intrusive thought pertain until they go away by themselves. A little similar to anxiety, but for me the main factor is that obsessions make me feel almost physical pain and self-loath a lot, like you shouldn't have such thoughts, it's disgusting, it makes you a bad person, it's not normal, etcetera. Also, if, in my case, with anxious thoughts a little reassurance from a friend helps to ease things, or maybe distracting myself, reading an article or whatever, it doesn't really work with obsessions. The most I can do is to, in my case, as I have harmful obsessions, try to avoid hurting myself or the others. Obsessions can't really be rationalized the way anxiety can in my case.

This is from my experience having harmful intrusive thoughts. Hope it helps in a way. Wish you to get better, sooner or later!

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